Off - Topic : Professional Segway

I have a few questions for everyone.

How much of your self-esteem is tied to your professional life? How has this effected you during your weight loss journey?

Were you employed before surgery and if not was it your weight that prevented employment? Did you start a job search after losing most of your weight and were you successful? 

Did lack of work or possibly over working yourself prior to surgery effect your self worth? How about after surgery or significant weight loss? 

I'm asking because I am looking for a way to separate my professional ego from this weight loss journey. I have been looking for work since before surgery at my highest weight. It has been a year of interviews - after not working since 2007 due to health ailments and needing what little energy I had to care for our kids. Trying to re-enter the workforce is a true test of resilience from rejection. I don't eat my feelings anymore and I am at a loss for a coping mechanism for dealing with NOT getting a position. I won't give up - I'm not that kind of person. In the mean time treading water is getting tiresome and I ache to sprint. Please share some of your insight. 

I have been very fortunate in my present position.  I am respected as a valuable employee even when I was at my top weight.  There are many employers though who have attached negative stigma to overweight individuals and don't hire them.  With that being said you have been out of the workforce for awhile now and you may need to bone up on your skills.  Most state employment offices offer programs to assist people who have been out of work - preparing resumes, updating skills and participating in interview training.  Acing an interview is a great way to secure a job!  And not getting the job is upsetting but remember there are many people out there trying to get the same job so you should not take it personally.  Good luck and may the right job land in your lap!  (And congrats on your weight loss)

Thank you! Maybe your good luck wishes were just what I needed because I got a call this afternoon after I posted this here and I GOT THE JOB!!!!!! I can't even tell you how excited I am and while I am elated to be back to work I need to still figure out how to tone down how heavily I weigh work upon my happiness. Thanks again for your response. 

LOL, I thought you meant you rode a Segway at work, not a conversational segue. 

Anyway---I have a leadership position in a very large financial services company for a highly specialized line of business within the company. When my current manager inherited me from another manager she remarked to me a few months later than I was not at all like anyone else in our group (meaning the entire LOB) and said 'yet you are very successful and the client base raves about you' and while she did not come out and say it, the way I am different is my weight. I majored in Finance, have a long career in FS with a number of accolades, awards and commendations. I parent two children in a suburban home with my husband and all the things that come along with that. So take away the weight and I am exactly like they are. 

I work with slim to beyond slim people. My manager needs to gain 10 lbs and 'just can't seem to get the weight on no matter how hard I try' Ugh! The entire group looks like an 'after' ad for name any health/diet program save for a few males in leadership positions. I literally am not aware of another obese woman in the group. We have several running groups, tennis leagues, cross fit groups and so forth across the company within my LOB. I was 333 lbs and nearly 6 feet tall. I stood out like a big sore thumb in meetings. But to much of my client base, I am invisible because they don't meet me in person, we do things via conference calls and online meetings. I am 208 now and still one of the largest people in the room, but thankfully now smaller than some of the larger male execs. ;)

So anyway...because I had great career success I think that was the one place where I generally felt immune from my weight being an issue. I saw it in volunteering at school with my boys or even at church. Not in a negative way, but in a 'it is noticed' way and once my manager said that to me at work, I felt more aware of it there, as well.  

The thing that I remind myself even now, very close to goal, is that strangers walking down the street would still classify me as fat. I am still technically obese, but per the BMI charts I am only a few lbs (4 I think) from being simply overweight. But of course, at the highest end of that. 

So if you are not to your goal and on your maintenance journey, people are not going to realize that you have lost X and now look so different. They only see what you present today. And no good manager would hire for looks unless it was a modeling position, because the skill set and personality that meshes into a cohesive team is going to win over looks every single time. Of course, there are less than stellar managers who would choose looks over those things, and that is when you have a dysfunctional team. But that is a diatribe for another day. :)

What is your profession--not down to the nitty gritty role, but what generally do you do and is it a highly competitive field where you should expect a level of rejection or one where you really should have been offered a role and that is not happening? If it is the latter, I would work with an interview and resume coach ASAP. I cannot begin to count the number of resumes that come to me and I toss them because they either did not know how to market themselves well for the role OR they were atrociously 'finished' with typos, formatting issues and errors of fact (if a company closed in 2008, don't put you worked there until 2009 for example) all of which call into question their ability to have a laser focus on details in the workplace. 

You might also want to consider volunteering in your field, or looking for internships if you are not in a senior position, to help bolster skills. You have been out of the workforce a very long time and having some fresh experience could go a very long way for many hiring managers. I know it does for me!