Seeing, Feeling, Knowing

But make no mistake. As you get further out you are more like non-ops yes. But you are not a non-op. You have requirements, not only where vitamins and diet are concerned but awareness. Obviously genetically you are predisposed to obesity. Your genes KNOW obesity. As time wears on your entire body, down to your cells, may begin to work to take you BACK to obesity because that is what your body knows (and essentially how human bodies are built). So I'm sorry to tell you this...but you don't get the luxury of graduating. That's not to say you will or should spend a bunch of time worrying and being afraid. Not at all! But stay aware. Those I've seen who had near total regain have also told me that it happened because they stopped paying attention to themselves and their processes.

The entire post is worth reading.....I'd like to elaborate on the above to new post-ops or to those that are out a year or two and still enjoying the high of losing weight and possibly still losing.  This time will come and it's important to remember where you came from, how you got to where you are now and that it never entirely ends.  We are special in our needs and anatomy and it's important to always stay aware and I STRONGLY encourage each of us to stay active and continue to learn about our surgery......things do continue to evolve. 

I look at myself as a guinea pig to RNY surgery.....it's CHANGED tremendously from the time I began researching WLS almost 10 years ago.

Nik:

I saw your post about 1 minute after I posted about how depressed I am about my body and life 2 years and 9 months post-op.  You are right, life takes over and you begin to feel normal and try to act normal but the fact remains WE ARE NOT NORMAL!!! I am so sad at how my body image is so freaking distorted now.  I literally feel like I am 375 pounds right now and all I have eaten today totals around 330 calories But funny thing is....when I was 375 I felt like I may have weighed about 200 (I was being modest because I was still a thick girl ).  Now I weigh between 194 and 200 pounds (depends on the time of the month).

I sometimes wonder if I were able to actually have the skin removed would I begin to see myself in a different light or would I still see the same fat woman.  Do you hear much about people still not seeing themselves smaller even after they have had their skin removed?

I promised myself that I was going to start back focusing on ME again - taking time to go to the gym, paying attention to what I eat, take my vitamins and just overall be on a "mission" again.  A mission for my success, a mission to love me. 

But for the right now - I am on a "mission of depression"

thanks for the wonderful post

Some people see themselves somewhat differently after having excess skin removed (it definitely improves the overall sense of satisfaction with their body), but that is not going to make you see 195 pounds instead of 375 pounds.  That is a distortion in your brain that losing half a dozen to a dozen pounds of excess skin is almost certainly not going to change.  A counselor can help you find out what is at the root of the dysmorphia, though, and help you find individualized ways to overcome it.

Lora