visitors who smoke

I don't want to get flamed, but I expect visitors who smoke to refrain completely from doing so as long as they are handling the baby. I don't see why someone can't go a couple of hours without a smoke. I've been a smoker and it isn't that big a deal.

But what about those that are staying for longer than an hour or two? My mom, for example... she smokes. She's staying for a week after the baby comes. She knows that I expect her to wash her hands thoroughly and wear some kind of jacket or robe while she smokes (or change clothes every time she comes back inside from smoking... so long as the baby isn't being held against her smoke covered clothes).

What else can I do? Some will think that hand washing is enough but I can't help but feel like anyone who smokes needs to shower, wash their hair, brush their teeth, change clothes, and scrub their lips with a brillo pad before handling my baby after a smoke. I know this is unrealistic, but what's reasonable to ask?

It's your baby so you make the rules.

That said, as long as they are not smoking near your baby they are not technically hurting the baby.  Yes, they will smell.  :)

 My Gma smokes and I told her as long as there is smoking in the house Bella is not going down there. She got air purifiers, and she doesn't smoke in the house anymore. My uncle also had a baby a month after me and my gma watch's him. So quiting smoking in the house was the way to go. Here are a few reasons
   Babies and children who are exposed to cigarette smoke have a much        higher incidence of pneumonia, asthma, ear infections, bronchitis, sinus    infections, eye irritation, and croup. (Kellymom.com)
I think this is your baby and you can do what you want. I would have her wear a robe when she smoked. Leave the robe out of the house, come in and wash her hands. 
*HUGS*
Jessica

It's your baby.  I'd say as long as they're not smoking in the house or around the baby, that's sufficient...but that's me.  If your mom is smoking outside, the smoke probably won't be clinging too much to her...it'll float away on the breeze.  Whatever's on her lips/breath won't hurt anything to the best of my knowledge...and the baby will be to small to notice the smell.  : )

My husband finally quit smoking when we moved to Ukraine.  We lived on the fourth floor of a walk up apartment building - 101 stairs to our apartment...and I made him stand out on the balcony in -20 degrees if he wanted to smoke.  It took him about two months and he gave it up.  He used to make me crazy in NY before moving overseas...he knew I didn't like smoking in the house, so he didn't, but when his friends came over, he was shy to tell them they couldn't smoke...he'd open the window and have them sitting by the window.  That worked until one of his friends forgot to close the window and my cat ended up on the roof.  I  made sure to tell his friend after that...never again.

While I happen to agree with the last paragraph, right down to the brillo lol I do know that I am being slightly un-realistic. People who smoke will be allowed to hold the baby, but like everyone else (including hubby!) they will be washing their hands first. I am very sensitive to smoke so no one smokes in my house anyway and the few people that I know that do are very respectful. Most won't even smoke on my porch.

I guess if by chance the baby does smell like it after they leave nothing a quick wipe down with a wet wipe and a change of clothes won't cure. But the baby sure as heck won't  be breathing it!

Liz

Actually, smoke no clothes and even in furniture can up a babies risk for ear infections and other respiratory illnesses.  My 2nd child had a few horrible ear infections and I asked the pedi why this was happening.  He asked if anyone smoked around here and I said no one.  He then said even if it is in their clothes, it can up the chances.  Then I remembered one of the daycare ladies that took care of her smoked while on break.  Anyway, here is an article regard "third hand smoke" and it's potential risks.  If you google third hand smoke and infants, you will find many more.My personal opinion is... I hate smoking.  Sorry to all you smokers out there.. but it annoys the hell out of me.  I was a bartender for a while and I don't smoke.  I hated it when people would light up.  Most of the time, they would just sit there and let it burn... why waste your money.  I smoked 1 cigarette my entire life and would never ever do it again.  I hate the way it smells, the way it makes people smell, their homes smell.  Just a real pet peeve of mine.  I personally make everyone sanitize their hands before holding my baby at that age.  It's your baby... you decide.  Post a sign, make it known without saying anything.  If they don't understand... then how good of friends can they be???  As for your mom.. she should want what is best for her grandchild.  Maybe that is quitting all together. =)  Best for all! =)B

I totally get why you are worried about this. I also am one who HATES cigarette smoke. I won't be letting anyone who smokes hold my little one until they have AT LEAT washed their hands. Luckily the only person that I know that smokes is my MIL and she doesn't do it in her house so as long as she washes her hands I think I am OK.

Just make everyone who smokes, go outside and do it. The fresh air will help the clothes, and they can wash their hands when they come in.
I can't stand when someone smells like smoke either. I feel for ya!

Yeah, the brillo pad is a little extreme to ask someone to do. Doesn't mean I don't understand. I am gonna have to tell my fil to not smoke from the garage to upstairs, (We live in their basement.)cause I don't want the baby to smell it.

Kaytie you bring up an interesting topic and as an ex-smoker (I just quit the day I found out I was pregnant) I can totally relate to feeling like its not a big deal to go without a smoke, but what do you say??

My parents are both serious smokers. My sister and I grew up breathing that crap in and not only had serious sinus and ear infections our whole lives but also became smokers ourselves. Now my sister has two kids, 7 and 16 months. My parents, nor I when I was a smoker, NEVER smoked around the kids, but it was also still present on their clothes, in their car, in their house (even though they stopped that, after YEARS you can't get rid of the smell).

Now my parents wash their hands thoroughly before handling my sister's new baby and she is ok with that.

I don't know how to broach the subject, but I am NOT really just ok with that. Having read articles about 3rd hand smoke and now becoming a mom for the first time, I am really nervous about having my baby exposed to that AT ALL. I want his/her lungs to stay clean. I know my sister and her husband don't smoke around their kids, but it IS always on their clothes and those kids CONTSTANTLY have ear aches and sinus infections. I want to avoid that if possible but how th hell do I tell my family, if you smoke, you can't hold my baby?

It's just a ****ty situation and you feel like you can't win. LIke you, I feel as though I am being unreasonable and a hypocrite, especially since I use to smoke, wash my hands and then pick up my neice with smoke smell stuck all ove me.