How many Mother's allow their kids to be picky...
Hmmm.... I'm thinking this is more a behavoral issue rather than a food issue. I think he's probably exercising his right to be three!. lol
Have you tried breaking things up? It may be that he is overwhelmed with the quantity of the food rather than what it is.
You can try positive reinforcement. I would get a plate with a few bites of something you know he will eat and a few bites of some other thing he won't. Play a game where whenever he takes a bite of something, whether it be the food he doesn't prefer or the one he does, cheer him on. When he runs out of the stuff he likes he might be inclined to give the other stuff a try just to keep his cheering squad in attendance. I wouldn't coerce him at this point because you don't want something positive to turn into a battle of the wills. If he refuses to try the other food I would leave it alone for the time being. As we all know, you never want food to be an issue, especially since our kids are genetically predispositioned to become obese.
You can turn a "try-it" episode into a learning exercise. Go through the house looking for everything you can find that's brown, or green, or a circle, etc etc. If he loves yellow then make yellow the color of the day. This has to be set up before hand. Look for items around the house that are yellow- blocks, toys, crayons, etc. Pull aside activities that you can have some control over- especially for time purposes. Plan on each activity taking less than 3 minutes. Do an art activity with the crayons- have 5 crayons- pick out the yellow one and have him color a sun that is already on a piece of paper waiting for him, next "find" the legos (place about 10 or so on a table or a bucket) and pick all the yellow ones out and make a garage for his yellow cars, go to the kitchen and try a bite of a yellow cupcake., move on to the next set up activity. You could include different foods in the hunt..one time a cupcake, a few minutes later corn, etc etc.
If its truly a battle of the wills, which often times it is, then you can revert to "choices". I probably wouldn't do this with foods that I don't care if my youngster shouldn't eat anyways....ie- I'd probably do this with vegetables and healthy foods but probably not candy and such. Have him try whatever the food is in a nonconfrontational way. I wouldn't make a huge fuss over it because then he knows that you have a big vested interest in it and will probably rebel just because he's three. Put the food on a plate, probably at lunch time with his other foods. (again- keep it on the "down low") See if he will try it. If he doesn't then set the plate aside when he's finished. No fuss, no big deal- just put it aside. Make sure its in a place where he can see it, If later on he wants a snack then pull the plate to him and say "first you have to try a bite, then you can have____." This then makes the "choice" his and not yours. If he refuses then he is the one making the choice to not have the second item. It's no longer your fault- he's the one "in control". If he doesn't try something then its about control if he doesnt like something then that is completely something different. Based on the items your describing I don't think its texture related. I wouldn't try this approach with food he genuinely doesn't like or has texture issues to.
I hope all this makes some sort of sense! Good luck!
Have you tried breaking things up? It may be that he is overwhelmed with the quantity of the food rather than what it is.
You can try positive reinforcement. I would get a plate with a few bites of something you know he will eat and a few bites of some other thing he won't. Play a game where whenever he takes a bite of something, whether it be the food he doesn't prefer or the one he does, cheer him on. When he runs out of the stuff he likes he might be inclined to give the other stuff a try just to keep his cheering squad in attendance. I wouldn't coerce him at this point because you don't want something positive to turn into a battle of the wills. If he refuses to try the other food I would leave it alone for the time being. As we all know, you never want food to be an issue, especially since our kids are genetically predispositioned to become obese.
You can turn a "try-it" episode into a learning exercise. Go through the house looking for everything you can find that's brown, or green, or a circle, etc etc. If he loves yellow then make yellow the color of the day. This has to be set up before hand. Look for items around the house that are yellow- blocks, toys, crayons, etc. Pull aside activities that you can have some control over- especially for time purposes. Plan on each activity taking less than 3 minutes. Do an art activity with the crayons- have 5 crayons- pick out the yellow one and have him color a sun that is already on a piece of paper waiting for him, next "find" the legos (place about 10 or so on a table or a bucket) and pick all the yellow ones out and make a garage for his yellow cars, go to the kitchen and try a bite of a yellow cupcake., move on to the next set up activity. You could include different foods in the hunt..one time a cupcake, a few minutes later corn, etc etc.
