1 week out... and a little harder than I thought.

I'm one week out from my revision from lapband to RNY!  The first few days are kind of a blur - I actually felt great for the first two days, miserable when they took the pain pump out, thrilled to go home. I've been doing a lot of walking and felt a TON better when I got off the pain meds.  I am finally back in Austin (had surgery in Houston) and am so happy to be home.

Things have, however, been kind of rough - things I did not expect.  

First, I have the most unbelievable, ridiculous, horrible bruises on the backs of my arms from the heparin shots in the hospital (to help with blood clots).  I am not telling most people about the surgery (most people already know about my lapband), and I have no idea how to explain these insane bruises (they are like as big as an apple width wise). I live in Texas and it is so hot already, but I guess I'll be wearing 3/4 sleeves for the next month - the doc said it could take up to 6 weeks for them to go away!! But this is the least of my problems.

Second - my emotions are crazy. I did not expect this so soon after surgery (I've heard hormones can affect things) - but I have been tearful and feel crazy, for really no good reason.  It's driving my husband pretty batty!  I'm on a super low dose of Zoloft, as I've struggled with mild depression in the past, but now it feels like I need 10 times as much. I hope this improves SOON - I am just not myself.  I feel sad and teary, bored, unmotivated, and frustrated. Ugh.

Third, heat flashes. Had no idea that this would happen - my surgeon said this is also likely hormone related. Yesterday I was sweating so much that I carried a towel with me to mop my brow and face.  I have had a few instances of night sweats too - ugh!!

Fourth, and probably the most frustrating- I am struggling with food.  I am not "hungry," per se, but literally every kind of food sounds amazingly appetizing.  I'm not really tempted to do anything stupid, but I feel pretty awful every time i have to drink protein or broth and find it a huge challenge - all the liquids now seem completely unappetizing.  My husband is generally wonderful and supportive, but he is not changing his eating one bit, and that is tough.  He lost 150 lbs all by himself 10+ years ago and has kept it off, and he truly eats what he wants.  Last night he ordered pizza.  I almost died of jealousy and went to the other room while he ate to avoid the smells.  It made me want to cry - why do I want food?  I thought I wouldn't have cravings!  I know (cognitively) that this is not how it will be forever, but I am really struggling.  I will be on purees on Monday, and I'm hoping that that will be somewhat better.  Every food on TV, in commercials, everything - sounds good. I was never ever like that before - it's awful.

So, that's me one week out.  My pain and gas and bloating are finally subsiding significantly, and I'm going back to work tomorrow, so I'm just hoping that as I start feeling better, this other stuff will fall into place.  Any words of wisdom or advice or support would be greatly appreciated!

Wow, props to you for going back to work so soon! I was out for three weeks. I mourned food. Heck, I still mourn food. There are some things you can do, walking is great, along with reading. I was very glad when I was on pureed. Wendy's chili pureed is good! It looks aweful but tastes great.
Girl, when I went to get my drain out, I cried like a baby in front of my surgeon. I was very down. I struggled a lot at first. After about three weeks, it was way better and I was feeling very normal. So, you are in my thoughts and prayers.
One more suggestion, visit Niks and Eggface site, they have awesome recipes for shakes.

 It sounds like you are doing great for 1 week out! I wasn't even considering going back to work in less than 2 weeks - I had a realy hard time in the first couple weeks. Mood swings & hormonal stuff is very normal. Food cravings are mostly mental, so get yourself away from the things that tempt you - including avoiding the kitchen when others are eating. Fluids & protein are not fun to get down but are necessary to keep you out of the ER and off IVs! It will get better once you're on pureeds, as they feel like "food" more than shakes. I had HUGE bruises on my lower belly from the Heparin & Lovenox - they started to fade around week 2 and healing much better once I started exceeding my protein minimums. Good luck!!!

It will get better. Bruises fade and thank goodness for air. You'll feel better as you get your protein in and fluids. Being back at work after a week is amazing but don't feel guilty if you are the couch potato otherwise.

I also am a revision from the lapband to the RNY! I so know what you are going through if you need to talk I am here. I went through the same thing as you are all those different feelings and things you are going through is normal. I have had the same thing. I am wanting foods as well But i know I can't. So I do the same thing I go into the other room. I have 4 children and a husband and I still can not cook for them:( I hope I will be able to soon. My mom and husband has been cooking for them because I want to taste the food they are having. You are doing great!! I still feel a little dizzy or just foggy a bit. If you are able to go back to work good for you!!!

Hi, I know exactly how you feel and it will get better. I even forget the begining sometimes because now at 7 1/2 months out it is soooo much easier. I really struggled eating in the begining and was very sick of my options. I am a single mom and had no help during the recuperation period so I even had to cook for my 3 kids.... Very hard at the time. I remember after I came home and on mushies, i was in my room kind of depressed and then i smelt chocolate chip cookies in the oven????omg ithey smelt better than i ever remember. My daughter said sorry mom I didnt know you would be able to smell them lol. It gets better each week that goes by but the first 3 weeks was very tough both food wise and emotionally. I still struggle emotionally but so much better. I thank god every day I had this surgery and would do it a million times over. Its is hard but worth it. In time you will find things you like and go from there. I wish I did it sooner. Time and patience is all you need.

