Feel Like A Failure

I never thought I would be a this point. Had a LapRNY in 1999. Everything went great- lost 110 lbs. (Hard work though - tons of exercise and no carbs). Anyway, had an injury - stopped exercising and now three years later (after I sustained my weight loss and had plastic surgery) I am teetering at 200+lbs. This is the first time I've admitted it and like every other time in my life when I've gained weight after lossing it, it must be my fault. I haven't seen a surgeon yet- my original Dr. was in Atlanta(I'm in Fl. now). I've had no work-up; I can eat a lot and rarely dump. Can anyone relate (I see some revisions are from VBG to RNY)- I don't know where to begin and how can I determine it's not me but my plumbing. I'm always hungry. If I could control this......... Words of wisdom? Been here?

Hi, You are not a failure. Same thing happened to me kind of. My lap RNY was in January 2002. I had lost 165. I started gaining. I was not satisfied. Could eat all the time. I went back to the surgeon. My stoma had stretched and my stomach stretched. When I had the surgery my stoma kept closing and had to be stretched. Then it stretched too much. So was it my fault? Was it stretched too much? I don't know. The first step is to see the surgeon again and do what you have to do. Revisions are risky they say. Luckily I made out okay. I've lost about 35 more since my October surgery. It is different from the first time because now I'm not afraid of certain things. I know what to eat. So don't feel like a failure. Good luck with everything.

Kathy, Thank you for your reply. On an intellectual level I know it is not my fault but a lifetime of "diet failures" its hard to rewire the emotional impact. How did they revise your stoma? Ring? Why is there so much risk involved? Because we're not virgins and there will be scar tissue? Thanks again. Glad to know you were a success! W.

Hi, With my first surgery they used staples on the Stoma. The Dr. thinks that is why it stretched. In the beginning they had actually found staples in my stomach. With this surgery they stapled and stitched the Stoma. I think the risk is higher because they need to cut through all the scar tissue to get there. They had to cut my stomach and restaple. I'm not even sure if they took part of the stomach out or not. This time I had a drain in 3 weeks too. I actually still have some pain where the drain was. Not normal but I think they may have aggravated the rib muscle. I see the surgeon in 2 weeks so I wil mention. I think there is a higher risk of a leak too. I was afraid but just knew I had to do it.

Thanks again Kathy. I feel like we've come too far to not take the risk! I know my stomach was transected with double staple lines. I long for the honeymoon days when I wasn't hungry, didn't care about food and was full with an ounce! I thought it would go on forever. Onward! W.

It is truly a Honeymoon period. Someone called me skinny today. Haven't heard that in a long time. I'm far from skinny but it is nice to hear anyway. I felt the same way. Came this far and can't gain all that weight back. Alot of people that had when I did have gained weight. They are embarrassed and don't go back. It's a shame. The Dr. made me feel like it was my fault. I sucked it up though and had the revision. Funny people who had my procedure with the staples are having trouble. OH well. Good luck with everything.