OT- suggestions for stopping negative self-talk?

From what I've read about replacing negative thoughts with postive ones, the best thing to do is be prepared. What that means is to make a list of all your negative thoughts, and we usually have ones that we repeat to ourselves consciously. For each one, change it into a postive thought. Keep the list with you or post it all over the house. Then when you have a negative thought, look at what its positive counter thought is and repeat that to yourself. Hopefully, with time, the postive thoughts will become more prevalent automatically.

Good luck!
Jan

I hope you are not offended by me saying "I feel your pain" because I have suffered with bouts of negative thinking many times in my life. I think it goes hand in hand with depression.



Because I too experience those feelings and I know how it is never welcome to feel this way. Some people have called it "stinking thinking" others something else.



I've read Deepak Chopra and I think you might be interested in this piece I found on youtube http://www.ted.com/talks/matthieu_ricard_on_the_habits_of_happiness.html . I think your pledge of "mindful" thinking is a step toward the meditation and nourishment of that "still small voice" inside all of us on a daily basis.

I watched the link and it's pretty awesome... thank you so much for sharing it.  Definitely food for thought...


tori

My counselor had me write down a list of things I like about me. After some struggle I came up with 5 things. He wrote them down and had me say them out loud to myself, in the mirror, 2x a day.
I felt ridiculous.

But it became a lot easier to remember those things to counter the negative self-talk. And it doesn't matter if you believe them when you are down, it matters that you know YOU came up with those things, so they are true to you even when you don't feel them.

That may sound like nonsense... my counselor says it so much better lol

 I had about a decade of therapy for weight unrelated issues.
I did the inspirational quotes on the mirror. The diary of feelings and the write 5 things about yourself.

Then one day it finally sunk in. I realised when I was being critical with purpose and when I was just tearing my self down. I had to push all the problems that weren't mine to back onto the people they belonged to.

I became a bit meaner and a lot more selfish. True sometimes I mourn the nice me, but I don't like ripping myself down anymore. Once I realized that it did still really hurt when someone said or did something mean, it really seemed pointless to 'say it to myself' first. I'd rather have the fleeting moment and one night of tears/shame over a jerk rather than an eternal loop of it from myself ad nauseum. 

Funnily enough, it was a lot easier to ignore or soften the jerks hurtful actions after I stopped reinforcing them.

I have a card on my mirror that I see everyday that reads "you are beautiful". I went on a trip and was called a hottie for the first time in my life. I added it to the card. When I am feeling down and want to start self-hating I think of or see my card and try to talk myself up rather than down.

 This topic is basically what I do every day. For others, mostly - and sometimes for myself!

Short answer: google "CBT + negative self-talk" or "REBT". You got the general form of changing negativistic thinking: identify the thought & replace it. But it goes much further than that. We have all sorts of classifications of irrational thoughts because they serve a purpose. Tricky thing is identifying that purpose and finding a satisfactory alternative. Positives may not feel true, certainly at first, but if you can find a thought that is more NEUTRAL or RATIONAL, that may be a better first step. 

BTW, I'm giving up clothes shopping for Lent. Yeah, forty days of restricting my compulsion to shop. Let's see what other type of mess I can get myself into.... ha haha!

 This is an interesting conversation and I never thought about negative self-talk.  I know people who are always in a crisis and focusing on themselves.  Nothing anyone says can bring them out of it so I think it must be an internal issue.  

When I was in my twenties I started to hear myself, when looking in the mirror, brushing my teeth, etc., say " I'm the luckiest person on earth."  It wasn't a conscience exercise, it just popped out. When I was at my highest weight, I still saw the skinny girl I was in my 30's.  So, I'm getting the skinny look again and I'm thrilled to be getting the energy back and I can't imagine being depressed over it.  At the same time I know that those who are can not be blamed for how they feel...it must be hormones and chemistry.  I hope everyone can find peace within and enjoy a full and healthy future.