The view from further out: Pouch Song (a small essay)

I can almost pass for normal. Over these past four years I've become particularly adept at knowing what to cook or order at a restaurant so that I can finish a plate of food (for instance, you'll never see me order a steak or a whole chicken breast at a restaurant. Usually I go for the smallest salad I see with added sliced protein on top).

To the outside world I'm a woman of a healthy size who has a normal appetite. I eat and I leave a little on my plate.

So all this is to say...in most respects if I did not WANT to tell people I ever had WLS, I don't have to. In most respects. Except one.

Pouch song. I define that is the very LOUD noises some of our digestive systems make after eating. I got it very bad early on which I expected. My system was healing after all. Plus back then EVERYONE knew I was having surgery. They had to know. You don't just drop 100 lbs. in six months and not explain that to people. Besides I was proud of my new life.

But now...I am sort of going through "bariatric adolescence." I'm never ashamed of my surgery. I just don't want it to be the FIRST thing I say about myself to people. If and when it comes up, it comes up. Until a few months ago that worked too.

Until the pouch song came back.

I was on a date. At a movie with a guy. THIS TIME I think I know why it happened. I hadn't eaten before the date. He got popcorn. I declined but got a diet soda. Took a sip (I'm not really a diet soda fan...I was always of the school that if I couldn't drink regular soda I'd rather not drink it at all) and five minutes later.

"URRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH...."

He looks at me. I smile weakly, trying to hold in my gut to make it go away. This, I knew, would be fruitless. It happened again. He leaned over. "Are you hungry? My gosh..." I think he felt guilty for not feeding me before the movie.

In this instance it was ok because the surgery had come up in coversation so I simply replied, "Nope. That's just one of those weird things about my system" and left it at that.

But it's embarrassing. It happens in meetings and at my desk. When I'm at appointments and in social interactions. I don't understand the rhyme or reason behind it. Right now as I type I'm having pouch song because I took my vitamins.

Sigh...it's my own fault really. If you read Bariatric Foodie, all my Survival Guides teach you to fake your way through food situations without having to answer questions about yourself. I was brazen enough to believe those days were over for me.

But I guess it's my pouch, literally, that will have the last laugh.

That is all.

I need that survival guide to fake my way through food situations.  Monday, my husband and I are having dinner with friends and I am scared the cat will come out of the bag.  I've not told my friends in my new city that I've had surgery and don't plan to.  I had lunch with a friend a couple weeks ago and she went on and on about how little I ate.. ugh  I ordered a chef salad and ate half of it.

I don't have the gurgle you refer of but I do have an embarrassing hiccup/burp at the end of every meal.  My clue I'm full, I guess.

Here's the link to the guides.

http://bariatricfoodie.blogspot.com/p/about-pouch-party.html

For your particular situation I'd say to eat your protein before you go and stick to soup or something of the like for dinner. That worked for me early out if I didn't want to discuss my surgery around the dinner table. And order an herbal tea when you first get there. The waiter will leave you alone about your water glass and so long as you take a good sip of it and leave it half full, people sort of just assume you're drinking it.

See? This is like a sport for me. But Pouch Song? I can't hustle my way around that very well.

Good idea, thanks for the tip.
I appreciate all that you contribute to this site!

Mine does it too.  I just assure people I'm not hungry and tell them "My tummy is weird that way.  Sometimes it has lots to say."  It can be embarrassing.  I'm not dating since I'm already in a relationshp (and trust me, he makes weird noises around me, belches and farts, all that stuff guys do once they are secure in the relationship) and I don't work outside the home so I'm in fewer situations where it would be really embarrassing.  But it can be amazingly loud.

 Another good post!!

I am glad it is normal being a newbie I am Learning so much,mine is so random,it seams to be More about how much and not what I eat,If I have just one bite too much it will start,it can last for two hours sometimes,and after a while gets quite painful!!