OT Rant - I'm not mad or surprised, just annoyed
I'm so sorry !
For what it's worth my dad was very much the same way. I moved out of my mom's house right after high school and my dad rarely came to visit or volunteer to help move or anything. I oculd probaly count on one hand the times he came to my apartment. My mom was much more involoded. Last summer i moved again and ended up in the same town as my dad. Literally 5 minutes down the road from him, and he passes me on his way to work. He has stopped here and say Hi maybe 3 times. maybe. My uncle owns the business across the street from where I live and my dad stops there all the time, he still doesn't stop by and say hi.
My surgery is on Monday, I had to specially ask my dad to take the morning off on Wednesday when I come home so he could drive me!!!!!!
Keep doing what your doing. when your kiddos are older they will see how much he takes them for granted. and how much you love and care for them.
Update: I just talked to my father about my surgery and since I have so many people coming to see me in and out of surgery on Monday he's just going to come visit on Tuesday. I'm baffled. also not surprised.
For what it's worth my dad was very much the same way. I moved out of my mom's house right after high school and my dad rarely came to visit or volunteer to help move or anything. I oculd probaly count on one hand the times he came to my apartment. My mom was much more involoded. Last summer i moved again and ended up in the same town as my dad. Literally 5 minutes down the road from him, and he passes me on his way to work. He has stopped here and say Hi maybe 3 times. maybe. My uncle owns the business across the street from where I live and my dad stops there all the time, he still doesn't stop by and say hi.
My surgery is on Monday, I had to specially ask my dad to take the morning off on Wednesday when I come home so he could drive me!!!!!!
Keep doing what your doing. when your kiddos are older they will see how much he takes them for granted. and how much you love and care for them.
Update: I just talked to my father about my surgery and since I have so many people coming to see me in and out of surgery on Monday he's just going to come visit on Tuesday. I'm baffled. also not surprised.
Well...I'm not exactly sure. They shrug things off but I'm not sure if it's because they are holding stuff in or if this is just par for the course.
RNY Gastric Bypass 1-8-08 350/327/200 (HW/SW/CW). I spend most of my time playing with my food over at Bariatric Foodie - check me out!
How long had it been since he saw his children?
it sounds to me like he doesn`t care about them very much.
How could ne NOT WANT to see hIs kids?
Gimmer his address, I`ll tell him what I think!!
Makes me so mad when parents do this to children. Whehter is be the Mom or the Dad.
Please talk with your kids, holding in feelings are not healthy,
perhaps they don`t feel as if Dad loves them enough to visit.
Let them talk it out , maybe amongst themselves if you suggest that?
it sounds to me like he doesn`t care about them very much.
How could ne NOT WANT to see hIs kids?
Gimmer his address, I`ll tell him what I think!!
Makes me so mad when parents do this to children. Whehter is be the Mom or the Dad.
Please talk with your kids, holding in feelings are not healthy,
perhaps they don`t feel as if Dad loves them enough to visit.
Let them talk it out , maybe amongst themselves if you suggest that?
Jennifer
RNY 5/30/08
S/W 236
C/W 115
Ahh, ma coeur, we're in similar situations. My son's father is fairly disinterested as well. I've offered repeatedly to give him as much visitation as he wants (despite my misgivings that he's a relatively unfit father) and he always refuses. He sees his son one weekend per month, and sticks him with a babysitter during half that time. And in between visits, he has never called. never written. never checked in, never attended a single event. Never. In over 5 years. It boggles me how you can have such an engaging, bright, funny kid and not care. At least with your BD, he has the potential for betterness. Mine doesn't. I'm pretty sure he's not capable of anything beyond the emotional bare minimum.
So I'm with ya, sister. Who knows? I'm glad he's safe. Good for you for not sinking and belittling him. I feel the same way--it might make us feel better, but it doesn't do anyone any favors. You're doing a wonderful job, so if he's not interested, all you can do is keep being a great mom. :) You got this.
So I'm with ya, sister. Who knows? I'm glad he's safe. Good for you for not sinking and belittling him. I feel the same way--it might make us feel better, but it doesn't do anyone any favors. You're doing a wonderful job, so if he's not interested, all you can do is keep being a great mom. :) You got this.
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Check out my video blog! www.youtube.com/user/HappilyShrinking/videos
Highest weight: 269. Surgery weight: 233. Goal weight: 144, and then we'll see..
Check out my video blog! www.youtube.com/user/HappilyShrinking/videos
Highest weight: 269. Surgery weight: 233. Goal weight: 144, and then we'll see..
I am so glad you are being a wonderful mother, even if he isn't being such a great guy right now.
I am going to be 58 next week and I can still hear my mom telling me when I was 7 that my dad didn't want me and she has tapes from court to proove it. I can even remember exactly what I was wearing down to the color of my shoes.
Stuff like that really f&^cks up a child.
Keep your mouth shut , they will find out on there own when they are older what kind of man he is , I pray he is good to them !!!
It is so frustrating because it is the mom's who have to pick up the pieces and dad just goes along his merry way
The children are the ONLY important people here , wish their dad knew that
I am going to be 58 next week and I can still hear my mom telling me when I was 7 that my dad didn't want me and she has tapes from court to proove it. I can even remember exactly what I was wearing down to the color of my shoes.
Stuff like that really f&^cks up a child.
Keep your mouth shut , they will find out on there own when they are older what kind of man he is , I pray he is good to them !!!
It is so frustrating because it is the mom's who have to pick up the pieces and dad just goes along his merry way
The children are the ONLY important people here , wish their dad knew that
Donna Q. --5'8" -60 years old
Band 2005
hw320 sw276 lw with band 195 gw 160-180?
Bypass 4/4/2012
pre sw 258 lw RNY 162 cw 203
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