psychology review

                  I am back from my psychology review glad it's over. The lady was nice but she dived into every part of my life from birth on relationship with family , friends food life religion and marital life. I decided to put it all out on the table 100% honesty. I kind of felt good when I left opened up about my life. The lady said she would recommend surgery and she thinks I need counciling after surgery to deal with stress of diet and surgery and stress of being a full time caregiver to my wife. One step closer to surgery can't wait

Congratulations on being one step closer. Counseling is never a bad thing and as a caregiver a "helping hand" is never amiss.

Thank  you , how are you doing everything ok? Hope so

I am fine thanks Joe. Must admit I am missing the warmer weather for my daily walks. Just got a "new to me" treadmill to help with exercise over the winter. So glad you got the recommendation for surgery and hope your wait is not too long now. Do you have help lined up to care for your wife around your surgery time?

Yes her mother said she will help. I am trying to get her back to medical day care but her Dr. Fooled with her rxs so now her anxiety attacks and her chrones is acting up again. I just can't winbwith her Dr. I am going to accept any counciling after surgery they will give me. Between my diet having surgery and carding for my wife I will need someone to keep me thinking right.

    I use to like winter but no more. I hate being inside and the cold weather kills my hips and knees. Are you OK you able to deal with all the stress in your life. You doing anything special for the holidays hope you can get some enjoyment from them. I will let you go thanks for writing always happy to hear from you

 Joe

Sorry your wife is having those issues. I hope you can get her back into adult day care. Our local one is also a children's day care. Seems the population works well together.

I am glad you have an offer of help. You both need and deserve it as you recover and adapt to your new life.

No special holiday plans here beyond Christmas Eve with our son, DIL and their little girl. We do gifts and a simple meal of soup. It has been several years since I was really able to get into the spirit of the holiday the way I did when I was younger.

No idea where you are located and thus how severe your winters are. I am in the mountains of SW VA. I too dislike winter more and more as I get older.

Any idea of when you might have your surgery yet?

Always nice to hear from you.

We live in Baltimore we are getting cold and warm back to cooler weather. I hate winter I count the days to spring. I know the snow and the ice will come I gust hate it.  We don't do much for christmas most of the time my wife could care less about decorations or tree. We will have a simple Christmas meal my wife me and my mother in law. IIt I'difficult times keeping my mine where it belongs. We found out a few weeks ago our 44 year old son has recital cancer. He seems to be getting good care he is inin. Roanoke VA. he has started chemo all we can do is pray.

         Have you reached your goal weigh  I hope you are doing OK with your lifestyle change. I will let you go always a joy

Joe

Yes I  remember now that you said you are in Baltimore. Weather there is not much different to here. I am sorry to hear about your son. He lives about an hour from us! I have a girlfriend who had rectal cancer and she did very well. She had radiation. I hope your son does as well. I guess you don't get to come down and see him.

I understand what you mean about a spouse that is not interested in Christmas or probably much of anything. Mine is only a hair above that. It is so hard to enjoy our lives when our spouses are that way. Also after caring for them there isn't much energy left for doing fun things too often. Does your MIL live with you?

I never had a goal to reach, did not set a weight goal. I said I would be happy to be healthier! I did not have the same type surgery you are waiting for. I had gastric plication. The weight loss is slower and there are varying opinions on if you can lose a lot with that surgery. In europe it is a very popular surgery and their reports on it are far more positive than what you see here. I have lost 50 lbs, 10 of that before surgery, and it will be OK if I don't lose more. I would like to lose another 20 if I can. Right now I am stalled but I have not been walking as much as I usually do due to the weather. Just got a "new to me" treadmill to make walking in the cold weather easier. At 64 I don't want to be skinny and super wrinkly. Nor do I believe I could eat that little all my remaining life to stay that way as at some time activity will fall with age (if I live that long). I did not want a more invasive surgery especially because it would require longer recuperation and I have no help with my husband or household responsibilities. I  wanted surgery 5 yrs ago and my husband was not keen on it and his Drs who he spoke to about it did not support the idea. Finally this year I told him I had spent the last 4 yrs taking care of him and now I was going to take care of me. To my surprise he seemed to understand that and has been very supportive.

Hope you have a great day.

 We might try to come down this spring to see my son a small chance. I know I let my health go I came to understand ifI did not care for me there was no one to do so. Maybe this surgery will get me healthy enough to keep my wife out of a nursing home. She was in a rehab center for a month in Feb. it was the Pitts don't want that again. They told me I was not able to care for her took the decision out of my hands. We both want the best for our spouces  we have to do what we have to do. At 65 my Dr. At first was not crazy about doing surgery but now he is in with it. My wife is coming around slowly she doesn't seem to think I am going to loose weigh and leave her anymore. I understand when you care for someone they fear being alone put inma home. My wife watches too much Dr Phil

      I will let you go I have to have a few obsean words with my wife's Dr office

     I will talk to you later

Joe

If you make it down next spring and stay a little while who knows maybe we can meet for coffee.

Glad your wife and your Dr are closer to being on board. You need support not negativity. I guess it must be hard for your wife with her disability and fears. Can she walk or do anything for herself? My husband can do a lot but is getting more and more forgetful and confused. He can walk a little way. He can drive if I am there to read signs to him. He can't focus on the road and the signs at once. I am not sure that will last much longer. We want to do some traveling and in truth I don't feel able to do all the driving and cooking, cleaning in the RV etc. So we will do what we can before he can't drive at all.

Like you I want better health to be able to care for him as long as I can. Like you I also was not taking care of myself. Time for us both to follow a better path.

If an not being to nosey (don't answer if I am) what kind of weight loss do you hope to achieve?

Going out for a while now it has stopped raining.

Later.