sad, confused and disappointed in myself. Revison bound I think....
HI Everyone,
My first time here. I am writing this with such a heavy heart right now. I feel like such a failure and I just don't know what to do about this.
I had rny surgery 2 years ago. I did manage to lose 170 pounds. I had surgery when I weighed 525 pounds and currently I am 355 pounds. I still need to lose 220 ish pounds until I reach my goal weight. At this point I just cannot see that happening. My hunger has returned, old habits have crept in. I have not gained any weight back yet but I sure do graze a lot. Lately I have been thinking about having a revison done. I know I could have done better. I could have done everything by the book and exercised more but I didn't. I feel it is to late to utlilize my tool. I mean I cannot eat like I used to. I cannot go out and drink a large coke, fries and a hamburger. I have not gone back to drinking soda but have had fast food. It just scares me because I can eat a lot more than I used to ne able to eat. I am just so torn inside and do feel like a failure. Yes my life has changed for the better. I used to be isolated inside because I couldn't walk to the car without huffing and puffing. I am more active, I can do things for myself. The surgery wasn't a total bust. I just had bigger dreams for myself. I thought I would be in the 180's by now. I have avoided my surgeron because I know he will be disappointed in me. Can anyone relate?
Sad and confused and disappointed in myself.
Amanda
My first time here. I am writing this with such a heavy heart right now. I feel like such a failure and I just don't know what to do about this.
I had rny surgery 2 years ago. I did manage to lose 170 pounds. I had surgery when I weighed 525 pounds and currently I am 355 pounds. I still need to lose 220 ish pounds until I reach my goal weight. At this point I just cannot see that happening. My hunger has returned, old habits have crept in. I have not gained any weight back yet but I sure do graze a lot. Lately I have been thinking about having a revison done. I know I could have done better. I could have done everything by the book and exercised more but I didn't. I feel it is to late to utlilize my tool. I mean I cannot eat like I used to. I cannot go out and drink a large coke, fries and a hamburger. I have not gone back to drinking soda but have had fast food. It just scares me because I can eat a lot more than I used to ne able to eat. I am just so torn inside and do feel like a failure. Yes my life has changed for the better. I used to be isolated inside because I couldn't walk to the car without huffing and puffing. I am more active, I can do things for myself. The surgery wasn't a total bust. I just had bigger dreams for myself. I thought I would be in the 180's by now. I have avoided my surgeron because I know he will be disappointed in me. Can anyone relate?
Sad and confused and disappointed in myself.
Amanda
Hey Amanda!
I can totally relate to being ashamed to visit your dr. I put it off for months because I was so ashamed and embarassed about not losing, I didnt want to walk thru the door.
Then, I started remembering the courage I found to go see the dr in the first place...
THEN, I said SCREW THIS! Im tired of this crap. I didnt go thru surgery to still be like this. I am not the only person having this trouble. If you (my dr) wont help me, then I'll find someone who will. I walked in there this week, sat down in front of him and said...I want a revision. Yeah...I was scared...LOL, but he listened to me and didnt fault me for anything.
We are not the only people struggling. If you dont ask for help, then you wont get it
Pick yourself up and make the call. I'll be here...waiting for you.
I can totally relate to being ashamed to visit your dr. I put it off for months because I was so ashamed and embarassed about not losing, I didnt want to walk thru the door.
Then, I started remembering the courage I found to go see the dr in the first place...
THEN, I said SCREW THIS! Im tired of this crap. I didnt go thru surgery to still be like this. I am not the only person having this trouble. If you (my dr) wont help me, then I'll find someone who will. I walked in there this week, sat down in front of him and said...I want a revision. Yeah...I was scared...LOL, but he listened to me and didnt fault me for anything.
We are not the only people struggling. If you dont ask for help, then you wont get it
Pick yourself up and make the call. I'll be here...waiting for you.
Banded Feb 23, 2009 / Revision to RNY Aug 25, 2010 
Dear Amanda,
You still have restriction. Can you start walking? Just a little at a time and build up from there?
10 minutes the first day and add more minutes every day until you are walking one hour every day.
Please don't be disappointed in yourself, this is life. People really have high expectations on losing weight when they get WLS.
