Single Ladies and Dating??!! Help!!

 So, I have my surgery scheduled for May 21st and I just started seeing someone. We had our 2nd date (so it's up in the air on what will happen) but it went really well.  This made me start thinking about how I tell a guy I'm seeing about the surgery.  

I know I shouldn't be embarrassed but part of me is.  Like I failed myself and I guess I worry he might think the same thing. Obviously if he did he's not the guy for me but just curious how anyone else has approached this issue?? 

I'm sure if it's not this guy it will be someone after the surgery.  Lol explaining why I can't go on a date for 2 weeks cause i'm post-op or that oh BTW can't eat anything but my protein shakes on a date might be strange if I don't explain. hahaha 

Thoughts!??!! 

I was thinking with the guy I'm seeing I'd wait at least until our 4th date....but what the HELL do I say. hahahaha SAVE ME! 

OK THIS IS MY OPINION....I say tell him a few days before, either 1 of two things will happen, A) he is a chubby chaser, and will say forget it...(which means he wasn't the right guy for you)...Or B) He will be supportive and maybe even help heal you though the process... Either way its best to be truthful with someone you care for...think of eating as an addition you needed to do something about, in order for YOU to be a healthy YOU....Again just my opinion.

how could he not like you even more if he noos you trying to make yourself a better healther person dam girls you all are looking good do let no one take your self esteam it will be his loos

I would tell him straight out how excited you are for your upcoming surgery. Let the chips fall where they may. Good time early on to see what kind of guy he really is. I'm hoping for you he's a great guy and supports you through it. But remember if he doesn't then how lucky are you to find out early on instead of once you've fallen for him. Good luck me congrats on your surgery!

I'd tell him soon. If he's still interested, this could be a good bonding experience for you guys and this could make things progress.
Good luck!

There's a forum for that!!!

http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/wls_singles/

Lots of vets there (both WLS and dating)

You are not a Failure, so quit worrying so much about what he thinks about your choice. Simply say what you're doing, and he can go along for the ride and be supportive, or not. Don't make it more difficult than it needs to be.

A Looooonnnggggg Time ago, the Old Sexy Kat used to buy all those women books. You know the ones, "How to Make a Man Love You" "10 ways to Spot a Liar and Change Him", "Why do Men Cheat". Most of us have read some of that section in the book store, along with the articles in women's magazines. Then..... One day I opened my secret cabinet where I stashed my women books and said to myself, what waste of time and space. The new and improved Sexy Kat heaved em all in the trash. From that day on I said to myself, "Let the men buy a book on how to keep ME Happy." Now I make sure to surround myself with people who make me happy whenever possible, and if anyone decides to rain on my parade, they need to go away...far, far away. 

Now quit worrying what others think, and go out there and own your life! The more positive you are about yourself, and your decisions, the more people will see a strong leader and be  inclined to follow you and be around you. I say tell him like you would tell anyone about your future plans and dreams. If he isn't on board, then he needs to move along.

Oh and date ideas that don't revolve around food:
Movie with your shake
Long romantic  walk (bring the water bottle)
Art Gallery/Museum
Game night with pals
A day at the zoo

Enjoy your new Life!
Kat

Sexy Kat, I share your vision wholeheartedly. Thanks so much for letting others see how it is possible to be a strong, empowered and successful post-op with or without a partner!

Just so you know, I too had a book burning party years, and years ago! The heat from those flames still fans my independent lifestyle (it was a HUGE fire ~grin~).

 Thanks everyone!!! I think that's exactly what I needed to hear! I will tell him on our next date. Before I had the surgery scheduled I would tell a guy fairly quickly now it's just so real! Thank you for all your support!! 

Oh that's a challenging one. Not much advice but consider this:

1. If you don't tell him you are going to have to explain why you've dropped off the face of the earth for a while because you will NOT be in any mood or condition to see him (and not tell him) for a while after surgery.
2. You may come across as acting weird when you DO see him. Trust me when I say even when they try not to be, a lot of newbies are all about the "I can'ts." Not all but a good many.
3. You may be a raging ball of hormones after surgery. You do not know how this will manifest. You may be perpetually horny, *****y, weepy, all three at the same time. It's sort of unfair to drag someone into that unknowingly.

So my advice is to either tell him (don't invite comment, just for informational purposes!) or put things on hold for a while so you can get yourself together. Considering the fact that many marriages don't survive this process, it's a lot to put a new and only potential relationship through.