How can I help?
I know a lot of the women on this board have struggled with the heartbreak and struggle of infertility treatments and the loss of babies, so I'm turning to you ladies for some advice. Someone close to me has been going through fertility treatments for just over two years now. She has progressed from just hormones to full blown IVF during this time. She just had her first IVF and it took, but she found out today that her levels have dropped significantly rather than quadrupling as they should have. I'm one of the few people that she has really been able to talk to about all of this, but I feel like a walking reminder of what she doesn't have. I was so excited that this cycle worked because she'd be pregnant before my baby arrives in a month and would be able to "enjoy" having a baby around rather than seeing it as more salt in the wound. I'm the type of person who likes to fix things and help, and I feel so helpless in this situation. Is there anything that I can do or say to help? Is there a book or something I should be passing her way that any of you have found helpful in coping with all of this? For now, my strategy has been just being here, but I want there to be something more that I can do to help... any advice would be appreciated! I just wish there was a way for me to pass along some of my fertility!!
Honestly...don't try to "help" with books or anything like that. Just let her talk about it if she wants to, as much or as little as she wants to. I felt like my frinds got bored with me talking about it and so I felt like I had no one to talk to. The most frustrating thing for me was when people would offer unsolicited advice. And it was rough to be around pregnant people, especially those who had no issue getting pregnant (I don't know you history so I don't know if that's you). Seeing babies was the absolute worst for me though. If you want to be really kind, give her permission to feel whatever she wants around you and your baby.
Tina
Tina
Mommy to 2 of the most beauiful little girls in the whole universe and still in love with my hubby of 8 years. LIFE IS GOOD!
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