Feeling really low... but haven't reached for the ice cream (yet)

The past few days have been pretty bad emotionally.  I'm still struggling with my trauma therapist of 7 years retiring soon and the prospect of having to tell someone new all about what happened (and, to make things worse, she had to cancel our session last week), and I have been stressed out getting estimates and dealing with insurance after the hail damage to my siding (and, apparently, my roof as well) -- looks like somehow I'm going to have to cover half the cost of having the house re-sided --  and then I found out that the man I had been in a relationship with for several years (but broke up with about a year after I had my surgery) recently married an old girlfriend (and didn't even bother to let me know).  It's not that I want him back -- there were a couple of somewhat toxic aspects of the relationship -- but it really hurt that he didn't even tell me that he was getting married.

So far, I have been able to resist the urge to eat the ice cream in the freezer, but I can still hear it calling to me (despite having had three SF popsicles already).  It's just so discouraging that the urge to eat for comfort is still here after almost 4 years. I tried making protein ice cream a couple of times and never liked it, so that's not an option... and part of me doesn't want to give into it with ANYTHING to eat, even the SF popsicles... it wants to kick that demon in the ass... but I don't seem to have enough energy for ass-kicking today. Maybe tomorrow...

Lora

You have a lot going on, no wonder you're feeling down.  Good for you though, you know the right thing to do.  Instead of reaching for the IC, you're reaching out here to people who know the struggle with food and eathing.  What other things can you do besides reach out here on OH? 

For me, white-knuckling the temptations is a losing proposition. I have to get outside of myself by going for a walk, or calling someone, or finding a way to help someone who needs encouragement, or a favor....

Hugs to you Lora!
-Jasmine

Lora,

I'm so sorry to hear you're going through all this!!!    

Lora, we are in the midst of getting a new roof due to hail damage from a storm last summer. Insurance is covering about 2/3 of it - we have a pretty high deductible. Fortunately our neighbors did a lot of the research into contractors and we made the same choice they did. Houses up the street have also needed new siding but we were protected from that - faced the opposite direction, I guess.

My support group Sat. really got into a discussion of how this journey is a lifetime of WORK. We don't get "past" cravings and wanting to eat because of....stuff. LIfe happens. We have taken away the long time coping mechanism of food and we are left to just face the crap and deal with it head on. And this can be very difficult without that crutch....no wonder cross addictions become such a trap for post WLS folks!

I can't comment much on the ex who was married but will say that my current husband (#2) had been asked by his ex wife to let her know if he was going to remarry. Truth is that she was very manipulative, and I asked him specifically NOT to make that call. We didn't need her permission or her blessing, or her presence in our relationship. Logic may say that your ex is not accountable to you for present relationships....but even with memories of the bad parts of the relationship, your heart is telling you something else.

My own tendency would be to go out shopping and buy MYSELF a little gift to "celebrate" his marriage to SOMEONE ELSE!!! (Let them deal with the toxicity in whatever form....)

And of course you know...this too shall pass. Just get through the evening.

That's a lot for one gal in one day.....

Seriously, the things you describe are tough and I wish you well.

I know the point of your e-mail is about how the relationship with food never completely changes in times of need (stress) and NOT a cry for for food suggestions.....

BUT, how about a sugar free hot cocoa with a huge glob of real whipped cream sweetened with real vanilla and Splenda????? Or two?

Lora,
So sorry for a the frustration and anxiety you are feeling. But I have found that if I put my yogurt in my Ice Cream Maker it is really good. I mix crushed pineapple, Greek yogurt and a few squirts of SF coconut syrup. Yummy. Feels like you are cheating. LOL
I hope this helps. You can mix your favorite flavors you like. I want to try a coffee flavor next time.

Lora,
I just wanted to add. You are one of the people on this forum *****ally give of themselves to help others and I just want to say thank you. I read a lot more than I post or put in replies. I just wanted to know how much you are appreciated.
Lindy

 I'd like to second this.

And I'm sorry you're struggling with the ice cream demon.

Caroline

I would like to second what Lindy said above.  While I am new on here and you don't know me, I always make a point to read your posts as they are so imformative and supportive.  I really appreciate the time and energy you give to everyone here. 

I hope you're in better spirits soon. 

~Theresa

Thanks for the supportive (and kind) words.  I ran out to grab a movie rental and then fixed some fresh strawberries with some Cool Whip instead of the strawberry ice cream, so I'm going to watch the movie and eat my berries and then go to bed.

Lora