dont know how i should feel,
Hey ladies,
My husband and I have been TTC for about 4 years off for about 2 years due to my RNY. I have a 4.5 year old son from a previous relationship. Our infertility is Male factor. Well i am on this website and babyandbump often and I have read stories of women TTC who find out that their sisters or bestfriends or co-workers get pregnant(many who arent trying) and they get kinda jealous or upset. Welllllllllll, my best friend of 11 years just called me today and was like "I have some bad news" and I automatically said "you're pregnant, aren't you?" She said yes and I said congrats(and actually meant it). She is pissed and upset and distraught because she already has 2 daughters and is on the IUD form of birth control. She is in the military and separated from her husband and is now pregnant by her boyfriend(yes, shake your head...trust me i did when i first heard of this situation)who has 3 kids by 3 different other mothers and their relationship is very shaky even though they have been together for a year. So w/o going deeper into her situations, she definately does not want another kid right now, and neither does he. She was talking abortion but she has had 2 in the past (many years ago).
I feel kinda crazy because I dont feel jealous or upset, i mean honestly...should i? i feel a little overwhelmed by that, is that normal or okay? I mean, I want her and I told her that I want her to do what is best for her, i dont support abortions but i will be there for her for anything. she said she was scared to tell me b/c she knows the journey my husband and I are going through. then she said jokinly that she would give us the baby but she doesnt know if she could deal with that.
Sorry its so long, I just wanted to tell the story to someone lol.... thanks for reading.
My husband and I have been TTC for about 4 years off for about 2 years due to my RNY. I have a 4.5 year old son from a previous relationship. Our infertility is Male factor. Well i am on this website and babyandbump often and I have read stories of women TTC who find out that their sisters or bestfriends or co-workers get pregnant(many who arent trying) and they get kinda jealous or upset. Welllllllllll, my best friend of 11 years just called me today and was like "I have some bad news" and I automatically said "you're pregnant, aren't you?" She said yes and I said congrats(and actually meant it). She is pissed and upset and distraught because she already has 2 daughters and is on the IUD form of birth control. She is in the military and separated from her husband and is now pregnant by her boyfriend(yes, shake your head...trust me i did when i first heard of this situation)who has 3 kids by 3 different other mothers and their relationship is very shaky even though they have been together for a year. So w/o going deeper into her situations, she definately does not want another kid right now, and neither does he. She was talking abortion but she has had 2 in the past (many years ago).
I feel kinda crazy because I dont feel jealous or upset, i mean honestly...should i? i feel a little overwhelmed by that, is that normal or okay? I mean, I want her and I told her that I want her to do what is best for her, i dont support abortions but i will be there for her for anything. she said she was scared to tell me b/c she knows the journey my husband and I are going through. then she said jokinly that she would give us the baby but she doesnt know if she could deal with that.
Sorry its so long, I just wanted to tell the story to someone lol.... thanks for reading.
Wow, thats some story! You shouldn't feel guilty regarding your feelings...your friend is in a messed up situation and needs to do what is best for her....regardless how other people feel about her decision! In NO way, would I let her convience you to take her baby.....that could only lead to heartbreak and a broken friendship! I hope and pray that you and your hubby can find a solution to your infertility issues and have that much wanted baby you both desire! Adotion is a wonderful route if you choose to go that direction one day....but as for now, your friend needs to make this decision on her own and you can only be there for moral support!
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