Does everyone fear regain??

I am 3.5 years out and absolutely fear regain.  I am super obsessive with getting on the scale daily to be sure I do not!  Talked to my doc about it (because my daughters insist I should not get on the scale daily and I am too obsessed with my weight) and he told me for some people it is good to have that fear ... it keeps you in check.  IDK ... IDK if it is good or bad, but ... that's ME and it is working for ME!

TOTAL regain, yes. But not in a "walking around afraid" sort of way. More like in a "this is why I carry my ass to the gym" kind of way. 

Incremental regain, no, not at all. I've been there, done that. And guess what? I'm still here! Something about your worst fear happening is very empowering. 

I also don't fear food. It's food. I eat it. Most of the time I make good choices simply because they make me feel PHYSICALLY better than less-than-stellar choices. But I won't lie. There is pizza, cookies, chips and cake in my life occasionally. But it's food. Not a demon. Not my best friend. Not anything but...food.

But since you've known me from the beginning you know it hasn't always been that way and that it was a long and emotional road to get here!

I am 100% sure that I will NEVER have total regain, so that is not a fear, but I REALLY appreciate your characterization of fearing it "in a walking around" way vs. "this is why I carry my ass to the gym".  I suppose that the second is the way I feel... I do certain things or make certain choices in order to maintain my weight, but that is what I am thinking in my mind... MAINTAINING what I have achieved and the weight I am at...  rather than thinking about doing it so I don't REGAIN.  To some people that might seem like an extremely fine distinction, but for me it is a significant one (yes, I analyze everything... Makes me a good counselor but can drive myself crazy when I am the target).  My focus is on being happy with, and wanting to keep, where I am at... So that is my focus... so fear of regain isn't what is in my head.  Does that make any sense??  (I didn't get a lot of sleep last night, so I am not  in peak communication condition!)

 

Lora

Perfect sense! I guess I do it to maintain too but that took me a while. For a little bit I really did think it was ALL going to come back. Now I'm more like Under Armour: "Protect this house!"

I do fear regain, but it is complicated. I believe that I have changed and I have a whole new lifestyle compared to pre op. I know I watch my food and eat what I should, but I also believe that I was addicted to food and still am. I worry sometimes that I wont be able to fight the addiction any more and the food demons will win especially if something was to happen in my life that might make me lose control and get in that cycle of self hate, self destruction.

For me it is a battle every day to stay focused, love myself, forgive myself, and remind myself that I am stronger than the food!

 

Great post!

 

I absolutely fear it.  But mostly I fear getting to goal!  Crazy huh.  I have been an excellent dieter all my life and have gain and lost 100 pounds at least 3 times.  It is when I am done and ready to go to maintenance that I generally screw up.  It is yeah do the victory lap and then eat what you want.  So this time when I do get to the goal that my body decides is the right place for me I have to go in with a whole new mindset.  This is not a diet but a way of life and all the pieces need to stay in place, eating right, daily exercise and proud of my accomplishment.  I have to keep reminding myself that this is a life time commitment and reaffirm that everyday.

Carolyn

I know I'm still a newbie at 7 months out, but I'm close to goal and I have to say I don't fear regain. I'm young, disciplined, and confident I will continue eating healthy and exercising. When I commit I really commit. I never suffered from food addiction or had a weakness for food. I know those are some of the reasons some people regain--they fall off the wagon. I'm confident I won't, hence the lack of fear. I'm also very aware how its normal for women's weight to fluctuate so I've promised myself not to freak about two or three pounds. Anything over ten might make me worry though. If I ever get to that point I'll worry about it then and I'll seek the advice of the vets. So no, Lora, you're not alone.

I think for me its not so much fear of regain because I know how to avoid it, but I fear myself, I fear I will stop caring and stop trying and then I will regain and be completely miserable.  I know one day when I am old and don't care anymore I will probably start eating whatever and get fat again.  But then it won't matter.

LOL. I actually HAVE wondered what will happen when I am old and potentially an invalid, and I had the same thought! Given my genetic history, though, even with a normal weight, I am unlikely to live to be quite old.

Lora

This is what I think about regain. Through the miracle of surgery I had about 2 years where I neither gain or lost weight.. An absolute foreign concept and something that was amazing to experience. I know how to do it now and it's within my skill set.

I have to move every day and eat protein first. Really that's about it. THere are other things but those are the biggies.

Since the kidney transplant and my mother dying I have had a 40 pound regain. I am  not freaking out. I needed those 9 months to take a brain break from  food monitoring. I needed the comfort of food and found it. It was a dark and difficult time in many ways. I'm just glad I survived it. In the back of my grief/numbed brain there was this hope and knowledge that it wouldn't have to always be this way.

II would never give myself a hard time

. I have been very deliberate and aware of what I'm doing. I do have faith that I can apply what I know and bring it back down. How much I won't know but when I get there ..when the body finds that number I will go back to keeping it within a 10 pound range.. Something I know I can do for the rest of my life.

Deb T.