Sorta OT - I'm thinking of holding a funeral...

 Well not really. But some rite of passage that signifies that I am no longer Ye Olde Nik****30 lb. Nikki). This has been on my mind a lot lately.

I’ll always be a part of the WLS community (I write BF for goodness sakes!) but I still define a lot of my successes and achievements against what Ye Olde Nikki did, would have done, would not have done, could not have done. And I think that holds me back a little.

I mentioned this to Neen in the eating thread. I’m going to stop comparing my fitness now (in my head AND on paper) to what I could have done pre-op. Sometimes I’ll post on Facebook that I had an ok workout and folks who knew me way back when go “way to go! That’s a great workout!" I appreciate that. And my intent is not to beat myself up. But in comparing “Fit Nik" to “Fit Nik" it was just an ok workout. Yes, it is awesome in comparison to what Ye Olde Nik would have done, but it’s just ok in comparison to what I’ve managed to achieve as a fit person.

I am nearly 5 years post-op. It’s time to make some goals with my benchmark being who I am now (and have been for quite a few years now) instead of who I WAS. If that makes any sense.

So I’m open to ideas. But I’d like to do something to honor Ye Olde Nik (she was brave enough, after all, to take the first step in this whacky journey!) but signify that Ye Olde Nik does not define the Nik of today. She is where I came from but where I am going is based on improving what I am right here in THIS moment.

Let me know if this all sounds hooky. 

It's beautiful.  I'd like to forget the old me too.  buriel sounds good. 

 Oh you misunderstand me. I don't want to forget my old self. I just don't want to live my life in reaction to my old self. 

But never forget...

 Good thoughts.  I'm one for comparing the new you to the old you on an occasional basis in a "look how far I've come" kinda way... but I'm MORE for comparing today's you to yesterday's you and tomorrow's you to today's you.  It creates constant growth and keeps pushing me forward.  Yeah I did an 8.0 sprint at the gym... cool... I couldn't do THAT 2 1/2 years ago.  But you know what... a few weeks ago I did two 8.0's AND an 8.5 so why am I going backwards?

You haven't been that person for a long time, so it's high time to stop gauging yourself by her accomplishments.  Growth, baby, growth.  Push the limits.

 I don't think it sounds hooky at all.  I posted not too long ago about how I just wanted to completely forget I was ever morbidly obese and just be the new me.  People didn't like that. Lots of comments about how forgetting will encourage regain, etc.  That's not exactly what I meant--this post is more what I meant.  I don't want to keep looking back and thinking about who I was. 

If we keep measuring our progress by comparing it to our worst case situation, it's always gonna look pretty amazing, and pushing ourselves ever harder and making NEW progress will be that much more difficult, because it will be easier to get complacent. 

I think it's a wonderful idea. I'll be very interested to se what kind of farewell you give Ye Olde Nik. Keep us posted. 

Burning an old outfit and a pot of ghetto goulash in effigy? No, just kidding. But I do get what you are saying and a formal gesture would be helpful in making a break from the old and welcoming the new.

Edited for sense. If I don't understand my own point, no one else will either.

How about having a little get together with friends to give Ye Olde Nik a send off and farewell and to welcome The New Nik?

 OMG you made me laugh out loud at work! You remembered the ghetto goulash!!!

Extra points for you!

What a thoughtful process. I would have a celebration for the new or not so new Nik with a private thank you tothe old Nik.

Do we send flowers?? LOL. You come up with the most amazing ideas ! I too hope to someday say goodbye to the old me.

 I'm a firm believer in never forgetting where we came from. Those struggles make up our core being. It's the lessons we learned (and most of them the hard way!) of not only how to do something, but how to NOT do something as well. Having said that, I'm all for throwing Ye Olde Nikki a "retirement party". Putting her out to pasture so to speak. (not that you're a horse!) then you can "visit" Ye Olde Nikki when needed.