Individual Journies

I think that as mothers and mothers to be we bond over common experiences, and common view points. We find we have one thing in common, love for children, and we take that and run with it. I think at times we forget we all come from different backgrounds, different cultures, and different life experiences.

What happens when we forget to take that into consideration? We're offended or appalled by posts, or comments that aren't 100% in sync with our own viewpoint and on a message board....well you're going to end up pretty pissed off fairly often.

I mean, if I expected you all to have identical experiences I would be REALLY bitter and REALLY pissed off at every hea;thy baby coming home announcement, or pictures at home being shared right? Or when someone gets to full term and complains about wishing she went already...Man I would be one bitter *****

Instead why don't we all try embracing the differences, the different struggles, the different successes. I know I get a lot more out of this board when I seek different opinions. I get enough of my own 24/7 its refreshing to see what others go through and have to say.

/jumps off soapbox and hides.

OH wasn't working for me last night, but I completely agree!

I couldn't agree more!  Of course, that might be because many of my life, pregnancy and birthing decisions are out of the norm ;)  Live and let live - long as I don't have to suffer the DIRECT consequences of your decision, I couldn't give a flying **** if you circ, pierce ears, have an elective c-section, formula feed or whatever other hot button issue people think that their opinion is the only right one for.

I agree! If "your" decisions don't affect my life than it is really none of my business. Even if someone ask for my opinion, I give it nicely and always say good luck, never bash or put down. If no opinion is asked for and I don't agree with what they are saying/doing than I keep my mouth shut unless I see a child being hurt.

I totally agree with you!!  Often I dont' respond to people's posts because I don't want to get ambushed because I think differently than they do (and that has happened to me before).  The truth is, I think alot of people's complaints are petty and immature...  I have experience kinda like yours....you would love to get full term and prob don't understand why people don't appreciate the fact that they CAN go full term, instead they complain.  For me, I waited 8 yrs for a baby, and for me it drives me crazy that people get disappointed if they find out they are having a girl, and really wanted a boy or vice versa.  In my mind, I think, sure one of each would be great but I wanted children for so long that if God sends me 3 girls,  2 girls, or 2 boys and a girl or WHATEVER I have....I will be happy!  Because for me, I'm just thrilled I can be a mom.  In saying all this though, my opinion may differ from others, but I respect other's opinions whether I agree with them or not.

I agree!!  I come here to read about other women's experiences and if someone's opinions don't correspond with mine, that's fine.  The world would be a dull place if everyone was the same.  We are all entitled to our own way of thinking and as long as it doesn't affect me or infringe on my rights, then who cares!!  I think we all need to remember that.

When it comes to the "gender disappointment" post....I can understand that there are people who have struggled for many years to have children and that they may be offended when someone says they are disappointed in the sex of their baby but you (general) have to remember that we are all human and being disappointed is a natural human emotion.  I honestly was disappointed when I was told this baby was a boy, especially after being told and thinking for 10 weeks that it was a girl.  But it only lasted for a bit and now I am really excited since I have never had a boy.  Before I had surgery, I tried to have another child (daughter is 12) for about 8 years and nothing happened.  Turned out my ex-husband had an extrememly low sperm count and the doctors couldn't believe we even had our daughter.  They actually asked me if she was his.  Even though when I was trying for another baby and would have given anything to have one, I was still a bit disappointed this time.

I really enjoy this board and reading everyone's posts.  I am glad for the information and support that I have received from all of you ladies.

I get how someone may be offended also.  However, it feels like if someone who is pregnant "whines or complains" someone will jump down their throat and tell them to be thankful.  It feels like sometimes no one who is pregnant is allowed to feel anything negative.  And that's silly because pregnancy is hard!

I agree.

I totally agree that being disappointed is a natural human emotion. This board is (or should be) for everyone. So you will have your set of people who feel tired of being pregnant at the end, wishing they had a different gender, whining about not wanting to gain weight, ect. And you will have others who had to travel a different path to get here so might have other things they need to let out. Like the need for prayers and advice when something scary happens. All of it comes from being human and looking for a way to connect to people about emotions and experiences.

Just because there is 5 posts in a few days about a "silly" or not as important (to the reader's mind) topic doesn't mean that poster isn't worthy of our support as well. When someone whines about hitting 200lbs again.. I will whine and commiserate along with them. And when someone says they are scaried and their babies are in trouble.. I will hug and support them as well. Let's try to make this board open to everyone. If something really does bother you.. you dont have to reply..or do and give another way to look at things. But we have been good at supporting each other and I hope it doesn't change.