Semi-OT Ramble: My Body...
This morning I was riding the elevator and I caught my reflection in the mirror. I’m at the point now where my brain is starting to catch up with this whole weight loss thing. The fact that I’ve been in therapy this whole four years (and continuing) is helping also. I think I have a pretty healthy self-image, all things considered.
In that moment of catching my reflection I felt a moment of awe. My body has been through so much in these 35 years on earth. Not just because of obesity. Check it out.
Yes, I’ve been big since I was a kid. Up until age 31 when I got surgery, my body carried around a lot of weight. And I wasn’t sedentary. Mostly by virtue of my lifestyle. I didn’t learn to drive until age 25 and before that I detested public transportation so much (anyone from Baltimore can affirm my reasons) that I tended to walk everywhere. If I couldn’t walk somewhere, or get a ride, I didn’t go.
But here’s some other things about my body that amaze me. I grew TWO children in my body. Two healthy children. Both of my children were “40 weekers" too. So I carried them a total of TEN months in my body each. I had a natural birth with my youngest (epidural dropped my blood pressure so low the anesthesiologist had to manually pump my blood so I didn’t stroke out. Needless to say they had to stop the epidural).
Once born, I fed those two children with milk from my own body. This was no small feat as there were many factors working against me, not the least of which being a prevalent culture of disdain at breastfeeding in the U.S. I got so many sideways looks, especially within my own culture. But I did it. And I’m glad I did.
On a more minor note, I have survived several bouts with the flu. For those who know me well, you know I rarely take medicine. I am the child of addicts and medicine of any sort scares me. Took me some time to wrap my head around vitamin pills but I did. I don’t advise anyone else to take on the flu without medication, but I have to marvel at the fact that I stand here before you today, with no ill effects, even though I refused medication.
And of course, I underwent RNY. These days the scars from my surgery are only visible when I point them out to people and even I have a hard time finding them sometimes. The remnants of obesity are much easier to show. But I am not ashamed of them. They are where I came from, part of who I am and evidence of my triumph.
My body released all that weight. It has been pushed to the limits. It has changed and changed and changed again. And I stand before you today a healthy woman who feels like she’s lived several amazing lifetimes.
I tell you all this to try to convince you to see the awe in yourselves. If you think about people…say…100 years ago. Many of the things you breezed through (or at least survived) might have killed them. And you are alive. You are working toward being the healthiest you that you can be. Your body is doing amazing things.
Take a moment with me to embrace and celebrate that.
J
RNY Gastric Bypass 1-8-08 350/327/200 (HW/SW/CW). I spend most of my time playing with my food over at Bariatric Foodie - check me out!
Sandy
HW 225, SW 219, GW 140, CW 124
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!
