For those who struggle: You are Welcome
When they are fresh out of surgery they post here fervently and seek and give advice. They are very involved and it seems like it’ll always be that way.
Then some disappear. They have lives. They are busy. They got married. They have a new job, a new baby, moved to a new town. They embraced lifestyles they feel are different from the rest of the board or they just seem to have outgrown this forum.
And then some come back. Sometimes just to check in every now and again. But more often than not because they are struggling and need help.
It seems to me for every post-op who does that, there are probably a bunch who don’t. Maybe they lurk here, reading posts, but don’t want to post themselves because they are ashamed of regain or relapse into bad habits. Perhaps they feel that a brief time of bad decision making negates their credibility. Perhaps they think “what can I offer? I haven’t been successful myself?"
I can’t speak for everyone on the board but I do think we share a common sentiment so I’ll just say it.
YOU ARE WELCOME HERE.
Nobody thinks you are a phony because you have struggled. We think you are REAL because you struggled and BRAVE for talking about that struggle. We APPRECIATE your experience and perhaps can even use it to help guide our processes.
And despite what you think, we can also be helpful. We can be ears to listen to your worries and rants. We can give understanding that non-ops simply cannot. We CAN offer advice on a myriad of subjects (although, medical advice should be taken at one’s own discretion). We can simply listen and say that we hear you, which can be very helpful.
So if anyone is lurking and struggling and reads this, just know that, ok? You are welcome. Come as you are.
And in the famous words of AA, NA and all the rest of the “A’s": “Keep coming back, it works if you work it!"
RNY Gastric Bypass 1-8-08 350/327/200 (HW/SW/CW). I spend most of my time playing with my food over at Bariatric Foodie - check me out!
Oh and I am so not perfect...
RNY Gastric Bypass 1-8-08 350/327/200 (HW/SW/CW). I spend most of my time playing with my food over at Bariatric Foodie - check me out!
It takes bravery to speak up and reach for help... but that's the first step in finding a resolution of sorts. It starts with the first step... so if you're out there feeling badly for having fallen off the proverbial wagon or something like that, let everyone help you. While we empathize with what you're going through, it's also good for all of us to read... maybe we can learn from someone else's misfortunes.
Bring it on!
tori