If its truly a battle of the wills, which often times it is, then you can revert to "choices". I probably wouldn't do this with foods that I don't care if my youngster shouldn't eat anyways....ie- I'd probably do this with vegetables and healthy foods but probably not candy and such. Have him try whatever the food is in a nonconfrontational way. I wouldn't make a huge fuss over it because then he knows that you have a big vested interest in it and will probably rebel just because he's three. Put the food on a plate, probably at lunch time with his other foods. (again- keep it on the "down low") See if he will try it. If he doesn't then set the plate aside when he's finished. No fuss, no big deal- just put it aside. Make sure its in a place where he can see it, If later on he wants a snack then pull the plate to him and say "first you have to try a bite, then you can have____." This then makes the "choice" his and not yours. If he refuses then he is the one making the choice to not have the second item. It's no longer your fault- he's the one "in control". If he doesn't try something then its about control if he doesnt like something then that is completely something different. Based on the items your describing I don't think its texture related. I wouldn't try this approach with food he genuinely doesn't like or has texture issues to.
I hope all this makes some sort of sense! Good luck!
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My SIL has asked me numerous times how I get my kids to eat veggies and healthy, she has kids that 7 and 11 and they will only eat mac and cheese for dinner, she actually makes them their own meals because they will not eat "real food". I told her it had to start at a young age. I NEVER made the kids something different than what we eat for dinner. Now my daughter is 5 and my son 2 and they will eat broccoli, fish, chicken. Yesterday was my daughters birthday and I gave her the choice of her "birthday dinner" anything she wanted! She chose ham corn and mashed potatoes! When I was a kid I would yell pizza!
Not saying I have all the answers but I actually got a baby food grinder and as soon as she was old enough to eat, I gave her our food just ground up, and the same with my son.
Not saying I have all the answers but I actually got a baby food grinder and as soon as she was old enough to eat, I gave her our food just ground up, and the same with my son.
I totally agree with Tabitha on this. Matthew is the same way. There are just some things he doesn't like the texture of and that's that.
I was once one of those pregnant women that judged other moms by saying my child will never do this or that. I would never allow this or that. Well let me tell you.......we are all are WAYYYY better moms when they aren't here yet. You can say you won't do this or that but once they get here its a whole different ballgame. You do what you have to..to make your LO happy, healthy and for you to have sanity. You have to pick your battles. If I stood behind all the things I said I wouldn't do or allow when I was pregnant I'd be the mom of the century!
I would never cosleep was one of mine....no if's ands or buts about it. Well my little one is 21 months old and cosleeps with me. We tried everything possible to get him to sleep in a crib but he had severe reflux and the having to hold him upright for 45 minutes after a bottle was draining me. So by the time I got the bottle made, fed him, changed him and held him upright for 45 minutes within 20-30 minutes he'd be up ready for another bottle. So we slept sitting up in my bed for the first 6 or 7 months. Sure I guess I could do cry it out but I feel like that's cruel so I figure I've never heard of a teenager still sleeping with mom and dad. I'm sure he will get out of it on his own time.
I was once one of those pregnant women that judged other moms by saying my child will never do this or that. I would never allow this or that. Well let me tell you.......we are all are WAYYYY better moms when they aren't here yet. You can say you won't do this or that but once they get here its a whole different ballgame. You do what you have to..to make your LO happy, healthy and for you to have sanity. You have to pick your battles. If I stood behind all the things I said I wouldn't do or allow when I was pregnant I'd be the mom of the century!
I would never cosleep was one of mine....no if's ands or buts about it. Well my little one is 21 months old and cosleeps with me. We tried everything possible to get him to sleep in a crib but he had severe reflux and the having to hold him upright for 45 minutes after a bottle was draining me. So by the time I got the bottle made, fed him, changed him and held him upright for 45 minutes within 20-30 minutes he'd be up ready for another bottle. So we slept sitting up in my bed for the first 6 or 7 months. Sure I guess I could do cry it out but I feel like that's cruel so I figure I've never heard of a teenager still sleeping with mom and dad. I'm sure he will get out of it on his own time.
