expecting 2nd child, trouble with first

Wondering if anyone can help me with some advice or personal experience, I have a daughter who is 5 and I am pg with our second child. Our daughter is a well adjusted happy girl, but lately she has been very difficult to deal with. She is having trouble with simple things such as, when asked why she is doing something she knows she shouldn't, ex. talking back to her dad, or sticking out her tounge at him when she is mad, she starts to cry and wants me to hold her and I am getting very frustrated with her, because she knows that I will not suck up to her. We have certain rules about how to behave and she has only started acting this way within the past 2 or 3 months. I am at the end of my rope, I have tried everything from talking to her about it, trying to calm her down, sending her to her room to settle down then talking about it but all she does is cry until she starts to have trouble breathing( asthma related). I am open at any advice or related experience, this is driving my husband and I crazy.

Sounds like she is being five, get yourself a copy of Love and Logic, it's a game changer and it's a great way to change things up so you an keep the behaviour from getting out of hand.

I would say it is a age thing.  My daughter started acting out around that age and there wasn't another child on the way.  She was 13 when her first baby brother was born.  Now my sister in law is going through it with her daughter and my brother in law is going through this with his 5 year old son.  The only difference is, my nephew actually hits and pulls on the younger kids.  Doesn't matter who the child belongs too either.  Time out for 5 minutes then talk about it in a calm voice works on my neice.  With my nephew, taking his favorite toys away for a few days works.  You may have to try other things until you find out what works with her.  You could talk to her doctor about it and see if he/she has some advice.  My kids doctor has plenty to share, even if you don't ask for it. lol  But I love them to death.  Sounds like she is just pushing buttons and seeing how far she can go with things right now.  Most kids will do things just to see if they are going to get in trouble.  If they do, it reassures them they are loved.  If the parent does nothing, the child feels unloved even though it may not be the truth.  Anyway, that is what my teacher says.  I think he has taught college phyc for many years now.  Good luck

Sounds like my daughter. She just turned 5 at the end of December and I have an almost 8 month old too. I think she's testing her limits, but I agree it is super frustrating and hard to deal with at times. I feel like she is smart enough to understand not to do certain things and then I realize she's just 5 and that I'm giving her too much freedom so I'll start being more strict. I think for myself, if I let one little thing slide, the next time she does something, it makes it so much worse, so I'm trying to stay consistent. It's hard, I completely understand.

Thank you for all the suggestions/comments. I feel better knowing I am not alone in the battle and that there are others who understand what I am going through. Thank you !!!

I am 6 months and have a 5 year old also. She has been acting the same way with me. I have been very tired and not feeling well and it is hard. She does go with her Dad on his days but on the weekends he has her she wants to come home early, I think it might have something to do with the pregnancy. I just try to lay with her a little more and read to her at night, it is hard. Good luck!

I am due next week and my 5yo son is acting the same way. I was really worried at first but now I realize its just typical behavior for that age and he loves testing his limits. I was warned about the terrible 2's but I sure wish someone would have warned me about the miserable 5's.
He really isnt that bad but I do agree its frustrating when he does things that (I know) he knows better than to do.

i have 3 kids my dd  13 is in the middle she has always been more difficult and more vocal than the boys everyone i have talked to says that its normal lol for girls to act this way ...well i have to agree and id like to tell ya things get better but they wont for a long time lol we as parents have to learn how to cope with our children and this is just another lesson in love lol we gotta learn not to sweat the small stuff and set boundaries etc also each boundry could be different for each child sheww parenting isnt easy i know what u are going thur keep posting we are here to listen lol... my boys are a cake walk compared to my dd  ..girls are just more difficult.