WLS, failure and shame

Feeling like a failure     RNY about 15 yrs ago, I did ok w/ weight loss, but never as good as other ppl.  At the time I was single, my life was chaotic, I was probably depressed and I wasn't supported by anyone around me.  I have gained about 80% of the weight back.   Fast Forward 15 yrs, now I'm married 2 kids, a house, etc.  While life isn't perfect, I do have more support, now than I have ever had in the past.  I also have more reasons to get myself healthy and stay alive ...  I also have a good doc.  My former RNY surgeon was ok, but I think at some point I gave up doing the follow up care.   Also, he was so new at it, at the time, that there were no groups or meetings for me to attend.   No one but my husband and docs even know I had RNY, even other ppl that I know who have had it.  I feel extremely ashamed that I failed.    I have an appointment tomorrow w/ a WL surgeon to consider a revision.  I have been so ashamed about the failure of my WLS, that I had no idea that a revision was even possible.  As I look around the Internet now, I see that quite a few ppl have had it done.  Especially ppl who are over 10 years out.   I guess the point of my post is to introduce myself and to see if anyone else out there deals w/ the shame of WLS failure and what did they do about it?   Thanks  

Nothing to feel ashamed of - you tackled a problem with the best there was to offer and it did not work as well for you as you had hoped.  I had my original bypass over 25 years ago.  I lost and then regained and also felt like a failure and did not go back to the doctor due to the shame.  Big mistake.  I consulted another surgeon in 2007 and found that the staples had completely dissolved and there was not even a trace of my original surgery.  In Sept 2008. I had a revision complete with a cutting away of the excess stomach.  I have lost over 100 pounds in a little over 6 months, feel great, and hope for even more.  My surgeon was very supportive and made me feel like it was not all my fault.  There were a lot of people in my situation - the price of having the surgery done in the early years.  Doctors know so much more about weight loss and the support needed to take it off and keep it off now than they did earlier.  I do not feel any shame now -  I have a problem (the weight) and I am tackling it with every available weapon at my disposal.  Hold you head up and do what is right for you - the past is gone and you have a bright future to look towards.  Good Luck - Janice

Oh my, I didnt realize staples could disolve? Is that because of the type they used 25 years ago? I guess once the stomach heals the staples arent really necessary any more? I am so interested in this...Janice did your docs give you any answers to any of these questions?

I had a similar situation with my 22 year old stomach stapling revision to an RNY last month - I was able to get insurance coverage for the revision because of the mechanical failure - the staple line ruptured and there was no restriction.  This is a common mechanical failure of the old stomach stapling procedure and a good part of the reason the VBG is not commonly done in the US anymore.  The RNY surgeon said there was no sign of the staples - -you do need them in a VBG for the restriction - - I also had mesh from the VBG band embedded in my stomach - another complication. 

Like other posters I let shame and embarrassment keep me from even seeing my surgeon once I started to regain weight.  I just blamed myself.  My behaviors played their part - no doubt but so did the mechanical failure -- in some way I am glad I didn't know about it before - I think its only now - I'm in my mid 40's (I had the VBG at 25) - that I have the maturity,  and have been around the obesity block and the yo-yo dieting enough times that I know what I need to do for my health and well-being and have the determination to do it.  Life is short.  No regrets

Peace,
Rhonda

Embarrassment :( I wish we didn't have to feel that way about our weight or about treatment. 

Thank you,

 

Thank you janice, it's good to hear that other ppl have gone through the same thing and have been able to deal with it.
Thanks :) 

Well you found the right place to gain some support!  I know the shame as I was a lap band failure from the start!  I'm attempting to revise now to RNY.  Weight loss is much harder for me at my age and with my other conditions/meds so I'm hoping this revision will have a positive outcome.  It took me a while to even have the confidence to try to revise as I thought nothing would work but now I have the faith that it will and support is important.  Good luck to you also!

Thank you,
Good luck to you too! 

 Since you are considering a revision, perhaps these two articles on RNY revision options would be of interest to you.   They are from a bariatric journal and go into the pros and cons of each type of revision.

www.obesityhelp.com/forums/revision/3886215/Everyone-should- read-this-Revision-Procedures-for-Failed/

and

www.obesityhelp.com/forums/revision/3886208/Great-article-on-RNY-revisions-from-Bariatric-Journal/

Good luck!

Thank you for the info! :)