Alone on Thanksgiving-BY CHOICE-Vent

We have an alternating year plan with my married kids and this is the year that they spend at the "in-laws" for Thanksgiving and will spend Christmas with our family. My younger (unmarried) kids are going to their Dad's house. My ex and his gf (well technically we are still married, neither of us has bothered to file for divorce) invited me to come to my old house for dinner, LOL.....not in this lifetime!!!  

I do not like turkey and have never felt anything special for the holiday. I am thankful every day for what I have! My older daughter has invited me to her house, as have several friends. I am totally happy to stay home, decorate for Christmas and will probably cook a small roast beef (if I can find one at the grocery store today!). My phone rang no less than 5 times yesterday with people all worried about me being alone for the holiday. I know it will continue again today. I think that at the age of 55 I should be able to do what I want to do and not be bugged about it!!

Vent over- Happy Thanksgiving to all my OH family 

If you are happy with your plans just let people know you appreciate their thoughtfulness but you are planning to spend the day doing fun things and couldn't be happier. 

I hope your day is exactly what you want it to be if not more!!!

That sounds depressing.

 

The 'nuclear family' sure includes a lot of pressure on people.  Personally I applaud you for making your own decision to be in the comforts of your own surroundings and enjoy your time the way you see fit.  Sounds like th ex and his gf are being very grand by including you in their plans but I would be taking the same stand (not a movie shoot for Hollywood).  Taking yourself out of the game can translate into filling up your own comforts and being happy about it.  I hope you find a roast to savor and spoil yourself while you decorate (or not) your own space.  

Just make it clear to everyone, that you really are good with being alone over the Thanksgiving holiday and that you are actually looking forward to it, and getting things done around the house.  At the same time, you must feel grateful that you have all these caring people in your life who worry about you.

Giselle

Yeah, what Giselle said.  It is one thing to be alone when you truly WANT to be with others, and to feel lonely and isolated, but it is quite another to be happily solitary even if the calendar "says" you should be with others.

Enjoy your day!

Lora

I have assured everyone in every way I know how multiple times but they won't back off!

REALLY I am happy!

This kind of event in families seems to be quite common these days. Thanksgiving here Christmas there etc. But on the other hand, at our age, my wife and I would love to be alone for dinner at least and then we could visit the rest of the family and friends that we know with much less work on our part, but NO. Everyone comes to our house. We are old and decrepit. My poor wife has a very bad back, and artificial knees and it hurts her to have to stand a long time and make dinner for 20 to 25 family and friends. I do as much as I can and some of the kids, close, come over to help but still it is a problem for us. Let alone the cost. We have tried to get one of the kids to have the dinner at their house but they are young and working and do not have the time or money to do it so it falls on us. So be thankful you can just stay home and eat a nice meal by yourself. We are going to have to provide the dinner I thin****il we fall over dead. So be thankful for what you have. I am. 

Interesting, Larry.

My own dear mama made the dinner until she retired from work, sold her house, and started RVing. I tried to take over and discovered cleaning, cooking, and cleaning some more was not how I wanted to spend two days. How and why did Mom do that all those years? I guess she's old school and wanted her family around. I, being domestically impaired, and now gluttony impaired (TYJesus, Medicare, and Dr. Folek!), break it down to poaching a slab of salmon and throwing in some local berries and other native foods. Either that or going out to eat. This year it's figure skating on TV followed by casual early bird dinner.

Rambling on when all I meant to say was, I betcha your family would spend the day with you even if your wife didn't exhaust herself for them. 

 Dagne, you put it exactly in perspective!