I think I live in this body now (rambles...)

 Though we're only OH friends - and I promise I'll make it up to B'more to see you in person someday - I just gotta say this..... I love you for loving yourself!!!! My heart shines to hear such positive words!!

You are amazing !! I worry about if I ever get to have the surgery, lose weight, ect if there will ever come a day when I like myself. One can only hope, I suppose.  I'm glad you are at peace with yourself and can express it--like I said you are AWESOME !!!!!

What a beautiful post...thank you! I think it was a Sunday two weeks ago when I actually felt good for the first time in so long. I stopped to analyze my emotions (as is my wont on many occasions) and I realized what I was doing...I was taking care of myself! Actually lovingly, truly, without self-doubt or self-hatred, taking care of myself! What a concept. I am fueled by the possibility that life can be filled with such contentment and peace and self-love. Amen Nik!

 I, too, am an analyzer...to the point I think I've hit the crazy spot! lol I always love reading your posts. You are able to say so well what some of us are feeling but unable to express.  I am not there yet being fully comfortable in this body, When I am, I will definitely reflect back on this post. (can you say bookmark?!) lol  


Thanks, Nik!!! 

That is so fabulous, Nik!

Yes, the change in you since I have known you is tremendous! I first liked you because you were a kindred spirit in terms of being analytical and straightforward. Now, I am amazed by you... By your ability to embrace yourself as you are in this very moment. I wish I could stand at that line with you, but... I am not there... yet.

I probably had a more positive self-image initially (say 10 years ago) than you did, but I allowed some of the vile things that the men who attacked me said to me get into my head and it really screwed with parts of my sense of self. So I am still working on that in therapy, as well as still working on the small part of me that is still disappointed not to be a size 8. If I ignore my 10/12 clothing size, though, and don't look at my thighs, I am happy with my body... Including the DDD-cup breasts that hang to my waist and the burn-like scar across my rib cage from the tummy tuck that turned necrotic. So... I am CLOSE. Just not quite there yet. I can also join you in saying that I like MOST parts of myself... and some days, I can say it without the "most" added in. Unfortunately, there are some days that I still hear "their " voices in my head... and the process of healing from serious trauma is slow.

Continue to proclaim your fabulousness... and continue to encourage US to embrace and proclaim OURS. There are so many here (including me some days) who need to hear the message!

Lora