Fears of Surgery and Failure Again

I've gotten the lapband 4 years ago and my weight is starting to go back up.  Fills aren't an option any longer.  I have chosen to have a sincere discussion with my regular doctor about going for a removal of my band and go far an RNY.  Another surgery, going under the knife.  It just scares me.  Sometimes I think, as I'm sure others have as well, why me?  Why was I born this way to handle this weight dilema?  My family and friends love me no matter what, however, they just don't understand it.  Has anyone felt that way too?  It's like guilt, failure, disappointment, all wrapped up into one.  How much longer will I have to go through all of this before I win against this weight battle?  And that's exactly what it is, a weight battle.

Does anyone else go through these issues?  Because sometimes I feel so alone.  I welcome any and all input. I would love to hear other experiences, because like I said, I feel so ALONE.

Thanks.

Donna
 

I was banded 2 1/2 years ago - lost 85 pounds - got terrible and constand reflux - my band was emptied but still had terrible reflux.  Eventually I couldn't hold down any food and my band was removed on 8/20 in emergency surgery.  I had a revision to RNY on 9/22.  You aren't a failure.  I don't feel that I am one either.  The band just didn't continue to do what it was supposed to do for us...

I am very happy that I went for the RNY.  I am just sorry that I went for the band first...

Thanks Marcia.  I will keep that in mind.  It's just surgery scares me, and to go through that again.

Was your RNY open, or lap?  I'm hoping that I won't have to get an open, because I know the healing time is longer.

Thanks again.


Donna

You are not alone.  I also have a band and am going to have revision to DS.  The band just didn't do what we hoped for and that doesn't make us a failure.  Weight will always be a life long battle but I believe it is one we can win with the right help.  If I had know about the DS first I would have had it instead of the band.  We are here to listen and to help.  Hang in there.

I had the lap band three years ago and am scheduled for RNY on Wednesday.  Mine is going to be open so he can remove the band at the same time. Yes, healing time is longer with the open.  I also felt like a failure as I had lost 70 pounds, but then problems started to happen.  I personally do not feel the band is all they say it is.  There were seven of us in my local area and only one has been able to keep the weight off, the rest of us are looking at a revision or had a revision done.  My family also told me I didn't have to do anything, but I don't like the way I am and I want to be healthier.  They don't understand because they don't have to live that life that you do.  Talk things over with your doctor and get all the information before choosing what to do.  Good luck.

 Honey YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE!    The band failed you.  Some of us are just predispositioned to suffer from weight battles.  You are definitely not alone.  You had the courage to try the band and it simply just did not work for you.  Now you have to courage to recognize the issue and do something about it.  You should be praised for taking your health into your own hands and not shamed for how you are choosing to do it.  Those who have never walked in our shoes can not understand the feelings of depression, guilt, self loathing and everything that surrounds the whole obesity issue.  While the ones we love have a significant impact on our decisions, in this case, sometimes we need to do what we know is best for us even if it means going against the loved ones wishes.  Hopefully once is all said and done, and they see how your health and life has improved they will then understand a bit more.  

I had RNY in 2001.  I consider that I was successful at it because it helped me loose a lot of weight. now 10 years later, I had regained some, but not all.  The original RNY failed me because it was only a proximal procedure.  I have since had a revision to a ERNY which shortens the common channel further.  I am glad I chose the RNY and even more glad that I decided to revise it to the ERNY.  If you are going to go with the RNY you may want to talk to your doctor about the possibility of doing a distal RNY or ERNY for better long term results.

Good Luck to you.  Keep us posted on how you are doing.

I was banded in 2002 and lost 35 pounds. My port failed at about two months out. It has taken me until now to truly make up my mind of what I wanted to do. I have RNY this Friday.

Thank you all for your words of encouragement, and I know everything will work for me for the better in the long run.  I will just have to gather enough information to make a good decision for myself, and then go with the surgery.   I'm afraid of going under the knife, and I've read such possitive results from everyone on here, it will be worth it.  I just pray it all works out and that I will not be a statistic of bad results.  I guess that is my biggest fear, which let me decide to go with the band the first time around.  And of course the healing time too.  

This place is great because there are so many others like me that have gone through it.  

Thank you.
 

I was banded three years ago. Lost close to 90 lbs at my lowest weight and started to have complications from the band and thyroid. After thyroidectomy and fills not being an option, I gained about 30lbs in what seemed like over night. I was revised to a sleeve a little over a week ago. I lost 13 lbs the first week. I thought I would end up with an RNY however my doctor said I didn't need such a drastic measure. I hope she is right because I don't plan on having a third surgery..

You are NOT a failure. The lapband is. Lapband was the worst choice I ever made. Two slips, erosion, shredded band, lack of weight loss, pieces of the band embedded in my stomach wall. I could go on and on about what I feel about lapband and none of it good. I had a revision to RNY last August and am now down to a size two and 113 pounds and still losing. There is no comparison between the surgeries. I highly recommend either RNY or DS if people want to actually get all the weight off and be healthy. I am so thrilled with my RNY!