Husband doesn't agree with the RnY I had
He said, "I didn't think you'd go through with it". Um yeah I did jackass!
And he has the nerve to be butthurt that I seem hostile toward him. I am so done with him about right now
He may come around and maybe he doesn't realize that NOW is not the time to voice up. Once pain is over, hormones get settled (and that'll take a few months), and you start adjusting to your new life, ask him what he REALLY fears about you having this surgery. Is he afraid you'll get so hot & leave him? Is he concerned for how your new life will affect him? Does he have his own insecurities? So often those that give us push-back about the surgery have less to do with us and more to do with them.
First ultra: Stone Mill 50 miler 11/15/14 13:44:38, First Full Marathon: Marine Corps 10/27/13 4:57:11, Half Marathon PR 2:04:43 at Shamrock VA Beach Half-Marathon, 12/2/12 First Half-Marathon 2:32:47, 5K PR Run Under the Lights 5K 27:23 on 11/23/13, 10K PR 52:53 Pike's Peek 10K 4/21/13, (1st timed run) Accumen 8K 51:09 10/14/12.
Who was your support meeting at your preop consult with your surgeon? My surgeon will NOT do any wt loss surgery on a patient until he actually meets your support person to help you the first few weeks at home. That said, you need to inform "Mr. uniformed" that you need help, whether he agrees or not. Where did he think you went when you had surgery???? DAVE
Dave Chambers, 6'3" tall, 365 before RNY, 185 low, 200 currently. My profile page: product reviews, tips for your journey, hi protein snacks, hi potency delicious green tea, and personal web site.
Does he not want you to be healthy, ask him how many 70 year old women he has seen your size?
Regards
Allen
Keep doing your program and try not to get discouraged with his attitude. Agree to disagree on this and keep your chin up!!!
This is not the way you get support from those in your life.
My wife and myself went through a difficult period in the days and weeks after surgery but we discussed the issues and came to an understanding. She had her concerns and I had mine, we learned that there were things I just would not give up on and we both had to give a little and come to a mutual understanding about what our new life would be.
Believe it or not it isn't easy for a spouse to go through this either.
Maybe stepping back for a bit and considering his concerns if you have ever really spoken about them might show you where he is coming from.
The other option is you continue to treat him this way and then ***** in a few months how you have ZERO support and have to do it all alone.
First 5K 9/27/20 46:32 - 11 weeks post op (PR 28:55 8/15/11)
First 10K 7/04/2011 1:03 First 15K 9/18/2011 1:37
First Half Marathon 10/02/2011 2:27:44 (PR 2:24:35)
First Half Ironman 9/30/12 7:32:04
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