feeling defeated

I am down today and am going to give myself a pity party.  Give me a day or two and I will get over it, but today I am going to feel sorry for myself. A little background:  I had RNY April of 2011.  I have lost 146 pounds and reached my goal of a normal BMI and weight.  I am 5'8.  About 6 months post op I started having problems with my thyroid.  I have been hypo for years, but it was well controlled.  My 6 month blood work came back with a TSH of 24.  I have been trying to regulate it for 1 year and a half and still have a TSH of 10.  My PCP doesn't want to refer me to an endocrinologist.  When I had test run in December he didn't even call me to tell me it was still abnormal.  I assumed it was fine.(bad mistake on my part.) I finally called on Monday.  We are military and the new protocol is not to make appointments to go over lab work.  So he increased the meds without talking to me.  I spoke with a nurse.  I do have an appointment the end of January to demand some action.  

I had an appointment with my surgeon on Thursday.  He told me that there was no point in discussing further weight loss until my thyroid is under control.  He said I probably don't even realize how much it effects me because it has been off for so long.  

I want to lose about 10 more pounds, but I the scale hasn't budged for months.  I know it is because of my thyroid.  I track everything and follow all the rules. (over 100 grams of protein, 64 oz of water, 30 grams or less of fat, good carbs.) I am eating 1200 calories a day.  If I eat more than that I gain.  I work out 5 days a week and burn between 800 and 1000 calories a session. This includes Pilates, cardio, and weight training.  I have a heart rate monitor I wear to track this. 

I am so scared that I have wasted my weight loss time with thyroid issues.   I am scared that if I ever have a cheat day or eat more than 1200 calories then I will regain my weight.  I wonder why I even bother if my exercise and work doesn't make a difference.  I went in to the last appointment with my surgeon wanting to discuss my nutrition and having metabolic testing, but he said he won't discuss it until my thyroid is normal.  What if I can't get a normal  TSH?

I will still do my run today and continue to eat healthy.  I know that I am much healthier than I was 2 years ago even if I never lose any more weight.  I want to be smaller than a size 12.  There are just days like today I question if I will ever get there.

(((hugs))) I am sorry you are going through this with your thyroid. You are doing so well, and there is definitely hope you can get your thyroid under control.

Thank you.  I just need to feel sorry for myself for a day.  I know in my heart that my work will pay off.

Demand to see an endocrinologist! If they refuse go to head of medicine! Only they can help at this point!

That is my plan.  I was not brought up to question Dr's.  Even my Surgeon said this is ridiculous.  If I was his family member he would be demanding answers.

Military can't deny u the specialists bc of one doc saying no. Go over heads...squeaky wheel gets the oil

I can feel your pain.  My surgery that was scheduled for 1/4 was canceled because my thyroid was 79!  I had been having a lot of issues and was either not taking it or not taking it properly for awhile.  The doc said when it gets to 20 they will reschedule me.  I am supposed to take 250 mcs daily but have been taking 275 faithfully since 12/26.  I am going to have a blood draw on Friday and hope that it is at the proper level.

Are you aware that thyroid meds have to be taken first thing in the morning with nothing other than water, black coffee or tea with nothing to eat and no other meds for at least an hour or they will not be absorbed?  Just thought I would ask, because I would end up just grabbing a handful of pills and even if I was taking the thyroid, it was not getting absorbed.  I had no idea it would get that bad though.

 

148# is a lot to lose and I would be thrilled with a size 12.  In fact, I do not remember wearing a smaller size, except maybe a 10 in pants.

Good luck to you.

I will keep my fingers crossed next friday for you.

I usually take my meds first thing in the morning without anything.  Thanks for your reply.

I feel for you! I too have been dealing with hypothyroid (uncontrolled) for 12 years. My last TSH was 57. I'm working with an endocrinologist and am taking 250 mcg synthroid and 50 mcg cytomel. I see a new dr tues to see if they may be able to help. I hope they can figure things out for the both if us!

If you are at a Military Treatment Facility (MTF) go see your BCAC (Beneficiary Concealing and Assistance Coordinator) or ask to see your patient advocate.  That is ridiculous and you are not limited to the whims of your PCM. 

If your PCM is not at a MTF go to the web and try to find your closest BCAC.  You shouldn't have to waste time puting your health at risk because you have  stubborn doc.