trying to not be judgmental...

I get to work this morning and hop on facebook...the 1st status I see is my sister in law's (lets call her S)...it reads:

"SOOOOOOOOOO I HAVE SOME BIG NEWS!!! HUBBY FRIGIN KNOCKED ME UP! LOOKS LIKE I HAVE GOING TO HAVE 3 DARN KIDS!!! SHOW ME WHERE THE CLIFF IS I WOULD LIKE TO JUMP! OHHH NURSING SCHOOLS IS GOING TO BE SO MUCH FUN!"

I am immediatly annoyed...yet I don't know why.  My DH and I are NOT trying to concieve as I am only 9 months post-op, but I still feel some sort of envy toward her.  Maybe its the fact that she felt the need to make this announcement via facebook before she decided to share the news with the family? Or maybe its the fact that she is treating this "opps" baby like some kind of curse?  And it doesnt help the replies she is getting from friends...here are few:

B: the directions to the cliff,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,have faith dear one you will fly
Her Reply: LMAO I was hoping to sink!!! 
T: LOL!!! Ummmm...how is it Ben's fault only?
Her Reply: I think I was sleeping so it's all his fault! LMAO
Her Reply: I am getting tied burned and whatever else they can do so it never happens again!!!  Guess I am taking after mom with 3 kids!!! This a definity a congrats I think moment!
K: are you serious???????? congrats... haha guess the pull and pray doesnt work like you have been saying... bwahahahahahahahaahah
A: Congrats. Dont jump. Just give it to me! Lmao
R: Thanks for the laugh. I just love how you said it. Sounds JUST like me :-) you should be even more insane and go for 5. HA! hubby just made his big appointment. Can't wait for the freedom! Blame it on the wine girl. That's how jessa got here. Love you. You can handle it. 3 isn't bad.


am I the only one who sees this situation a *****ildish? She's 32 years old, is a great mom to her 2 kids now, but why does she feel the need to act like this?

Maybe I've been bitten by the baby envy bug, so I will shut up and wish her well.  I just wish women didn't treat the gift of pregnancy/motherhood like a freakin curse!



ok that is the end of my rant, thanks for listening :)

I think that she is immature and childish!! I can't imagine what she could be thinking even if it is a joke. It's not funny. When women post crap like that I always think BC!! Here we are preaching to teens about not getting pregnant but in reality grown up need to be preached at too!! Every baby is a blessing! Rant on,,, I'm sorry you have to go through that.
J

thank you!

"even if it is a joke, its not funny"...my thoughts exactly!

I just want to tell her to grow up and stop being an attention ***** haha

That would annoy me too...it always seems so easy for ppl to get pregnant who don't want to be or shouldn't be, but the ppl *****ally want to be and have tried for a long time have a harder time becoming parents...ppl who act as if children are a burden shouldn't be having children in my opinion...children are ALL a blessing and a miracle...I don't blame you for feeling that way at all!! 

couldn't agree more...there are so many ladies on this board and everywhere, that are having trouble TTC, while others make "fun" of their opps babies right in their faces practically. 
very frustrating because I agree that having a child is a blessing.
she needs a reality check IMO

I look at what she is saying from so many angles. It's kind of disgusting really. What if her other two over-hear her and then treat this baby the way they heard mommy? Would she be happy if one day, some day this baby finds out, Oh my mommy wanted to jump off a cliff when she found out I was coming I am so loved!


Ugh, just horrible. If she didn't want more she would have explored permentant options before now instead of making a damn fool of herself.

very well said...the entire things scream "I WANT ATTENTION", thats how she's always been though, very little class so I am not surprised I guess.

Oh I would be SOOOOO pissed.  We weren't trying for another yet but it happened but even like a month or 2 out from surgery and I found out someone was pregnant I would get so jealous! he he I can't believe she announced it on facebook like that without telling family.  I am sorry!

ok ill be honest... when i found out i was pregnant with my son i wanted to jump... jump off mount everest.. and when his father told me he didnt want to be involved... i wanted to tie weights to my feet and jump so i would fall faster and harder.. this lasted about 3-4 months.. i thought adoption.. abortion... i didnt want to be pregnant... i was young.. 22.. i was loving my life as a single young person... finally i got it together and put my big girl panties on and delt with it and i couldnt be happier... again when i got pregnant with my daughter same feelings... i didnt know how i was going to handle 2 under 17 months... i was very very over whelmed... again i quickly put my big girl panties on and became excited and loved the fact that i was going to have 2 babies..... now im pregnant with my third... this one was planned.. im excited... but honestly i dont think reality has checked in that i will have 3 kids under 3... i cant wrap my head around this concept... i dont think its fair to be mad at her because she had an oops.. sure there are better ways she could have said it... but its not her fault that people are having trouble ttc.. or are having mc... you said it your self shes a great mom.. its prob a huge shock to her and her husband and she didnt know how else to express herself... alot of times when people are nervous they make jokes... this sounds like a reallly bad attempt at a joke... shes prob scared ****less.. have some empathy.

 thank for your reply Lexa,
I actually never thought about it from that perspective.  I imagine that she probably is scared and overwhelmed, having 3 kids requires an incredible amount of energy and patients.  So my empathy is there...however I still don't think ANYONE should make jokes about motherhood.  Those who do should maybe show some empathy for those who can't be parents.