Scared to death

Well I am 18 months out from my bariatric surgery and 35 will 36 years old and just took a positive test on Sunday!  My daughter will 13 next month and was very sick with blood pressure issues and preeclampsia with her and delivered her early weighing 4 pounds. She was very healthy it was just me. When she was 6 months old  I got pregnant again and immediately went to a specialist who informed me that I would not live through the pregnancy and should terminate. After a long hard decision I did terminate which was the most devastating thing I have done in my life and has made me have horrible anxiety issues every since. And now here I am pregnant almost 13 years later? I went to my family doctor yesterday and he said  that he totally disagreed but could understand if i was only 6 months from the pregnancy and my blood pressure was still very high is probably why he suggested the termination. So needless to say the positive result through me for a loop! My doctor  and a long time doctor of mine have both said not to worry they said there is no reason to believe I won't have a healthy pregnancy! But I am still seeing a high risk doctor next week  to help ease my anxiety I hope. I have been off my blood pressure meds for over 6 months and off my anxiety meds since November. I just feel guilty and scared right now, I know the decision I made before is in the past  but it haunts me to this day and scared that this still could be life threatening for me but termination is not a possibility!

It's awful that you were put in that position 13 years ago. But, you can't change the past. Have you thought about seeing a therapist to deal with your anxiety over it?

I am sure you will do fine with this pregnancy. You are at a healthier weight so you your blood pressure issues shouldn't be so extreme. Going to see a high-risk ob may help ease your worries too. Take care of yourself, I'm sure you'll do great!

Melanie

I'm so sorry that you had to experience that 13years ago.  And you are at a much healthier place in your life now physically and it sounds like emotionally as well being off the anxiety meds for a few months now.  That's great.  I can understand that this is a scary time for you.  And just know that many many women in their late 30s and even 40s have healthy pregnancies after WLS - more healthy than when they were obese.  I wish you the very best for a happy and healthy pregnancy and please do keep us posted with what the high risk OB says.  I'm sure you'll be fine though.

Well, congrats for starters. You just have to take it one day at a time. If you already lost a lot of weight then your body is much healthier than it was 13 years ago. Prenatal care has also made so much progress since then....you can always look into going to a high risk doctor but they may say you don't even need one. Please don't let what happened 13 years ago dictate what you do now, times (and you) are very different.
P.S I have a 13 year old girl too. This will be my 2nd. I can already tell you at 13 weeks how far technology & research have comesince I was pregnant with her! The difference is amazing. Best of luck to you!