I totally get what you are saying Dee. I almost always fed my daughter whatever I was eating. Since my WLS 7 years ago, I have tried to add more veggies. I always tell her to try something a few times and that she probably will like it but if not then she doesn't have to eat it. I am glad to say she eats almost anything without complaint (well except eggplant, she doesn't like the texture, lol)
My cousin has a 6 year old and lets dictate what she will or will not eat. Like on big holidays when there are enough different dishes to feed the neighborhood, and she brings this stupid bag of frozen chicken nuggets and then eats 1 per hour. She is also the unhealthiest looking child I have ever seen....always has huge purple undereys circles & thin dry hair. I am pretty sure it has to do with her diet.
It is frustrating for sure to see this every gathering, especially since MY kid knows she has to eat like a regular person. I guess the best thing to do is try to introduce them to different foods at a young age, and make a vegetable a staple at every mealtime when possible.
My cousin has a 6 year old and lets dictate what she will or will not eat. Like on big holidays when there are enough different dishes to feed the neighborhood, and she brings this stupid bag of frozen chicken nuggets and then eats 1 per hour. She is also the unhealthiest looking child I have ever seen....always has huge purple undereys circles & thin dry hair. I am pretty sure it has to do with her diet.
It is frustrating for sure to see this every gathering, especially since MY kid knows she has to eat like a regular person. I guess the best thing to do is try to introduce them to different foods at a young age, and make a vegetable a staple at every mealtime when possible.
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I see where you are coming from in your situation. But until you have been in someone else's shoes who has a child with a "REAL" issue, then no one has the right to judge. I don't take him special foods to places or even at home. He gets what I fix everyone else. And I put a little of everything on his plate. But I can't force him to eat it. Again, all the meats are baked, as I can't handle grease. lol He will eat a salad and fresh fruit. Believe it or not, he won't eat even the unhealthy items like candy or chips. He is not a junk food junkie. He is a baked chicken lover though. If anyone thinks they can get this child to eat something other than what I or the doctor can, be my guest and try. He takes a vitamin and drinks carnation sugar free chocolate breakfast drink daily to get his vitamins and minerials. If it is mushy, forget. The closest thing to muchy he will do is wheat bread. But it can't have butter on it, just plain. He can't handle the feel of butter. He will eat like one maybe two pieces of bacon but no eggs. Yes, there are some parents out there who cave and give their child what ever they want just to get them to hush up. But this is not the case. He doesn't ask for a thing or cry for anything. His hair is fine, he looks healthy, and is very active. But he is underweight and I am scared for him on that fact.
There are MANY issues that would lead a child to not eat things, you as a parent can't control that just like you can't control the weather. You have these "ideals" in your head now but when that baby is in your arms everything is totally different. You WILL do what you have to to get your child to eat. You will not let your child "starve" because they didn't like what you cooked. Being picky doesn't lead to being obese, not having a good relationship with food, an addictive personality and 1000 other reasons lead to obesity.
I seem to remember you claiming that you couldn't eat healthy foods during your pregnancy, well there are studies saying that the better and more diversly you eat during pregnancy the more diverse foods your child will eat. My daughter is just over 6 months old and will eat any of the jar foods you offer her. She loves fruits, veggies and meats. I am sure over time there will be things she doesn't like but don't we all have things we don't like? You could put brussel sprouts on my plats 7 days a week and I won't eat them.
Oh and this is all coming from someone who has a best friend with a daughter with a SEVERE oral aversion and won't eat anything you give her and gags on everything including formula and water.
I find many of your posts offensive but wouldn't keep quite this time. I know from past experiences that you don't like people who disagree with you but, TOUGH!
When you have a child and see how things go you can judge and make comments.
I seem to remember you claiming that you couldn't eat healthy foods during your pregnancy, well there are studies saying that the better and more diversly you eat during pregnancy the more diverse foods your child will eat. My daughter is just over 6 months old and will eat any of the jar foods you offer her. She loves fruits, veggies and meats. I am sure over time there will be things she doesn't like but don't we all have things we don't like? You could put brussel sprouts on my plats 7 days a week and I won't eat them.
Oh and this is all coming from someone who has a best friend with a daughter with a SEVERE oral aversion and won't eat anything you give her and gags on everything including formula and water.
I find many of your posts offensive but wouldn't keep quite this time. I know from past experiences that you don't like people who disagree with you but, TOUGH!
When you have a child and see how things go you can judge and make comments.
