Do you know how important YOU are to this board?

This might seem like overstating the obvious, but I really wanted to write you guys a note to say that we ALL bring unique gifts to this message board. Whether you are pre-op, a new post-op, in your bariatric adolescence or a long-term post-op, you each have something to share with this community. From my perspective here are just a FEW of the gifts we each bring:

 

Pre-ops: for me you all bring the new information that you get from your surgical staff before your surgeries. After surgery, sometimes your head is so in the game that you don’t pay attention to the latest information, research, etc. When you guys ask questions about things you’ve heard it teaches me new things, makes me think and challenges me. You guys are a great source of the latest information on WLS>

 

New post-ops: You remind me of where I came from in more ways than one. Yes, you guys tend to freak out (a lot) but your fervor for success inspires me every single day. You guys are “hungry" for success, determined to follow the rules (even though most of the time you guys seem to think you’re not doing so) and that energizes me. The rules pretty much remain the same throughout post-op life, but long-termers can “forget" that as our bodies start to more closely resemble a non-op body than a post-op. You bring me back to the fact that long-term success requires dedication and I draw a lot of encouragement from you guys.

 

Middle-aged post-ops: You guys are wrestling with some BIG stuff. For many, your weight loss has either slowed or stopped and now you’re in the “now what?" phase. It’s hard because this is the point where that newbie dedication can either help you or fail you. The questions you guys ask make me think even more deeply about the mental process of this thing. It’s a lifelong battle. It doesn’t ever “end" I’m afraid. And you guys sustain me to do battle each day against this thing called food addiction.

 

And my fellow long-termers (if I’m even allowed to include myself in that group): You all are where I am. Many of you are further out than me and have already been where I am. Despite the fact that I THINK I know everything, I don’t. I love you guys for challenging my notions, putting me in my place when needed and understanding that my issues are quite different from someone brand-new in this process and lending your experience to help talk me off the ledge.

 

So I just wanted to tap that out while I was thinking about it. There is a reason this community is popular and it works. We each have something to bring to the table and we do, each and every day. This place is very important to me and I think it may always be.

 Nik, this post nearly brought me to tears! (maybe because I fit in the "middle-aged" category? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! I can't be middle-aged!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! )
OK, Seriously, it's great to reflect on how we all make this board a great place.

I liked her term "bariatric adolescence" better!!

I know I am good for a laugh every now and then!

It is because of you that at LEAST once a day I think the following:

"BY THE POWER OF GRAYSCULL...I...HAVE...THE POWAHHHHHHHHH!"

But I don't have a sword. Yet.

... my brother's nickname for me is 'Teela', as he always considered me like the female warrior from the He-Man cartoon.  This was always one of my favorite quotes, too....


tori

I agree with everything you wrote, Nic.  We each bring something to the table (pun intended) that keeps us inspired and challenge to keep going.

I've learned allot from the boards as things change and the medical community gets a better handle on long-term WLS statistics, results, and needs.

Kudos to all for being a part of this journey to good health!

You know, sometimes it is hard to want to offer help or support when your posts are ignored but the same people who offer the same advice are raised up to the level of high priestesses or priests.  I like to think that even though I am a pretty new post op, the fact that I have lived with WLS for over 9 years and have learned a lot from my experience, including a boatload of things not to do, gives me some value but every time I go to answer a post the same people have already beaten me to it.  It feels useless to even try.
Don't get me wrong, I have learned a lot from those people, too, but if I feel useless in terms of offering support or that my own experiences are valueless then it makes me less likely to participate.  I like to hear all voices, not just one or two.

Just because I am who I am I need to challenge that (and by “I am who I am" I mean a smartass who challenges things).

 

You mentioned a few things here that stick out to me. Firstly, the concept of people being elevated to a certain level. While I can attest that this does happen, I think this board values everyone’s opinions and perspectives. The “cool kid" (as I think Lora calls it) is a fleeting status and very much dependent on participation. I know I have had several absences from the board, during which time people came on who never knew me and so when I post it doesn’t mean squat to them. But let Kelly post… (wink)…omigosh!!!

 

But I think that’s natural. There will always be people who speak up loudly and first and those who hang back. Which brings me to a second point.

I hope there isn’t the feeling that there is a competition in “getting to" people’s posts first. If you see that several others have already responded, I hope you won’t let that stop you from responding too. I’m sure you probably wouldn’t say exactly what I would say just as I wouldn’t say exactly what someone else says. But having all our voices is important. Sometimes especially important in dispelling myths about long-term post-op life.

 

So all that is to say, we’re a community and in communities there will be showboats (lowers eyes shamefully), but I’m hoping our community is one that values all voices and perspectives. Is that idealistic, do you think?

Thanks Nik!
I don't feel the need to respond to every post, only the ones that I feel I can be somewhat helpful with.  If I see that someone hasn't gotten any responses I try to at least let them know that they were heard and maybe no one knows the answer and that is why they don't respond.
We are all in this together and hopefully there aren't any "stars", although some people have more to offer then others.  It's a good thing there are all kinds around here or it would get very boring.