olive oil as lubricant?

 i've never heard this one before. but i was at my gyno today telling her that i want to start TTC. the problem is i have painful intercourse.

it started after this botched biopsy on my labia. it was traumatizing. and since  then...it just hurts and then swells up and we can't have sex. sometimes it swells up while he's in me. its very hard for us and very rare that we have sex. of course this makes me feel less than human. and like a horrible wife. 

my husband has been looking forward to TTC bc he thinks he's finally gonna get lots of sex.

my gyno gave me a rx for lidocane to numb the area. she also asked what i use for lube, i said ky doesn't work. she said not to use it. she said astroglide is better but she suggested olive oil. she says her menopause patients tell her they have a lot of luck with it. i have never heard of this. but its coming from my doc so i'm guessing its safe and natural. but is it safe when TTC? i'm trying to look up info. but no one has any definitive info. someone said it messes up the PH balance in the vagina.

i was wondering if any of you have ever heard of using olive oil as lube.

LOL - Noooo...I hadn't heard of that particular use for olive oil. Usually I think olive oil goes with a little vinegar, which also would not be conducive to TTC, LOL.  I'd THINK your dr is correct, but just wonder...if her menopause patients use it w/o problems, that's fine and dandy...but you're TTC and obviously don't want something that would interfere with that.

Have you tried pre-seed?  It's a lubricant specifically made for couples TTC....not supposed to interfere w/ TTC like KY can.  And you won't be thinking of salads while DTD, LOL. 

Good luck...hope either the oil or some other alternative works for you and you get your BFP soon...and that the lidocane works so the time w/DH doesn't come to a painful halt.  I could see why it'd make you feel bad...and hope he's understanding that it's not him...also hoping the biopsy results were good.  Can your gyno fix the botch so it's not so painful? 

Haha Holly great minds think alike.

hahahaah salads!! and I also suggest pre-seed.  used it to conceive both bebe's

 i thought about that. menopause and ttc are two totally diff things. but she did know i was TTC when she suggested it. so i doubt it will do hard. i might give it a try. do other lubricants kill sperm?

the botches biopsy wasn't with her. it was done while i was living in boston. i had  a bump on my labia. my GP at the time didn't think it was serious but just to be safe she told me i should get a biopsy. NO ONE explained to me what a biopsy entailed. when she sent me downstairs to the gyno of the practice i was blisffuly unaware of the nightmare that was to come my way. i was in shock when i found out what a biopsy was. but it was too late. they took what seemed like a big whole puncher to my labia (super painful) and then they could not stop the bleeding. they blamed it on me saying i took blood thinners. but i didn't. i take tylenol and not ib profen for that very reason. i could see the panic on her face as she tried and tried to clot the blood. i was of course panicking. 3 women were working on me. after probably 5 min the blood finally clotted. then they left the room. they left me shaking, scared, in pain, traumatized. i got myself up to get dressed and thats when i saw all the blood that had dripped off the exam table and onto the floor. i started to cry. i was all alone. i wished someone had come in to that apt with me. i felt so violated and butchered. how could they just leave me there? no one came in to tell me how to care for this gaping hole on my labia. every time i would sit to pee the hole would open up again and bleed. my husband had to apply the ointment (ointment we got an rx for only after we called to see wtf i was supposed to do) and every time he did i cried and was terrified he was gonna hurt me like they did.

it was the most traumatizing experience of my life. and it totally ****** me up. i truly think its the reason i have painful intercourse now. don't know if its physical or mental. 

oh and the biopsy came back and it was just an overgrown sweat gland.

gyno says its vulvodynia. basically nothing i can do about it. my husband is very understanding. but at the same time he has needs. and it adds a lot of stress to our relationship. and i feel broken.

Wow...I'm so sorry you - or any woman - would have to go through that.  I could totally see how you'd be traumatized.  Did you file any complaint against them?  Sounds like a 'sugery' type biopsy they should have put you to sleep for...not something they should have just numbed you up and hacked away....and they should have done blood work to check your clotting etc before doing anything.  More than anything, to do all that, put you through all that, then leave you to pick yourself up, get dressed and go home?  Not giving care instructions or anything?  That'd be almost be like being violated in a non-sexual way...but still violated/brutalized. 

Have you tried talking to a counselor and seeing if working through the mental trauma would help with the physical problems?  It might be worth a try...and if there's any way of doing it...make the butcher pay for it. 

I went and looked up the vulvadynia - I'd never heard of it before - and when you say that you were terrified your husband was going to hurt you when applying the medicine...it does sound almost like a PTSD sort of thing.  I cut this from the Mayo Clinic web site (a reputable site, I'm thinking) - http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/vulvodynia/DS00159/DSECTION =treatments-and-drugs.  I'd suggest you keep looking for a dr to help you...if something like the biofeedback would help, it might be worth the effort to find a dr for it.  Your dr's prescription of the lidocaine is one of the treatments for the physical pain, but honestly, it sounds like you need help working through the mental pain.

Biofeedback therapy. This therapy can help reduce pain by teaching you how to control specific body responses. The goal of biofeedback is to help you enter a relaxed state in order to decrease pain sensation. To cope with vulvodynia, biofeedback can teach you to relax your pelvic muscles, which can contract in anticipation of pain and actually cause chronic pain.

Whatever happens, I hope that eventually you find a way past the pain and learn to actually enjoy the time with your husband...and that it pays off in a big way and you are holding your little one in your arms soon.

(HUGS)

 thank you so much. this happened in 2007. and i was too scared to do anything about it. but its far too late now.

you're absolutely right. its very much mental. like i clench up. i haven't heard of biofeedback therapy. i know i need some kind of therapy but since our insurance doesn't cover it i've put it off. $150 a pop for who knows how many sessions. i dunno. but it would be worth it really. i feel like we're missing out on intimacy and also i miss being a person who enjoys sex. i miss being normal.

thanks so much for this info. i am definitely going to look into it and show it to my husband. thank you!!

Talk to an attorney.  It may not be too late.  Sometimes they'll give you enough time in a free consult to give them the basics and they can tell you if it is too late or not...or if they think you've got a chance to win...even if you were only win enough to get therapy to help you heal up.  Some attorneys will also take cases wherein they only get paid if they win - and they take 1/3 of the settlement, so it wouldn't be anything out of your pocket, or a very minimal amount if it was.  I've no idea if there is a statute of limitations, so to speak...but the fact that 3-4 years later, you're STILL that traumatized...it's worth looking into.  Check around...ask your PCP if they can refer you to a good, more affordable, therapist.  You're worth it...and so is the relationship with your husband.

Heading off to bed now - it's midnight for me - but I really hope it all works out for you.

Have you tried pre- seed? Olive oil can cause yeast infection so if you get then I wouldn't chance it. I hope more people chime in here. Pre seed really does work though!!
Good Luck
Jessica