Need a non-weight related pep talk
For those of you who do not know, I am working on a doctoral dissertation in Psychology. I am ABD (All But Dissertation), so all of the coursework is complete... which means that I have already invested tens of thousands of dollars and tens of thousands of hours in this endeavor. I have ZERO motivation to work on this research, however. Normally, I really enjoy research and writing papers... and I stopped seeing clients (evenings and Saturdays) so I would have the time to devote to it... but I find myself NOT working on it.
Some of it is holiday depression, which alway****s me in Nov/Dec and again in April (trauma "anniversary"), but I was having trouble forcing myself to work on it before that. Some of it is the economy... where I live the job prospects for PhDs isn't much better than for Master's level counselors. Both are pretty abysmal here. I am SO close, but am SO sick of working full-time, taking care of dogs, house, and yard by myself, and studying. I thought if I took a break for a month or so, I would re-charge myself a bit, so I did that. Nope, didn't work.
I need a pep talk... or maybe a kick in the butt... or... I don't even know.
Lora
Some of it is holiday depression, which alway****s me in Nov/Dec and again in April (trauma "anniversary"), but I was having trouble forcing myself to work on it before that. Some of it is the economy... where I live the job prospects for PhDs isn't much better than for Master's level counselors. Both are pretty abysmal here. I am SO close, but am SO sick of working full-time, taking care of dogs, house, and yard by myself, and studying. I thought if I took a break for a month or so, I would re-charge myself a bit, so I did that. Nope, didn't work.
I need a pep talk... or maybe a kick in the butt... or... I don't even know.
Lora
14 years out; 190 pounds lost, 165 pound loss maintained
You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.
I doubt I can suggest anything you haven't already thought of.
Have you written down all the reasons you want to complete your degree?
Do you still want the degree? I know you think you should finish since you've put so much money and time into it... but wanting it is different than thinking you should do it. If you're real honest with yourself, do you still want it?
If you do want it but are still having trouble motivating yourself, have you tried breaking it down into small goals and scheduling when you're going to do which small step of the work?
Have you written down all the reasons you want to complete your degree?
Do you still want the degree? I know you think you should finish since you've put so much money and time into it... but wanting it is different than thinking you should do it. If you're real honest with yourself, do you still want it?
If you do want it but are still having trouble motivating yourself, have you tried breaking it down into small goals and scheduling when you're going to do which small step of the work?
Kelly
Please note: I AM NOT A DOCTOR. If you want medical advice, talk to your doctor. Whatever I post, there is probably some surgeon or other health care provider somewhere that disagrees with me. If you want to know what your surgeon thinks, then ask him or her. Check out my blog.
I had to think about your question for a while. Do I still want the degree? Yes... and no. Do I think I SHOULD fini**** absolutely.
I want it because (in no particular order):
- I gained some very valuable knowledge while taking the classes, and I know that I will learn much more that will both help me in my own life and help my clients by doing the dissertation
- I can (not everyone CAN complete a PhD... but *I* can (if I can get my butt in gear)... and althjough it will sound vain or whatever to some people, it is like my Mensa membership... it validates my intelligence which is a big part of who I am, my self-image, my self-confidence, etc.)
- One of the things I like about myself is that when I start something, I don't give up, and when I make commitments I honor those commitments... and I want to honor what I started for myself as much as I honor things I do for others
The only reasons I really DON'T want it is that I am so incredibly tired of juggling my life responsibilities (I have been working on this since 2007) and I am very discouraged about the economic/employment "return" on my investment and frustrated by having my primary advisor leave in the middle of getting my proposal approval.
I already have a "plan of attack" outlined... just having trouble starting it beyond what I had already done for the proposal.