Please make an apt. with your bariatric surgeon. Please go to a bariatric support group in your area. Please start exercising. YOU are NOT A FAILURE!
You have a tool for life. Just stop eating fast foods. Start practicing "mindful eating".
I do care and I'm hear for you. PM me if you want.
I know about regain. I did regain after a cruise and then dealing with the holidays. I went from a size 6 to a size 12 and hell no I wasn't happy with myself but I'm back on track. I have lost 7 pounds and I'm taking it at 5 pounds at a time.
I will always have to exercise.
I went to see my bariatric surgeon yesterday. He was not disappointed in me. Just offered me advice. You know what?
I was eating too much protein. I was getting 120gms. a day, he said to go back to 80 gms.
At one time I was exercising 3 hours a day (not all at once) and taking in about 1700 calories. Hell yes, as we get further out we are suppose to eat a more. I want to live my life. So I exercise. So currently I'm backing down on calories to 1200 calories a day.
It's hard work to keep the weight off. It's hard work to GET the weight off for some of us. Some people just breeze by and at first don't have to exercise. MOST of us do have to exercise. YOU are one of those people.
So my friend, it's not a race. This is for lifetime. Time to work it and you can do it. I know you can. Put away crackers, chips, cookies or whatever you have in your house. If it ain't in your house you can't eat it right??? Detox yourself of bad sugars and carbs.
Get some Atkins low carb shakes, 160 cal and 15g protein, only 2 net carbs and 1g sugar, drink 4 of those a day =640 calories then eat an apple if you need to much, then eat a normal size dinner of meat and veggies. Do this x3 days the weight will come off (but stay off the scale) after that you know what to do. Your body won't be craving crap. It's not the 5 day pouch test because I don't believe in that one and yes...those 3 days you might seem like you are dieting but after wards just eat smaller portions on a small plate...it's always calories in calories out. Rules change for us the further out we are. Good luck! Hugs- Debbiejean
You still have restriction. Can you start walking? Just a little at a time and build up from there?
10 minutes the first day and add more minutes every day until you are walking one hour every day.
Please don't be disappointed in yourself, this is life. People really have high expectations on losing weight when they get WLS.
Please make an apt. with your bariatric surgeon. Please go to a bariatric support group in your area. Please start exercising. YOU are NOT A FAILURE!
You have a tool for life. Just stop eating fast foods. Start practicing "mindful eating".
I do care and I'm hear for you. PM me if you want.
I know about regain. I did regain after a cruise and then dealing with the holidays. I went from a size 6 to a size 12 and hell no I wasn't happy with myself but I'm back on track. I have lost 7 pounds and I'm taking it at 5 pounds at a time.
I will always have to exercise.
I went to see my bariatric surgeon yesterday. He was not disappointed in me. Just offered me advice. You know what?
I was eating too much protein. I was getting 120gms. a day, he said to go back to 80 gms.
At one time I was exercising 3 hours a day (not all at once) and taking in about 1700 calories. Hell yes, as we get further out we are suppose to eat a more. I want to live my life. So I exercise. So currently I'm backing down on calories to 1200 calories a day.
It's hard work to keep the weight off. It's hard work to GET the weight off for some of us. Some people just breeze by and at first don't have to exercise. MOST of us do have to exercise. YOU are one of those people.
So my friend, it's not a race. This is for lifetime. Time to work it and you can do it. I know you can. Put away crackers, chips, cookies or whatever you have in your house. If it ain't in your house you can't eat it right??? Detox yourself of bad sugars and carbs.
Get some Atkins low carb shakes, 160 cal and 15g protein, only 2 net carbs and 1g sugar, drink 4 of those a day =640 calories then eat an apple if you need to much, then eat a normal size dinner of meat and veggies. Do this x3 days the weight will come off (but stay off the scale) after that you know what to do. Your body won't be craving crap. It's not the 5 day pouch test because I don't believe in that one and yes...those 3 days you might seem like you are dieting but after wards just eat smaller portions on a small plate...it's always calories in calories out. Rules change for us the further out we are. Good luck! Hugs- Debbiejean
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