OT: online dating sites

I used Match and Chemistry.  Went out with some toads, made some great friends, learned a lot, and met the man I am now living with!  Met my prince.

I met my significant other online and we have been together 3 years. No marriage yet, because that is what we want, but who knows, that may change one day! (we are both over 50 with grown kids).  I actually preferred meeting online rather than say at a bar or club. For one thing, you have to do a profile so one should tell the truth. If you meet someone who said one thing online and then something different once you meet or talk, then beware! With a guy I met not online, he parrotted everything I said I liked and I knew no better. (turned out he liked nothing I did, he just lied!). My experiences were all similar--we chatted via emails first, then did the yahoo msg chat. Most of the guys gave me their number and said if I would like to talk to them to call. It put the ball in may court which was really comfortable. First dates were usually at Starbucks--I never wanted to do more than just a casual drink--never a full dinner at first meeting. I also did them right after work, weeknight. That way, if things did not flow smoothly, I could exit, as could he, graciously.  I am sitting here smiling because I remember Kenny, my guy, asking if he could pick me up and I politely told him, no thank you, I would drive myself!  And the small world New Orleans is, turned out he had been friends for years with a good friend of mine that I had not seen in a while. And FYI, I met him on a site called plenty of fish!!  cute, huh?

Good luck!!

 I love Plenty of fish! I met my ex there- best man Ive ever met in my life. Im giving it another go around now and getting some good bites... :)

Id love to try one of those sites BUT Im NEVER good at writing a blurb about myself.

I met my significant other of five years on E-Harmony. Tried several other sites, but had more in common with the E-Harmony site.

I didn't date at all for about 23 years, from the time I had my daughter until she was almost out of college.  I think when it really hit me she was out of the nest, about to graduate and even get married, I realized I really needed a life of my own.  I hadn't dated in so long and when I had way back as a 20-year-old, both I and the world were a lot different.  I started out just chatting, not giving my name or telephone number or even thinking about actually meeting anyone in real life.  I just needed to get used to thinking of myself as a sexual/romantic person again.  Finally felt comfortable signing up with match.com and saying I was only interested in people in a 50-mile radius.  I actually met a lot of wonderful men, had some really fun relationships, made some friends.  I met a few jerks, too, but you're in control.  Don't give your number out until you're ready.  Hint:  if a man won't give you his number at home or at work, watch out--he's probably married and cheating.  Use your common sense; don't meet someone anywhere other than a public place until you have established some context.  My husband and I met through match.com.  We met at a restaurant here in town (he brought me a red rose :)  after we had talked, sometimes for hours, for about two weeks.  At first I thought it wasn't going anywhere, but about a month later I sent him a friendly Happy New Year email and he asked me out again.  We have been together ever since 2001, married in 2005.  He's the smartest, best man I ever met in my life. 

My husband and I met on eHarmony (we actually just got married on June 11th).  I had created profiles on eHarmony and Match.com.  I preferred eHarmony over match because Match.com was only matching on superficial requirements (appearance, income, kids, pets, age, etc).  eHarmony matches you based on personality.  I also preferred a site that required an investment -- I wanted a professional with a career and someone who was serious about finding a long term relationship.

My husband was the first man I met on eHarmony, but I have felt so comfortable with him and we enjoy each other so much and work together so well.  We are remodeling our new house right now and as we were trying to install our new over-the-stove microwave I just kep thinking what a great team we make and how grateful I am to have a companion for life.

Congratulations!  You look so happy -- just beautiful!

 A few years ago I went out with a few guys found on Okcupid.com. It's a free one where they match you based on personalty tests. I think its a pretty good one. Lots of people on there.

I did Match for about 6 months and had a great experience.  Sure, some of the guys I met were total tools but some were really nice guys.  When I started gaining my weight back after doing weigh****chers I lost a lot of the confidence to do it and dropped my membership.  Then one day I placed an ad on Craigslist singles and a year and a half later married the man of my dreams!  (No he's not a serial killer and only a little crazy...but my kinda crazy :) 

I loved my experience online dating because I met so many people who I would have NEVER met before.  I tend to be somewhat judgemental so many of the guys I met would have never passed my "picky test" if I met them in the bar or at the grocery store.  But I'm really glad I got to meet them! 

Over the course of doing it, I developed what I called my list of "Rules for online dating" to protect myself physically and my heart from getting stomped on.  It worked out really well.  Here are some of my more important rules:

-Always do a "date zero" the first time you meet someone.  Don't waste time on dinner and a movie or a longer activity because if you don't like them off the bat you are stuck with them the whole night.  Meeting for a drink or cup of coffee for an hour will give you enough to decide if you actually want to go on a "real" date with them.
- Always meet at a place YOU know and chose.  It's much easier if you can do it on your turf. 
- Arrive first.  This way you don't have to be the awkward one looking for someone you have only seen in a picture.  It's up to them.
- Don't spend a ton of time emailing and talking to them before the date.  This builds expectations which are often unrealistic and can lead to major disappointment.  I learned this one the hard way.
- Keep an open mind.  Just because someone isn't perfect doesn't mean it isn't worth a coffee.  I would have NEVER gone out with my husband if I hadn't had this attitude.
- Don't be afraid to be the aggressor online.  I did a lot of "winking" and emailing people who seemed interesting to me and I went out on a lot of dates because of it.  I have friends who were very old fashined and refused to do that.  Guess what- they didn't go out on very many dates and hated it.


Those are the ones I can remember for now, but I say "go for it girl!"   If anything, it's entertaining!

S