I am typing on my phone so i have to break this up into a couple of posts. I went to the overeaters anonymous meeting today. It was interesting to say the least. Everyone is really really nce. I thought it was too structured for me. I didn't really like everyone saying the prayers and how formal that all was. I am reading all the packets about it now and it makes me uncomfortable because it seems so religious. I am not at all religious. Also I felt like just because I was new it made people feel like they could get up in my face and I didn't really like that. I know that is a lot of negative stuff but I have a lot of positive things to say about it too. It is nice to be in a place where everyone understands. Everyone really wants to listen and really be there for each other. About 20 people gave me their phone number in case I needed to call someone and talk. The atmosphere was very supportive and welcoming. I also like that they don't have a diet plan. People understand the diet don't work and you need to have a healthy relationship with food

I think I will continue to go just to see how it works out for me. The plan which is not a diet sounds interesting to me. You decide what it means to be abstinent. Getting a sponsor might be really helpful to me. But I'm just not sure about it. 1 thing that going to the meeting has helped me realize is that I definitely have a problem. I have no doubt that I am addicted to food. Being in a room with other people who are the same yet very different was very nice. So I am going to give it a chance even though I have reservations. I wanted to share with you all about my first meeting. I would love to hear your thoughts and feedback as well as your meeting experiences.

 Your reaction was the same as mine when I attended a meeting.  It was really small, though, only 6 of us there, so I didn't get many sponsor names (only 1 and she was homeless, so I didn't feel comfortable adding to her stress).  I haven't been back, mostly because of the religious nature (I felt like a hypocrite) and how formal it was (made me feel awkward). 

I know a lot of people find it very helpful and I have bounced around the idea of finding another meeting, but I think I will try therapy first. I'll be curious to hear your progress if you continue to go.  Maybe a blog post?

I haven't been to a meeting since my surgery but it's in my future for sure. I'm agnostic, so I know how you feel. To be honest, I take what works and leave the rest. I try to be willing to listen and try new things even if it feels weird because I've found that the good outweighs the bad. I agree that people are really supportive and it's more growth oriented than my surgical support group which is more about just the "facts" of surgery/wt loss/practical issues. My one suggestion is to try a bunch of different meetings/times to see if you find one that fits for you. They all have such different vibes and focuses. I still haven't found the "one" for me but I'm going to keep looking. I'll look forward to hearing about how things work out for you, too.

 I think it is great that the pros seem to outweigh the cons about your going. I also think it is fantastic that you now know that you are addicted to food. It will help you move forward. 

I understand that you are not religious and that is ok you are not there for church. You are there for support. So take from it what you need,,,ie the support and let the other stuff go. If it helps you its a win in my book.

I'm glad you updated us.  I was wondering early how it went.

I think going a few more times is a good idea.  You might want to try attending a different meeting if there are any others around.  Some may have more of a religious tone than others.  I also think sometimes we need to take what works for us and just let the rest go.  I'm not religious either but I was able to deal with the Serenity Prayer when I went to Al-anon because it was only a short prayer and it didn't feel that religious to me, if that makes sense.  You can also decline to participate in the prayer and just step back while everyone else does it if you want to.

I go to a lot of 12 step programs and I don't have a problem with the religious aspect, which I look at as spiritual.  My problem is that many of the meetings spend about 30 minutes reading page after page of literature.  I understand they may feel that the repetitious nature may help us learn but it gets very old quickly.  I am not stupid and I can read things for myself.  I have seen how meetings keep adding more and more things to read until it takes over the meeting.
My favorite meeting, my AA home group, is a lunch meeting that is only 60 minutes long and they keep the reading to a minimum, about 5 minutes or so.  That is my main complaint about a lot of meetings.  I go to another meeting (for yet a different program) where they have a 2 hour long meeting so they can accommodate all the reading.  I get there 1/2 an hour late intentionally and many times they are still working on the readings.

 It is very common to feel uncomfortable in these meetings.  Sounds like your meeting had a very religious focus.  The meeting I attend is small, and most people would say that "god" is their higher power.  One woman, an agnostic, told a very funny story.  She has attended OA for years and has lost weight and maintained the loss.  Actually, she is an atheist.   She finds all the talk of god amusing.   She shared with us that her higher power is a door knob!!!!   I kid you not!!!!  She was really struggling to come up with something and just happened to be staring at a door with a nice brass knob... so voila - a higher power was born!    Personally, I think the process of surrendering and admitting that we are powerless over the addiction is the key.  So if we are powerless, something or somebody else has to help.  Some people make the group their higher power.  Mine is my inner teacher/guide/friend.  It just helps to know that I am not alone, and I don't have to do this all by myself.
Good for you that you are going again.  I've often thought it would be nice to have a branch of OA just for people who've had WLS - because it is the one thing that makes me feel really different from my meeting mates.  But it is still very positive for me to attend.  One hour per week given over to really reflecting on my relationship with food and giving and getting support from others faced with the same struggles.

 I LOVE that story!! Depending on your height, a  door knob may be actually higher than the person......And it takes power to turn it!
Struggling with the religious/spiritual aspect of 12steps can be really a turn-off so it's great to be able to reframe it in a more general way!

 I think it would be great to have a branch of OA meetings for wls patients. One woman at the meeting had weight loss surgery a long time ago and gained it all back but then losts it through OA. I look forward to talking to her more.