Lora
I want it because (in no particular order):
- I gained some very valuable knowledge while taking the classes, and I know that I will learn much more that will both help me in my own life and help my clients by doing the dissertation
- I can (not everyone CAN complete a PhD... but *I* can (if I can get my butt in gear)... and althjough it will sound vain or whatever to some people, it is like my Mensa membership... it validates my intelligence which is a big part of who I am, my self-image, my self-confidence, etc.)
- One of the things I like about myself is that when I start something, I don't give up, and when I make commitments I honor those commitments... and I want to honor what I started for myself as much as I honor things I do for others
The only reasons I really DON'T want it is that I am so incredibly tired of juggling my life responsibilities (I have been working on this since 2007) and I am very discouraged about the economic/employment "return" on my investment and frustrated by having my primary advisor leave in the middle of getting my proposal approval.
I already have a "plan of attack" outlined... just having trouble starting it beyond what I had already done for the proposal.
Lora
14 years out; 190 pounds lost, 165 pound loss maintained
You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.
Those sound like really good reasons to me. And doesn't sound vain. Sounds honest. Honesty is good.
Kelly
Please note: I AM NOT A DOCTOR. If you want medical advice, talk to your doctor. Whatever I post, there is probably some surgeon or other health care provider somewhere that disagrees with me. If you want to know what your surgeon thinks, then ask him or her. Check out my blog.
Lora,
I understand the lack of motivation, however the task doesn't get any easier/smaller when you delay it. You pointed out yourself, you have committed a huge investment in both time and money to achieve a goal, and now is NOT the time to lose that focus.
I have to believe that you would feel a greater sense of relief by completing the task. I would worry, that leaving that hanging over you would not help your seasonal depression. It could actually extend what you normally encounter.
While I can't speak to the employment benefits of getting your PhD, there is a personal benefit of seeing it through. An empowerment that comes from accomplishing a goal, and positioning you in a better place if the employment situation in your area changes.
You can do this. To use your signature line... get up out of the water!
I understand the lack of motivation, however the task doesn't get any easier/smaller when you delay it. You pointed out yourself, you have committed a huge investment in both time and money to achieve a goal, and now is NOT the time to lose that focus.
I have to believe that you would feel a greater sense of relief by completing the task. I would worry, that leaving that hanging over you would not help your seasonal depression. It could actually extend what you normally encounter.
While I can't speak to the employment benefits of getting your PhD, there is a personal benefit of seeing it through. An empowerment that comes from accomplishing a goal, and positioning you in a better place if the employment situation in your area changes.
You can do this. To use your signature line... get up out of the water!
A kick in the butt....
You are *this* close to a major achievement that YOU have done on your own, for yourself. It isn't just a matter of what it has cost you in time and money, but what it will cost you in regrets if you stop now.
You can do it.... you are obviously strong and strong willed - just read your own list of all the things you do on a day to day basis!!!
You are *this* close to a major achievement that YOU have done on your own, for yourself. It isn't just a matter of what it has cost you in time and money, but what it will cost you in regrets if you stop now.
You can do it.... you are obviously strong and strong willed - just read your own list of all the things you do on a day to day basis!!!
Is there any fear of success going on? I'm probably off-base on that one, but to motivate oneself you have to remove the roadblocks & you know it's often the ones that we create ourselves that have to go! Don't look at the job prospects part until you get there. I can truely empathize with the "abysmal" part, as I've even considered closing my private practice this year for financial reasons, but healthcare will ALWAYS be an in-demand field. As long as people are crazy, there will be a job out there! Just look on what you can do today and tomorrow - what will come will be.
First ultra: Stone Mill 50 miler 11/15/14 13:44:38, First Full Marathon: Marine Corps 10/27/13 4:57:11, Half Marathon PR 2:04:43 at Shamrock VA Beach Half-Marathon, 12/2/12 First Half-Marathon 2:32:47, 5K PR Run Under the Lights 5K 27:23 on 11/23/13, 10K PR 52:53 Pike's Peek 10K 4/21/13, (1st timed run) Accumen 8K 51:09 10/14/12.
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