Am I being a b****?? MIL

My very wise grandmother always told us to "marry an orphan"... she sure was a smart lady!  She just passed away this spring and I'm so grateful that I got to have her in my life for 28 years, my best friend had no grandparents (they all passed away before she was born).  On that note, granparents are not around forever, so our time with them is precious (even when they drive us, the parents, crazy)!  Perhaps you can take advantage of her eagerness by having her watch Sage while you do moving stuff.  Just a thought.  Good luck, just remember to kill her with kindness and you'll win in the long run.

Between what Lexa and Paula have said would be my comment. you need to realize too that alot of if not ALL grandparents call your baby "their baby". its just them, they arent replacing you, its their chance to spoil and be the "parent they wanted to be". Apparently she did something right if you married her son. I dont see her as being controlling, i see her as being "worried she wnt get to see her grandbaby as much as she did before you moved". MAYBE this is her way of saying "hey, i want to see her and be with her and you can go do what you need to do and not worry about a babysitter or sacking your mom all the time with watching her" maybe your mom and her could have a slumber party with her while your out with your hubby and friends.
You need to let your guard down, massively. You said she acted like "sage was hers all day and night"...id say take advantage of it! go do something with your mom or goto the store in peace and quiet. Grandparents are second parents pretty much. YES they can over step their bounds and sometimes they need a gentle push back over, or a good nudge that was induced by a trip. Nothing wrong with her calling her mom, hell we would invite my family with his and vice versa. Plus when my mom and dad were married (he died and let me tell you BOTH grandmothers were a godsend i was 8 my baby brother was 2) theyd invite the whole family, the "whole family" in our families eyes were BOTH sides of all the siblings etc. If a cousin was baptized, the other side would get invited. if there was a baseball game for a league my uncles were on, both sides were welcomed and everyone knew what to bring. My grandmothers would step in all the time with ANY of us, and we never second guessed it. sorry, your hormones are raging and your stress it outrageous, you need to figure out a way to not take it out on your MIL. she is human, and we arent perfect.
hopefully between everyone here you can find a happy medium to the situation.

i can so relate to you. my mother in law is quite a pill and a control freak. luckily when i say no, it means no. i have a feeling when i have a kid i will be even more stern.

I know she has given you grief in the past.  Why not let her take Sage for part of the day so you can do your running?

Thanks for the input guys.  I think you are not grasping the entire situation, she doesn't just "ask" to come over, she demands, throws a fit, sulks and guilt trips me and my husband.  Like when we were moving, we legit we TOO busy to deal with her BS and she was demanding to take Sage to a carnival, by herself.  For one, we do not let her drive Sage places unless we are in the car because she does not know how to put her in the car seat correctly.  And two, she is not taking her to a carnival, by herself, with a one year old who only wants to run around when she can hardly walk (she uses a cane).  Then she wants to know why we are "keeping Sage from her" it's like she LITERALLY spent the entire day with her 6 days ago and is seeing her again this coming Tuesday.  We do NOT keep them from each other.  I just dont like her "demanding" things, calling 7 times in a row, leaving whiny messages.  We said no, no is no.  that's it.  She needs to get over it, she see's hear at least once every 2 weeks, that's more than a lot of grandparents see their grandkids.

My MIL lives an hour and a half away and is nearly blind and can't drive.  We go see her every few weeks and she is too feeble to even pick Ruby up.  There's no chance that Ruby will ever spend significant "grandma" time with her.

My own Mother is wonderful with Ruby but lives 850 miles away so we see her a few times a year.  We have to re-introduce her every time.

I'd really give anything for Ruby to have grandparents nearby who wanted to spend lots of time with her and could take some of the pressure off of us. 

I guess my point is that it's a trade off.