I am 6 days out today, and have my follow up appointment today.  I have some serious bruising on my arms as well; not from the blood thinner, those went in my abdomen, but from the attempts at IV starts.  I was on liquids the day before then nothing by mouth after midnight, and I didn't go back to surgery until 11.  I was completely dehydrated and that on top of having rolling veins did not paint a pretty picture.  They ended up have to put a line in through the opposite side of my elbow (where you have blood taken from) and using a "baby needle" after 5 attempts in other places.  Ironically, I work with behaviorally difficult children and get bruised somewhat frequently (not usually like this), but I'm sure it won't look too out of the norm.  I'm concerned of being in a grocery store or elsewhere in public and having someone notice that all these marks are on veins and I must be a user or something.  I will not go back to wor****il at least next Mon, and even then my most aggressive kids are on hold for this entire month.

From a mental health therapist perspective, call your doctor (the one Rx'ing the Zoloft) and tell them you are going through this.  You might need something for a temporary bump.  Don't be afraid to ask for help there.  This is what psychotropics are for.  You might just need something extra for a few weeks.  My psychological issue is I have been extremely bored this past week.  Off work and at home... this is not me.  Not quite mobile enough to really do any house projects, but tired of reading.  I am gaining a clue as to how much down time I filled with food.  Time for some new hobbies.

Not sure about hot flashes.  I think I'm too close to surgery to have a norm on that one.  Temperatures seem to fluctaute and my sleep cycle has been really different, but it's too close to surgery.  I have to wait and see if these normalize at all.

As far as food, I have not been craving or hungry at all.  I even cooked dinner for my husband and daughter the past two nights.  It helps get me up and moving a bit more.  I almost immediately noticed after surgery that foods definitely smell good, but I have no cravings or hunger for them.  This was an odd revelation.  I think for my entire life if I smelled something really good, my body reacted with hunger.  Not now. Can you ask your husband to eat in another room or area of the house for a short while?   I understand the food on TV thing.  This has been part of my boredom too.  I have not been a really big TV person, and I think I've watched every episode of Oprah, talk show, and news show this week.  I try to walk a little during commercials.  I also really don't understand what people enjoy about daytime TV.  I seriously don't like this down time.

Good luck with everything!

--Fran

The head hunger was one of the hardest things for me. That and the realization that almost every single get together revolved around food that I could not eat. I was fine the first few days but after that it got to be so hard that I actually cried because of it. Mcdonalds smelled so good, the fact is I HATE Mcdonalds except for the coffee. As my diet progressed and I was allowed to eat more foods it got better. Even though I was not eating tons of food I was happy that my choices were not limited to broth, broth or protein shake. Now it does not bother me to be around food anymore.   I promise things will get better with time including the hormones. I to turned into a total ***** I have noticed since I started doing Zumba my mood has improved.

My serious recommendation would be for you to not to go back to work for another few weeks!
I took 6 weeks off and needed every day.  I had alot of emotional crazy tearful moments which I never expected.  I had lots of regrets, anxiety, feeling that I was not the same... weird stuff. 
I did end up increasing my zoloft from 50 mg to 100mg after talking with the doctor.  It helped but did not make my emotions/feelings/regret go away. 

This is a tough process - going back to work too soon will make it harder.  I can give you my phone number if you would like to talk!  personal message me and I will send it.

Hugs
:)

Thank you all so much for the responses.

Physically, aside from the sweats occasionally, I really feel almost back to normal.  I've always recovered easily from surgeries - I'm very healthy, my weight isn't super high, and I'm relatively young.  I'm glad it's over with now.

The idea of not going back to work for 6 weeks is horrifying!!!  I have been bored out of my mind already, and it's only been a week!  Also, I have my own business, and if I'm not working, I'm not making money, so it's pretty much impossible for me to take any more time off - I need to start earning again to pay off the crazy amount I spent on surgery.  But, the good news is, I'm a psychologist, and my schedule is relatively light for the next week (purposely).  I generally only go to the office for about 5 hours a day (sometimes less, sometimes more), and I don't do much other than sit in a comfy chair, so it's a pretty ideal situation. I really enjoy my work, too, so I am looking forward to focusing on other people again and not myself!

I now realize that the taste of my favorite protein shake, Bariatric Advantage, which I have used exclusively for 3 years, tastes absolutely horrible to me.   I've been trying to choke it down for the last few days, wondering what I was doing wrong that made it taste like that, but I think it's one of those weird RNY things, where your tastes change!  So, now on to the search to find a new protein drink.

Anyone have any tips/"recipes" for the full liquids stage? It's only til Monday, but I'm honestly struggling.  Also, tips for being out with people?  I can't wait to see friends again, and we have a birthday party to attend this weekend, but everything really IS about food!  What should I bring to drink, or order at a restaurant?