Revision Revulsion?

I am admittedly a support group junky!  I decided long ago that I need support groups to stay on track.  So, one of my goals for 2008 was to attend at least 4 support groups a month; averaging one a week, right?

Well, I have reached that goal and even exceeded it in many months.  I hop around to various groups and the majority have never met me before.  Introductions usually happen at the beginning of each meeting and so therein lies my dilema.........

I have been met with shock by some that I am there (having had a revision) and one guy even told me I shouldn't be there because I was worrying his newly banded wife!  Apparently she was afraid that she too would have to have a revision.  .......  I felt kind of like the outsider who didn't belong amongst the magical energy of "....pounds lost forever...."  type thinking!

So, lately I've just skipped the revision part of my story and I tell people my original surgery date and give the name of my original surgeon (who is now retired).  But then I feel like I'm misrepresenting the full story.  .....  Like, here I am...at goal and looking and acting like I haven't had any issues at all! 

Anyone else have these issues with your revision and what other WLS folks think?  Any ideas on how I should handle it in the future?  When people ask me "why"....my standard answer is, "for the same reason I had my original WLS:  for a better quality of life"!

I do not want to give up support groups.  I always leave feeling revved up to stay focused and keep on track!

What do you think?

I just had my revision from lap-band to rny in October- and only my close friends and family know it was a revisional surgery.  My co-workers and acquaintences never knew I had the lap-band, so I chose not to tell them about it, although I did tell them about my RNY. 

I'm not really sure what happened, if I failed the band or the band failed me, but it came down to a choice to have surgery to replace the band or revise to a different surgery. 

So far my experience between the band and they bypass have been totally different.  I think the presence of the 'honeymoon' period is a BIG deal that people with the band don't experience.  I know eventually, it will all be up to me to keep the weight off, but I don't have to fight for every pound like I did with the band.

Anyway, I think your 'why' answer is great- and like it or not, people need to here the good and the bad about all surgeries before they make a decision- they really do.  I wish there had been so many people with band complications when I was making my original decision. 

Absolutely don't stop going to support groups if they help you! 

Melissa
284/260/1??
10/31/08

Congrats to you on your Revision!  I totally agree that people should know the good and bad about all surgeries.  I sincerely believe that the majority of programs try to prepare them for the surgical complications but perhaps fail in visiting the "other" possibilities.  Those with bands seem to battle way too many slips, erosions, reflux, etc. yet their programs tell them that they probably ate something they shouldn't have.  Ouch!  We all have to take responsibility for our actions but knowing ALL of the possible consequences up front should give us pause to consider before we make bad choices for ourselves?  .....  I think those of us on this forum respect our 2nd chances!  We totally understand the value of being compliant and being a good stewart of our tools (whichever type they are).

My dilema of course is being the poster kid for all the newbie's worst nightmares!!!  I represent failure!  I dampen their dreams of the perfect outcome.

But.......I am who I am and I'm all about doing the mommy kind of thing.  I want people to learn from MY mistakes so that they don't have to experience the pain themselves.   So I babble to anyone who will listen about following their program and being pro-active for their bodies!

So, yup, I'll keep attending support groups.  It's one of my passions.  (or some may call it my addiction transferrence?  LOL! )  And.....so many folks have mentored me and continue to help me with my journey.....seems that I need to take a turn.

Thanks for responding Melissa!  Keep us posted on your Rny ride and give a holler when you need some lifelines!  We all run into snags on our journey's but now we know we have to work hard & not rely solely on the procedure to get us to the perfect zone!!!

I would tell the whole complete story. It will help people know the reality of WLS. They need to be welcomed to the real world and stop trying to live in a fairytale.

please keep up the good work to educate people seeking this surgery.  I wish I had someone to talk with in 2000 when I had my first failed surgery of the rny.

Thanks ALABAMA!!
Finding a sounding board helps all of us so much.  Gotta love O.H. for helping us out with that!

So how are you doing now?

L M,
I am soooo with you on that ......BUT.....the fairytale is sometimes the last thread of hope that they have to hang on to.  I just don't want to be the one to usher them through the door of the real world. ......I"m a bulldozer  trying to learn to tread lightly (kind of like my obese brain trying to catch up with my weight loss).....difficult process!  LOL!

Maybe "complete story" in small doses?? 

Thanks for your reply!!!

I have met you and you are definitely a chatter box. It is not what you are saying but the way you present what you are saying.

Think about it.
                                    
                                          

Owning my imperfection! 

I'm all about becoming better so I will definitely "think about it". 

First of all, I want to congratulate you for being able to answer that post from Coconut with civility and diplomacy.  I will not tell you how I would have answered as it might start something that in my current mood; I am FULLY prepared to finish. 

Secondly, your story is just that, yours and don't let anyone, pardon the pun, revise it.  You tell your feelings because everything in that story you own and if people are open and prepared to listen they will; if they aren't then there is nothing you can do about it.  Look there are a lot of us who wish we had known some things before going into this journey and that is not saying that we would have chosen another journey....that is saying that when the "bounce back" started (something I had never been aware of) or the weight loss stopped significantly short of goal then we would have known where to turn.

I am myself am on of those people who believe that you can never be too educated on a topic and am sad to realize that my education was lacking.  Maybe if I had heard from folks like you and not just the Polly-Anna's then I would have known where to go and get the tools I needed.  Then again; maybe not, but you put the information out there and I commend you for that.  Tell your story, you never know who you are helping.