Sometimes I just like to go back ....
.... and step into that pair of older pants ****pt one in each plus size on the way down to goal) and see and feel that after 6 years I can still fit my fully dressed lower body into ONE LEG of my old size 20's pants ... and remember that at the start of my journey my pants sizes were 28-32 no thanks to my big bertha that I still have ....
Sometimes I just like to go back ... and realize how much it is worth it and I press on and enjoy life to the fullest...
Me yesterday in ONE LEG of my old size 20's slacks...
Sometimes I just like to go back ... and shop in my closet for that dress that I want to wear to an event ... and realize that I can STILL fit in the same clothes that I wore when I was wayyyyyyyyyyyyy below goal at 111 pounds and looking gaunt and that today at my maintenance weight that fluctuates between 123-127 pounds that I have been maintaining for a solid 6 years without going over I can still rock those very same clothes and shop in my closet ... even strutting my mid fifties legs and remnant thunder thighs and big Bertha ... resigned to the dynamics of my genes ... and loving it and being so totally goofy with it ... cause I am silly like that and mean no harm by it!!!
Sometimes I just like to go back .... to selecting different choices in my own closet and not limiting myself to certain stores/selections.... I remember when even getting shoes in the right fit/width was a problem.... so I decided to wear this dress to an event last night...
Sometimes I just like to go back ... and remember how easy it is to cross my legs and hold things on my lap ... even when I remember mom (RIP) always telling me that ladies don't cross their legs... I could never figure that one out ... being a proud tomboy growing up....
Sometimes I just like to go back and remind myself that there are awesome support sites for WLS in all its varieties and that OH has provided a space for me to share SNIPPETS of my journey and picture AWing as I encourage myself by not forgetting how far I have come and by maybe encouraging someone else along the way ... we can do this!
So I post my empowerment collage today ... and I share goofy SNIPPETS of my journey ... as I look forward to going back home to our new house with the huge unfinished basement .... and as I miss my wall where I used to paint my murals ... I found a wooden wall temporarily up till the work is underway to fini**** up in the new place (an awesome OLD house closer to the beach with French doors and wooden floors that I LOVE)....
I had fun with my pallet and my brushes and my toy poodles as I painted on a raw... rough...wooden wall a mural that is playing out in my head (rough draft right now) and I do not know where it is going to.... I saw online a picture of a poodle chasing a butterfly and I thought how awesome would that be if I could capture it on this wall.... I took a picture of it and me and my poodles on my way to work today...
Sometimes I just like to go back ... and dig in my chest of lace fronts and hair pieces and extensions and....HOLD UP ... THAT IS ANOTHER STORY LOL.....
Sometimes I just love to go back .... and do a before and after collage... and paint... and make dolls... and play with my ferrets... and cuddle my toy poodles .... I can bend... I can run... I can stoop ... I no longer have 5 co-morbidities nor limited mobility..... the tide has turned and I am rolling with it NEVER FORGETTING EVER where I came from .... my fat before is very much me now ....we walk side by side ... encouraging each other .... one keeps me in remembrance and the other keeps me focused.... I refuse to forget....
SOMETIMES I JUST LOVE TO GO BACK ... AND SEE/FEEL/KNOW THAT IT IS ALL WORTH IT!!!
Thanks for allowing me to share.... SNIPPETS OF MY JOURNEY ...