Desperate for support and advise

Hello my Fellow WLS Friends,
I have come to a point I am so dissapointed in myself I don't know where to turn. I have gained 20 lbs over the past 6 months and I have to go to the Dr. on the 20th and I'm afraid of dissapointing my Dr. because I have always done so well before. I have made my Husband happy by gaining what I have because he thought I was to thin. But now I can't stop gaining and my self esteem is going down. I had the realize band done April 28th 2010 and I'm hoping I will get a fill and lots of good advise to get back on track. Any advise, support or just kind words will be greatly appreciated.

Thanks and God Bless You (Stacy)

Oh my goodness, Toby! What an amazingly courageous lady you are! Seriously! You had the courage to confess and seek help from the list!

We all have such shame associated with our weight, weightloss, re-gaining weight etc that we often forget we are not alone! There is nothing we go through that someone else on the list hasn't gone through or at least knows someone who can identify with us. WHat we want to do is curl up in a ball and sink deeper into our shame...

I think you are doing the right thing! You have an appointment to see your Doc. He will not be disappointed at all - he will be PROUD of you because you came in to see him. The reality is, you ahve lost enough weight that you need an adjustment! THAT'S ALL!

Banding provides us with a tool we need to get our weight under control, If we could have done it without banding - we'd have been successful a long time ago. When our band no longer provides the support we need, we eat more, because we can! Your Doc is expecting to see you for an adjustment!

And if he is not supportive - get another doc - ASAP!

As for being too thin - talk to yur doc. As long as your BMI is in the normal range, you should be ok. Sometimes the Hubby is just use to us being chunkier and really like the extra weight we carry. Some are simply afraid we are going to get too thin and become ill. The good news is it's usually based in love

Hope this helps - and remember. You are an inspiration to all of us - both with your weight loss and your courage!

Hugs
BarbaraG

 Stacy....please don't beat yourself up.   I know how very hard it is not to do that when you have gained a little weight.    At least you are aware of it and are willing to do something about it.    If you are NOT comfortable with your present weight tnen go back to the basics....watch what you are eating and portion sizes.   Make wise food choices.....make sure to exercise or walk and burn those calories you are taking in.    I am sure in now time at all you will be back to your comfortable weight.   PLEASE don't let anyone ( other than your doctor ) control what you weight.    The weight isn't as easy to get off the second time around.    Get your small fill if needed and I am sure that will jump start losing that 20 lbs.   Good luck to you.

Hugs and blessings ~~ Vivian

Thank You Ladies these words of encouragement are just what I needed. I guess I need to remember I have all this support on here from my Obesity Help Friends. I have been walking 3 1/2 miles with My Mom, Daughters and Grandaughters. I think I am going to try to go back to the basics at least for a couple of weeks and pray for success. I know I can do it I just have to set my mind to it and stay active on here socializing with others so, I guess that will be my goal for this year! Have a Great Day My Friends

Hi Stacy,
You lost the weight once and I know you can do it again.  Go back the the basics and get back on the wagon and get the mind set like when you first got banded, sometimes we slip back into the old eating habits and it can get out of control.  I know for me it's the sneaky carbs.   I know you can do it!!! 

God Bless!!!

Thank you so much for the words of encouragement and you are exactly right I can do this again I just got to set my mind to it and do it!  Yes carbs are the worse for me. I will be checking back in and keeping you updated.
God Bless You To My Friend:)

I echo everyone’s sentiments here. They are spot on. I hope you don’t mind my additional 2 ¢

 

Ok here is the toughest love you will get .. Yesterday is over and done with. There is nothing we can do about it. Tomorrow is NOW, and it’s time to get yourself back on track.

 

First – remember this isn’t a diet plan; it’s a way of life. So slips, stumbles and falls will occur. What we do when this happens is truly important. You need to get yourself up, dust yourself off, and get yourself to continue down the road to success.

 

What you first need to do is ask yourself “Where did I come from" .. then ask yourself “Why did I do this operation" – basically the answer is because it’s a last resort.

 

You need to realize you are stronger than any craving or any food. It took strength to admit you have a problem you can’t control. It took strength to decide to have an operation. It took strength to do what was needed before and after the operation. It took strength to say “I need help" .. So you have the strength, now you need to call on it.

 

GET BACK TO THE BASICS !! I tell everyone that. Pretend today was day one of the operation and go back to a strict liquid diet. Do this for a few days (maybe a week), then go onto the next stage of soft food then finally regular food. What you are doing it is detoxing your body of the sugars and bad carbs. When you find yourself hungry – eat .. but SENSIBLE foods. Make sure you also follow all the rules.

 

You need to go back and follow the rules that made you successful. You need to have the 64 ounces of NON-CARBONATE/DECAFFEINATED liquid. You need to have your 60 to 80 grams of protein. You need to make sure you don’t drink 30 minutes before/after or during your meal. 

 

What you need to remember is they put the band around your stomach, and not around your brain. You will need to use some self control when it comes to food. If you are hungry stop and ask yourself is this real hunger or head hunger. Asking that alone will probably be an indication it’s head hunger, so you know what to do. Get busy doing something else. If that doesn’t work, EAT – but SOMETHING HEALTHY. Have some salad; vegetables, PROTEIN, etc.

 

I recommend to look for support groups. Look on line to find ones around you. Let me know if you need help.

 

I LOVE that you are going to discuss this with your Doctor. That’s why he’s there. He won’t be disappointed in you. He’s there to HELP you, not lambaste you. You are worth THE BEST because YOU ARE THE BEST !!

 

I would also suggest speaking to a Nutritionist. Many insurance companies allow you to see one X amount of times per year. Contact your insurance company.

 

Go and speak to the person who did your psych exam, or see someone new – but who understands bariatric issues. Again, insurance should be able to cover it. Maybe not the person you originally saw, but someone in your plan.

 

REMEMBER what it took to make you successful. YOU CAN DO IT !! And know I am here if you need me.

Hi Stacy,
   Sorry I haven't been in touch, just got home from a three month road trip for work.  It's going to be a roller coaster ride from here on out and you need to accept that.  It's not always going to be a positive result for you. What you need to realize is that from time to time, a weight gain may be a positive result.  I gained seven pounds on this road trip because planning your meals and preparing food isn't always a viable option when living in hotel rooms. To tell you the truth, I still feel great and I'm not stressing over it. I'm home for a couple months and have plenty of time to enjoy home and my loved ones while I get back on track. 
   Today marks two years since I have had VSG surgery and I have coached four friends through the same surgery to fabulous results on all accounts. Stacy, remember, this is only a tool and in the end, it all depends on you and the discipline within you.  God bless you my friend and have a joyous holiday season with your loved ones.

Tom