Thank you for your support

I wrote last week about my miscarriage.  I wanted to thank you all for your kind words of support and encouragement.  I ended up needing a D&C and blood transfusion at a hospital in Weston during my vacation.  I am sorry I didn't post sooner to thank you all, but I can't bring myself to read this board, right now.  I am barely hanging onto my sanity right now. 
I feel guilty that I am not ready to go back to work.  I'm a teacher, and I just cannot be around children, right now.  I also believe I am headed for an in patient mental health hospitalization.  Don't worry --I have contacted my docs and will be getting help.  Seriously, though --I was only about 8 weeks along ...how can I be THIS devastated?
Anyway, I really wanted to thank you all for your support.  Congratulations to you all, and maybe someday I'll be back with a happier ending.

I am so sorry for your loss, and I am glad you are getting help.  Take the time you need to grieve!

Just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your loss. I don't think any length of time puts a stamp on how much we will grieve or be sad...they may technically put it in books that a baby isn't considered a baby until a certain gestational age, but to us mothers growing the babies it's our baby regardless. Good luck in your recovery process and may God keep you and your family and bless you in this time of need. Wishing you all the best and hope you will be back with your BFP when the timing is right for you. Hugs!  ~Kerri

I am sorry to hear that you needed to have the D&C and the transfusion.  I ended up with a D&C for my m/c.  The procedure was pretty easy physically, but emotionally it was horrible.  I had mine done in an outpatient facility and I woke up to a baby crying- I guess I went nuts- they had to get my husband to calm me down- I don't remember much of that....But I just don't think people give woman credit...m/c are very difficult.  I was emotionally attached at the BFP.  I still grieve my baby- he / she would have been 3 a few days ago.  I still think of the baby and their milestones.  Having my children is a distraction to the pain- but it still brings me sadness when I slow down enough to think about it.  Give yourself time, and understanding (being annoyed by others pregnancies and children is normal-especially in the beginning). 

Oh sweetie I am so sorry you are going through this. You WILL feel better though. Be sure you are taking all youre vites & extra iron (and B-12 because a deficiency can cause bad mood swings). I know exactly how you feel. Unfortunately, miscarriage is a lot more common than we all think, but a lot of people consider the subject taboo and don't discuss it. Spoil yourself a little & get lots of rest. In a couple months you may be ready to try again.
(((hugs)))

Melinda,

I'm sorry that you had to have the d&c and transfusion.  I know how hard this can be. I had my MC a week before yours.  It's not easy. I get choked up when I walk through the grocery store and see the baby section.  It's not easy at all.  But it will get better.  Take as much time as you need to move through this.  Be gentle with yourself and please feel free to reach out to me via PM if you'd like to talk.

~ Maryn

Come back whenever you're ready...and know that we'll be here to welcome you. 

In the meantime, don't let anyone (including yourself!) tell you that you were 'only' 8 weeks pregnant.  The operative words are you were pregnant...and you've suffered a horrible loss.  Give yourself time and permission to grieve the death of your baby...and if that means getting help from a dr to get through it, then do what you have to do to take care of yourself.  Right now, you probably think I'm nuts to tell you this...but it does get easier (not easy...just easier) in a few weeks.  You will eventually have days when you'll be OK and feeling fine...days when you're angry and want to scream at the world...and days when you want to do nothing but curl up in a ball and cry.  No matter what your personal grief process is...just bear in mind that it is normal. 

I think the most important thing to watch for - and I'm not sure if it would be why you are considering inpatient care, but wanted to make sure I put this out there, just in case you (or anyone else out there) need to hear it - is that you do not harm yourself as a result of your grief.  This was NOT YOUR FAULT.  There is NOTHING you could have done differently to prevent it...and YOU DID NOT CAUSE this miscarriage.

Please take care of yourself, and if you feel the need to see a dr or seek inpatient care, do so.  Reach out wherever you need to for whatever help you need. 

I hope to see you back again soon - whether it's simply because you're ready to 'stick your toes back in the water' and come back, whether it's because you're ready to TTC again, or to celebrate because you have another BFP.

[[HUGS]]

Sorry for your loss. I had a early miscarriage between my children and it was very hard for me. You are smart to realize that you need help dealing with this. Take care of yourself. It does get easier with time. Years has passed for me and I still have days when I wonder about that baby. Was it a boy or a girl etc. Hope things start looking better for you.