RANT: She will NOT steal my progress!
OH KAILA THAT IS A GOOD ONE!!
Nik;
Your mom has issues. She aint happy with herself or her life so she ****s on others. I was in the same situation myself before my mom died. It was ALL about her and never about anyone else. You did the same thing I did- dead silence anytime she went on a ramble or a spewing of CRAP. There were times I would actually cross my eyes and sigh real big like i was at fault just to shut her up, never worked. LOL
All I can say is- WAY to go YOU for gwtting this far.
Your mom has issues. She aint happy with herself or her life so she ****s on others. I was in the same situation myself before my mom died. It was ALL about her and never about anyone else. You did the same thing I did- dead silence anytime she went on a ramble or a spewing of CRAP. There were times I would actually cross my eyes and sigh real big like i was at fault just to shut her up, never worked. LOL
All I can say is- WAY to go YOU for gwtting this far.
As a single person we make but a whisper, as a crowd we make a roar. A friend.
"I never claimed to be an expert at such matters, but I am an expert at giving my opinion."- My dad
In so many ways, this reminds me of my mother. She has been obsessed with her weight her whole life because her dad always called her big. She never had drug/alcohol addiction, but she overly favored my older sister and younger brother for different reasons. Mine was not your typical "Middle Child Syndrome". It is bad when her adult friends, church members, etc. would pull her aside and ask her if she realised how differently she treated me from them. To add to this, my father favored my sister more than my brother and me. I truly feel these issues caused a lot of my weight problems. Then my mom would go on and on about my weight, yet she never cooke healthy food. We lived on TV dinners and boxed meals.
My mom ended up being a single parent by the time I was 6 and even to this day it was always the "poor me" attitude. Nobody's issues or problems are ever worse than hers. When i had my WLS in June, she came to stay with my kids. I left an envelope of cash for the "just in case" I had to stay in the hospital longer and they needed grocery and gas money. The day I was to come home my kids asked if they could buy me flowers at the grocery store and she said no and made up some lame excuse. She never brought them to the hospital to see me either, which wasn't as big of an issue as it was 45 miles away, but I was paying for her gas so it shouldn't have mattered. She was supposed to stay a few days after I got home, but left after dropping me off because she "had so much to do". My sister never called to ask how I was or how surgery went, never called, sent a card, nothing. My mom called the day after I got home, but it wasn't to ask ME how I was doing, it was to let me know about issues my sister was having. I made an excuse to go, frankly didn't care to hear it. I RARELY ask ANYONE for help and if I do, it is because I need it. Just one more letdown that brought back a flood of bad memories from childhood. Like you, it is like beating my had against a wall to try to talk to her and when I do she acts all hurt and offended and has no clue why I am so upset. OR she will go into the "well I am sorry I wasn't the perfect mother for you growing up, but I was a single parent and it took all I had...." sorry, there are many single parents out there and that gives NOBODY an excuse to emotionally neglect ANY of your children.
So needless to say....I feel some of your pain. By no means did I have to endure the abuse you did and so sorry to hear you had to. But so glad to hear you have risen from the ashes and have become the strong thunderbird that you are and just remember that you and your little divas are all that matters and what others have to say can roll off and go to hell. LOL!! ((HUGS)) to ya girl! You are an inspiration to us all here at OH and like other posters have said, we love and appreciate you here and glad to have you with us!
My mom ended up being a single parent by the time I was 6 and even to this day it was always the "poor me" attitude. Nobody's issues or problems are ever worse than hers. When i had my WLS in June, she came to stay with my kids. I left an envelope of cash for the "just in case" I had to stay in the hospital longer and they needed grocery and gas money. The day I was to come home my kids asked if they could buy me flowers at the grocery store and she said no and made up some lame excuse. She never brought them to the hospital to see me either, which wasn't as big of an issue as it was 45 miles away, but I was paying for her gas so it shouldn't have mattered. She was supposed to stay a few days after I got home, but left after dropping me off because she "had so much to do". My sister never called to ask how I was or how surgery went, never called, sent a card, nothing. My mom called the day after I got home, but it wasn't to ask ME how I was doing, it was to let me know about issues my sister was having. I made an excuse to go, frankly didn't care to hear it. I RARELY ask ANYONE for help and if I do, it is because I need it. Just one more letdown that brought back a flood of bad memories from childhood. Like you, it is like beating my had against a wall to try to talk to her and when I do she acts all hurt and offended and has no clue why I am so upset. OR she will go into the "well I am sorry I wasn't the perfect mother for you growing up, but I was a single parent and it took all I had...." sorry, there are many single parents out there and that gives NOBODY an excuse to emotionally neglect ANY of your children.
So needless to say....I feel some of your pain. By no means did I have to endure the abuse you did and so sorry to hear you had to. But so glad to hear you have risen from the ashes and have become the strong thunderbird that you are and just remember that you and your little divas are all that matters and what others have to say can roll off and go to hell. LOL!! ((HUGS)) to ya girl! You are an inspiration to us all here at OH and like other posters have said, we love and appreciate you here and glad to have you with us!
"When you know better, you do better." ~Maya Angelou~
BW 334.4 / CW: 227 / GW 180
I just want to remind you that you kick @$$ and the fact that you recognize these things is amazing. You are so strong.
Yesterday at lunch I said I was full and my Mom asked me how many pieces of pizza I had. I quickly responded three (instead of the none-ya that popped in my head). My sister was just sitting there. My mother starts to go in on me about how much I ate and my sister looks at her and says - she at the topping off of one slice Mom. Let it go. :)
The only difference in us is that I explained to my Mom that I am not eating down or swallowing my words any more. That if she does not like what I have to say then she can go away. It is her choice. I do try to be polite and yes, I temper what I say in front of her but I don't do it to the point that I am in pain. We shall see how this works in two or three years! The relationship is never easy.....
I wish you well.
Holly
Yesterday at lunch I said I was full and my Mom asked me how many pieces of pizza I had. I quickly responded three (instead of the none-ya that popped in my head). My sister was just sitting there. My mother starts to go in on me about how much I ate and my sister looks at her and says - she at the topping off of one slice Mom. Let it go. :)
The only difference in us is that I explained to my Mom that I am not eating down or swallowing my words any more. That if she does not like what I have to say then she can go away. It is her choice. I do try to be polite and yes, I temper what I say in front of her but I don't do it to the point that I am in pain. We shall see how this works in two or three years! The relationship is never easy.....
I wish you well.
Holly
GW 180 SW 370ish CW 200 - Size 8 pants and M/L tops 1/4/12
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