how do you handle the not eating

 I am getting ready to get a revison from lap band to Rny and my big fear is wondering how you handle not being able to eat like you where used to and how much do your emotions play on you over the whole food issue. That has only been my whole social outlet for many years with friends and family. Also food has been a great comfort to me also. I feel like I will be losing my life once I have this surgery. I know that sounds pretty crazy  and I understand the issues with food but how doi you replace the food. I also am feeling that I may not realize just how much of a change this will be. I do understand I will never be able to eat like I used to but am feeling like I will never be able to eat again. Is all this normal thinking?

I remember feeling the same way.  I thought I would never be able to enjoy eating out again or going to social functions.  All I can say is that it does get better.  The first few months were difficult because I could eat so little it seemed a waste of time to go out to eat.  I finished way before everyone else and I had to sit there and watch them eat.  After a while I was able to eat a bit more and it took me longer to finish my meal.  
Now I don't even have to think about it.  I go out to eat pretty often and also go to social functions without a problem.  It is my new normal.  I choose high protein foods and avoid refined carbs and fried foods.  There is always something I can eat.  I have even gone to buffets.  The difference is my life doesn't revolve around food any more.  It is still pleasurable but without the guilt I used to feel all the time.
As far as dealing with emotions without food, that is something I struggled with in the beginning, too.  I went through a period of depression because I had lost my coping mechanism.  Gradually I began to find other ways to cope.  I recently started riding a bike and that really helps me when I feel the need to escape.
There will be a grieving process.  No doubt about it.  But as you learn new coping skills and begin to feel better about yourself you will find you are stronger then you realized and you will gain even more pride in yourself for losing your dependence on food and overeating.  You will feel freedom and realize you aren't tied to food any longer.  You can go anywhere and do anything without worrying about what you will eat or will there be enough for me.  You will look at activities that used to centered around food differently.  I went through the holidays this year for the first time without food being the focus.  Instead it was my family and enjoying their company.
Things will be different but you will get used to it.  After a while you will look back at your former way of life and be glad that you have changed.  There is a lot more to look forward to then wondering where you are going out to eat.

 Thank you so much for your reply. Everyone always talks about how great it is to lose weight but I don't see much about the emotional end of this whole wls . I think most of my fear is that I feel like I won't know who I am with out the food. I am prone to depression so I am worried about that.  Is there anything you regret about doing the surgery? I know I am so sick of the whole eating deal tired of thinking and worrying about food,. I almost feel it would be easier not being ablew to eat.

Have you thought about counseling or maybe OA?  It really helps to address our eating issues.  I never did that with my first surgery and I regained.  This time I wanted to look at why I overate and make changes in the way I handled things.  It is a long process but worth it in the end.  But I always have to be aware, and I have my history to prove it, that no matter what I do I can always go back to my old way of eating if I am not careful.  I am not "fixed" by any means.  I am just enjoying a daily break from my old way of eating as long as I stay on top of it and never forget that as much as I feel normal, I am not.
As far as regrets, I am only 1 year out so it really is too early to tell.  Talk to people at 5+ years to get a real picture.  Most people love their surgery at 1 year out, especially if they have lost a lot of weight.  I was thrilled with my first surgery at 1 year out.  I maintained a pretty normal weight for about 5 years and thought I had things licked.  I had side effects but it was worth it to me to be a normal size.  Hell, at that time it was worth nearly anything not to be morbidly obese.  Now my priorities have changed and and it is more important to be healthy and take care of myself.  Right now I am complication free but I know that things can change if I don't do what I am supposed to do.
As far as it being easier not to be able to eat, it may seem that way but it really isn't easy.  For me though, it is easier not to eat junk and refined carbs then it was to try to eat them moderately.  I was never able to pull that trick off, although many do.  It takes a lot of self honesty to know what we can and cannot handle.  I don't miss having sugar or bread at all, thank God.  I don't feel like I have missed out on anything and it hasn't hurt me one bit.  There are plenty of things that I can eat so I am never deprived.

Have you considered revising to the Sleeve instead? It would retain the pylorus and all normal stomach functions, unlike the RNY pouch/stoma combo. This would also allow you a more normal eating style, since the Sleeve rarely causes any food intolerances.

 I have medicare and it doesn't cover the sleeve. 

Which SUCKS. Sorry---hopefully this will change SOON.

It does cover the DS though, have you considered that? It's not right for everyone, but it does allow a more normal eating style. While sugar and carbs are typically an issue, the issues are gas and bowel related, so while it may be embarrassing it isn't life-threatening. If you really need a donut, you'll eat one at home. And then you may or may not want one again.

Make sure you weigh every single option before you make a final decision.

Then choose your doctor based on the surgery you're having.

If you haven't given the DS full consideration, you are not able to give fully informed consent to surgery.  I wouldn't personally EVER consider an RNY, and I don't mourn food one bit, because I eat very VERY well.  High protein, high fat, and moderate carbs.

Why do you say you would never consider RNY? Because that is what I am revision to on Sept 12... Just curious