What Were the Last Few Weeks Like for You.....

I had some issues at the doctor last week and have been staying off of my feet, monitoring my BP and keeping fluid intake up.  But this has given me a lot of time to think and worry about every pain and ache, as well as the future of the baby.

I have been having so many issues with money, even though I moved to save on expenses.  We didn't get a lot of things we needed at the shower, so we had to spend a lot of our money (which we thought we would be able to put in savings, as well as money that was marked for bills).  The BF has to pay his fees at school, but that is better than having to pay full tuition.....thank goodness for graduate school tuition waivers.  We balanced the check book and there isn't much left for the rest of the month.  If things continue to come up every month, I'm not sure where the money will come to provide for our little one.  I am on disability as a result of complications from my RNY and my BF is on an F1 VISA from India to study here and can not take any work besides what the University gives him.  We live on a super fixed income, but because of what our income is, we make just above the guidelines for WIC and CHIP. 

Then I get worried that something will be wrong with the baby once she gets here.  I've seen several shows where the baby is fine inutero, but something happens in birth and they are born stillborn.  My mother is still under the impression that she is not going to see the baby ever.......and my sister is starting to act the same way and add fuel to the fire.

I'm sorry to complain, but I truly needed to get these things off of my chest....I don't have close friends so I really don't have anyone to talk to.  My BF and I talk, but all he can say is not to worry because things will be what they will be.  And that we will do the best by the baby we can, as long as she has food (hopefully I  an breastfeed), diapers and a roof that's all she needs.

Thanks for listening.....I really appreciate it!  You ladies are all wonderful!

Hey girl! Well, I'm not that far along but one of these days I hopefully will be. However, I wanted to tell you unless you're rich you're never financially prepared for a baby hun! My husband has 3 daughters, whom I've been more than happy to claim and raise as my own the past 3 years and for the rest of their lives, but trust me the financial burden is HUGE! We don't get child support from their mother. We relocated to this area in Jan of 2008 and my husband (as sad as it is- I have 2 degrees) was the only one able to obtain work. His pay isn't great, but we manage to rob Peter to pay Paul every month. I know that's no way to live and there are days I get stressed, but where there is a will there's a way. You will find a way to make it work and God will have his hand in it all too. We had to go on food stamps to help out with the grocery bill and would you believe that because I am actually enrolled full time in college- I'm not considred part of the household and they cut out monthly allowance by over 140 dollars :O!!!! Are you kidding me? I'm not eating for one anymore either but they don't count that til the baby is born. And they had the nerve to tell me that if I simply quit school I would go back to my original amount!!! Can we say backwards system?? That was a huge kink in our budget, but we're adjusting- as will you girlie! Try not to get yourself to thinking so much and just enjoy the last few weeks. Take this time to think forward and think about how wonderful life will be with your newest little blessing. Keep your chin up sweetie and hang in there! You're almost there and we're always here on the board to listen and offer advice :)

First of all you said you bf is not (won't) living with you? If this is true, than you do not to claim his income while applying for wic or other services. You should definitely be eligible for that. As far as they need to know, your bf is not even in the picture. Since the baby is not here yet, you are not recieving any sort of child support. So before you give birth, I wuld hightail it rigght over to the nearest WIC office. Hurry....

Another thing I will add, is look on Craigslist for some baby items that you still or will need. Baby gear is expensive and most of it is grown out of so quickly that parents are often left wondering why they spent so much on something. There are a lot of people on CL who have stuff in great condition, who just don't need it anymore so they sell it at a fraction of what they paid. In my case (lol) there are a few "upper class" neighborhoods nearby where they practically give their stuff away just to get rid of it. I just bought a gorgeous high end glider, ottoman set from one of these people, for $100.00 that they paid over $700 new. It was sitting unused in one of their living rooms, lol. Your baby will not care as long as the stuff is clean and works.

Thanks ladies!

I just think I am getting overwhelmed because I just have time to think.......not able to do much to take my mind off of things.

I appreciate the support!

Believe it or not but I was surprised to find that babies aren't as expensive as I was expecting especially if you get to breastfeed! I only buy Up & Up Target brand diapers and wipes. We got everything we needed that we didn't get at the showers on Craigslist and saved a ton of $! We don't have more than an extra $20/mo above bills, food, and gas but somehow we make it. We also don't qualify for WIC. You will adjust!

I was wondering what you did regarding your last post?? Did you go back in to the doctor??

Hi Ashlie,

I did go back....which resulted in the bedrest.  He would like to see me make as long as I can, but is no opposed to inducing this week if we have to.  The revisit resulted in my BP being lower.....147/98, although still high.  So he said for me to do nothing until I see him again.

But you know, in addition to my post, I have a million other things to do and am worrying that they won't get done.  My apartment needs cleaned, I need to purchase nursing bras and some PJs, get the bag ready, finalize my birth plan....get the bag ready for the baby.....So I can stay off my feet, but my mind goes a million miles a minute.

My mom is coming to stay for a week and she is being a pain continually asking if he is going to induce because she needs to get things ready at her house for my dad.  It's crazy......and adds more stress!

So, I will post after my appointment this week and keep everyone updated.  Thanks for the concern and help!

You ladies mean a lot! 

I am a total worrier and things do end up working out. I was talking to my Grandmother about it one day and she told me you are NEVER in the perfect place for a baby, you just make things work. If you do have to use formula use a store brand. We use Target and the giant can is $17. That is twice the size of the enfamil we were using and that can of enfamil was $25! Go online and sign up on every baby product website to get coupons.

I agree with the other posters, you are technically a single parent since you aren't married so apply for the WIC and CHIP based on your income solely.

As for the baby I am sure that she will be just fine! I was worried too, since we opted out of all of the genetic tests. She is perfect.

Good luck and keep us posted!!

Liz

What do they require at your WIC center in order to prove that you qualify? My cousin went in with her 2 babies and provided proof of vaccination, and that's all she needed. She and her husband are going through a "separation" but she didn't need to provide any proof of income at all. They gave her a huge amount of fresh fruits, veggies, bread, eggs, and formula.