losing weight "on your own"

You're missing my point.  My point is not the "eating crap but still losing", my point is that you don't have to do anything special in order to lose weight after surgery intially.

If you hire a trainer and he motivates you to exercise and therefore you are losing weight even though you are eating crap, YOU are still the one doing the exercise.  You are taking some action that allows you to lose weight despite what you are eating. After RNY, you don't have to DO anything to lose weight those first few months, so IMO, as far as losing the weight goes, no, you are not "doing it on your own"... the surgery is doing it for you. 

Now, developing the healthy eating habits, etc., that is another matter.... but the weight loss... the surgery does it initially.  You might not lose as MUCH if you did no exercise and ate crap, but you would still lose weight without any effort whatsoever.

Lora

 Good thread! I guess losing it "on your own" might entail locking yourself away in a mountain cabin in isolation with no food - - but that wouldn't be a particularly healthy way of weight loss.

If that's what it entailed, I don't think anyone would be "doing it on their own!"

Kelly, since I was the one who wrote the post, I hope you'll permit me to explain myself. Frankly, I think it isn't in the spirit of this board to criticize my language in the way you have, but I'll let that go.

RNY provides us with a tool, simply put. We have 12-24 months to use that tool to it's maximum efficiency. After that time period, the tool changes in it's efficiency and we must rely on the skills and habits we have developed during that initial period.

I am here because I could not have done this on my own. I needed a tool, needed my surgeon and my husband and my nutritionist and my trainer. I didn't do it on my own. I'm not doing it on my own now. Perhaps when I am a year or more out I will be able to learn from this experience and operate more independently, but for now, I maintain my position.

It was not my intention to criticize your language at all.  It was your post that prompted me to think about what it means to lose weight on our own, but I've heard that phrase from many other people.  I did not mention your name in my post here both because I've heard it from many other people and because I did not want it to appear that I was criticizing you in any way.  Apparently my effort failed there.

I understand that RNY is a tool and that the malabsorption component goes away (at least to a large degree) after a year or two.  I am more than two years out, though, and my RNY continues to be a tool that helps me maintain my weight.  I still have restriction so I eat pretty small portions and that is a help to me.  If you feel that the restriction won't be a tool that helps you in a couple years, I won't argue with that.  We all have our own experiences and what helps me might not help someone else.

I couldn't have lost the weight I've lost without all the support and tools I've been given, either.  I suspect most people that lose a significant amount of weight, whether they have surgery or not, rely on support from others and various tools to help them lose the weight.  If having support or tools means we are not doing it on our own, then it seems to me like almost no one in the world does it on their own.

Quite frankly Scarlett " I don't give a rats ass" whither or not someone thinks we are not doing it ourselves. They can kiss my furry little (cute) butt if they think adding another tool to my quiver is not doing it myself. It is my health and life I am finally taking control of on my terms and not that banana split's terms. IMHO, I used to care about what others think on my weight. I NO LONGER care about they're opinion only what I think is best for me. Once I made that decision I felt so liberated.

Well, that's a very good point.

I think when I posted this, though, I was thinking more about what we think about ourselves rather than what other people think or say about us.  I think what we say to ourselves is pretty important.  And I think there is a difference between saying "I am making good food choices and I am working hard to lose weight and be health" and saying "I can't do anything about my weight.  I had to have surgery because I can't control what I eat on my own."  I think taking responsibility for myself will help me succeed.

That may not be true for everyone and I am not trying to speak for everyone or critcize anyone that does not think like this.

I HAVE  SAID NUMEROUS TIMES "ON MY OWN" but the way i am trying to express myself with those words is . all by myself. with help other than surgery . i am angry that i could not stick to a exercise and healthier way of eating . i will admit that when  i did the atkins. the zone, the south beach. i was letting others tell me how to do it . but there have been times i just got frustrated with myself and i have lost weight without help from anyone. i just walked 5 miles a day because i strived for it . i also watched what i ate without help from any diet garu.... i figured it out on my own and on my own . so yes i can def say i wish i couldve done this on my own without surgey without a diet book. without someone telling me how to exercise . at one piont in my life i did lose 70 + lbs on my own ...but i never kept it off. so i need help. so this time i def are not doing it on my own . i need surgery or i will die . medicines made me gain weight and my weight makes me hve high blood pressure . and i cant walk because my ankles and feet swell. i have to take this medicine and the only way i can get off it is to lose weight . so im between a rock and a hard place . but YES!! i have done it on my own before . just me,myself, and i ....... i need help .  

I enjoy reading your post so much.