Is it my fault?

I read messages on here and some people talk like the only way your surgery can "come undone" is if you out eat the surgery. This makes me so ! Is it true? Is that the ONLY way? I don't feel like I have done this or at least not intentionally. I have never binged on food. Yes, I was able to eat larger portions and not feeling that full feeling anymore, but I never ate super large portions of food. When talking to family, I have gotten that look - I don't know really how to explain it - but I just know they think I failed just one more time to lose weight, but this time it was my last chance. I feel like I am gaining 20 pounds a day. I hate it! I want to hide ! I am walking on a daily basis from 30 minutes to an hour and trying to watch what I eat AND how much. But, I want that full feeling back and I want what is broken fixed. Rambling - going now. Great to have a place to vent and I appreciate any advice, encouragement, etc. Thanks, T

You know . . . I had a VBG and within 6 months the staple line ruptured. I truly believe in my heart (and my husband can back me up) that I followed the rules. I didn't over eat and I didn't throw up all the time. I kept a food diary and measured everything. I chewed and chewed and chewed my food to make it go down right. I lost 90 lbs, and then I noticed that I was hungry a lot more often and what I was eating wasn't satisfying me. I tried eating things that had more bulk, but it didn't work. I started eating more to satisfy my hunger, and the weight started coming back on. I finally went to the doctor and had the barium test done. My staple line had ruptured. I was devestated. Now I'm waiting on insurance approval to get a revision to the RNY done. I know exactly how you feel and why you would want to hide. I felt that nobody would understand. They just think it's a crying shame that you failed, once again, to lose weight. They will never understand what we go through. So hold your head up. It's not your fault.

We are not failures!!!! When researching my revision almost everywhere it says that it has a 50% failure rate. We just chose the wrong surgery. I can say that I too did not have that full feeling and would eat more. Do you not beat yourself up!!! Hold your head up high and ignore your cheap and tacky friends!!! Good Luck!!! Robin

T - I have to agree with Robin. This is not a failure on our part. I too have been researching RNY surgeries and the failure rate is very high. Most often it is not from the pouch stretching as most people thinking. My doctor told me the part of the stomach that they make the pouch out of just does not stretch. Most often - as is the case with me - the stoma gets stretched or simply quits working. The contents of my stomach empty out almost immediately, leaving me feeling hungry again in about 2 hours. Now it's bad enough to have to fight "head" hunger, but fighting off true hunger pains is just too much to deal with. I wish I had gotten the DS surgery because the success rate is so much higher than with RNY. Those people who like to criticize RNYers that get revisions by saying "we out ate the surgery" just simply don't understand because it's working the right way for them. So don't beat yourself up - just try to do what you can. Wish you all the best.

My surgeon told me that the VBG has an 80% failure rate. Mine lasted just over a year. I had my RNY revision 5 weeks ago, and I am so glad that I had it done. But, because of all the scar tissue, I had to wait long to be able have anything other than protein drinks, and then I developed a stricture. I go in for another scope next week, and hopefully I will finally get to eat something. You can read more on my profile. Don't beat yourself up. You did nothing wrong. It's good that you are trying to take care of it!

You are not a failure! My staple line ruptured one day in late morning when I only had coffee in my stomach for that entire day! Which is why I don't want another RNY. A DS will not fail me like the RNY did.

Thanks, Dawn. All of the procedures are so confusing. I don't know if my doctor does the DS. I am just assuming he would do a distal RNY. I keep hearing people talk about the DS and have read up on it a little. I also keep reading about all of the people who have a failed RNY and are gaining weight. Can you tell me how you came to the decision to have a DS instead of another RNY? Thanks!

I felt the same way. I regained 45 pounds. I thought it was all my fault. I had lost 165 pounds and started gaining after a year. I was told off the record that the procedure used in 2002 did not work. The stoma was stapled. Now he stiches and staples it. Alot of people who had the surgery when I did gained back. My problem is when I started gaining I starting eating alot. I went out of control like the first time. It is only a tool. At six weeks post op I had a stricture and needed it stretched. The Dr. actually found a staple or two in my stomach. Never knew where that came from. Dr. said staple may have went through the fat. I followed the rules and lost alot. So in my heart I knew it wasn't my fault. I thought the Dr. even made me feel like it was my fault. I don't know.