I understand the fear. But surely as a smart science-y person, you know better than to ACTUALLY use Heidi as a role model?

I don't know if you're seeing a therapist, but it might be helpful.  Living in this much fear isn't a healthy way to live.  

You're prepared to do a WHAT?

Give your head a shake for F sakes. I am becoming increasingly concerned with your posts, "skinny scientist". If you are not already, I would very kindly suggest you consider some counseling to work through your thoughts and behaviours.

Best wishes to you.

I am not sure if you are giving Heidi a credit or making fun of her??? 

Neither.  I am prepared to do whatever it takes so I dont get MO again. And I really dont care what it is. I am pleased with everything this surgery has brought in my life (even the expensive blood draws/labs) and to think it could just go away because my stupid body decided to turn against me AGAIN by growing more villi is just...heart breaking/ saddening/ depressing/head shaking!?!?

I think the above posters are right though. Getting MO isnt as bad as cancer or a million other things. Fat or thin, whatver talents  have are still the same. But I dont want to be a back slider. I am afraid of going back regardless of not doing anything wrong.  Maybe I should talk to a pro about it...because it is a very real fear. But I am also a worry wart!

it is just...there is something easier about life as a thin person. I feel like I dont have to prove myself as much?  Life seems easier?  I really cant put my finger on it.  But there IS something different with my interactions with the world/life.

Anyway, I am out for the weekend for a weekend. So no depressing/concerning posts from Skinny this weekend!  You are all safe!

If you are readily admitting that you will do ANYTHING (including unhealthy and extreme methods)? Then yes, you DO need to talk to a pro.

Ditto what Julie, Karen, and Gwen said.  There are a lot of yellow flags in some of the things you have posted lately, and I think counseling might be useful. Your perspective seems to be becoming a bit skewed.

Your body isn't turning against you.  It is doing what EVERY body does after RNY: protect itself against injury (the bypass) and the resulting potential starvation. The body overcoming the caloric malabsorption is just "part of the deal".

I know it is like telling the kindergarteners that there is no Santa, but I would rather understand how the surgery works and be prepared than just have weight regain and not know why.  Your body is smart and knows what it needs to do to recover from the surgery. 

Regain is normal.  Understand it and be ready to nip it in the bud.  Mine stopped when I faced up to it, started weighing myself daily and realized that it was going to take less calories to maintain at my goal.  That does not mean eating once a day, but for me it means eating five or six times a day and keeping calories at 200 or 300 for a meal.

I know I need 1400 to maintain at 136 and to lose a pound a week I need to cut back to 900 a day.

As someone only a few days out from surgery, I have no personal experience to offer. I think the vets have the best advice.  If you do really want to stop your weight loss now, my idea for you is to get in touch with a nutritionist with Bariatric Surgery experience.  He or she will help you find a way to slow your weight loss in a healthy way and guide you into maintenance, especially as you are in that honeymoon weight loss phase.  There may be other resources on OH or elsewhere, as well, but I think an experienced nutritionist could also help.