Yes there are STUDIES. But nothing that is concrete to say that is what will happen ; ) And yes of course I was expecting ppl to be tough with this. That was the point to see how others felt about this. Seems like just on these boards You get more ppl who are JUDGE MENTAL ; ) than you do elsewhere. I also posted this on CafeMom and I have got more ppl who agree with me than not agree with me there. Ssoo Mmmm.. And it was same Exact post. I did not reword anything. I guess I worded this post wrong..cause I was not trying to Judge any parent by any means. Just was posting on what you think and yes I said some parents allow their children to be picky..but was not meaning to judge them cause all it is..IS A FACT ; )
Dee, I whole hardingly understand excatly where you're coming from, as I stated the same thing while I was pregnant with Tyler. Well he's 3 now and it is a little tough to get him to eat certain foods, as like any other HUMAN BEING he has his own individual taste buds now and he may not like meat loaf. When he was 1 & 2 I could praticually give him anything and he'll eat it...and he would finish his veggies before his meat all the time, well now he's been introduced to other foods..... he gravitates toward certain things. I'm okay with that as long it's healthy and he gets all his essential viatimins and nutrition. I love Spaghetti and could have it every night...he hates the TEXTURE. I won't make him eat something he doesn't want.
Has anyone seen the movie Precious?...her crazy momma was making her eat all kinds of foods in this movie and threatened her when she didn't eat it and she ended up overweight. My son has his staple foods and the only veggies he likes is Green Beans...that's okay with me...cause there's a lot of veggies I don't like. Just cause I have a taste for something doesn't make it right for him. Now don't get me wrong he can't dictate all the time what he eats....but he's an active member of the household and when I make meals I have to take in to account what everyone likes. My husband hates Meatloaf too, what I look like cooking something I know everyone hates.WRONG!
Pediatricians say you should NEVER force kids to eat and much of their current taste buds will change and it has many times for Tyler. He use to love Chicken Nuggets...now he hates them...He loves PB&J's for breakfast , lunch and Dinner.....he won't get it for Breakfast and Dinner, but I let him have a Cheese stick, PB&J and sliced apples for luncg daily...he'll grow out of that too as his tastes change and new things gets introduced. Good luck with that though sweetie, because if you can do it...I say go for it!
~~Gina
Has anyone seen the movie Precious?...her crazy momma was making her eat all kinds of foods in this movie and threatened her when she didn't eat it and she ended up overweight. My son has his staple foods and the only veggies he likes is Green Beans...that's okay with me...cause there's a lot of veggies I don't like. Just cause I have a taste for something doesn't make it right for him. Now don't get me wrong he can't dictate all the time what he eats....but he's an active member of the household and when I make meals I have to take in to account what everyone likes. My husband hates Meatloaf too, what I look like cooking something I know everyone hates.WRONG!
Pediatricians say you should NEVER force kids to eat and much of their current taste buds will change and it has many times for Tyler. He use to love Chicken Nuggets...now he hates them...He loves PB&J's for breakfast , lunch and Dinner.....he won't get it for Breakfast and Dinner, but I let him have a Cheese stick, PB&J and sliced apples for luncg daily...he'll grow out of that too as his tastes change and new things gets introduced. Good luck with that though sweetie, because if you can do it...I say go for it!
~~Gina
I think if "pickiness" reaches a level where it really restricts their diet, then it's time to talk to a doctor and make sure there isn't something going on. But no one person will love every food and no one will have the same tastes as their parents. I remember well the "salad battles" of my childhood. I was a kid who ate okra, broccoli, spinach and all manner of other greens, but I HATED salad. It was a constant source of disagreement through my childhood because my parents loved it and made a green salad with dinner just about every day. I had to eat it before I could leave the table. They didn't give up on this until I was in 8th grade or so. I went years without eating salad, finally tried again in college. You know what? I don't hate salad, I hate iceberg lettuce. I say as long as a kid is eating some good things or can find something on the table of an average meal that they will eat, it isn't worth the fight. Sure, they should try some, and things should be offered often, but don't make it into a battle. Sometimes they just don't have the skills to articulate what exactly they don't like about something, but the dislike is still valid. On the other hand, you don't have to totally cook around everyone preferences. I hate bell peppers, but my mom used them often, it was up to me to pick out the little bits I didn't want, she wasn't going to make a separate meal for me.
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