Responsibility???

Ok, Let me give a disclaimer first: If this describes you-I apologize. I am not trying to offend, but it is a discussion and question that we seem to skirt around so often on the website and I just really truly want everyone's opinion WITHOUT this being a bashing ceremony. This site was designed to assist, uplift, and inform--not to BASH. With that said....think before you respond and DONT take it personally.

Question: do you think as post op WLS patients, we have the education gained from our surgical program and we know the consequences, so why is it so hard to follow any of the instructions they give us? We made this decision to have the surgery and be successful right? So why is it so hard to not get pregnant before the 12-18 months they ask us to wait? I mean are these all "one time accidents?" Or do we just not care enough about our bodies, health, and the health of our unborn child to at least give it the best pregnancy we can give it? Who else to provide a healthy body by sacrificing all than WLS patients? We took a huge step, a brave step in taking charge of our health and to change our lives for the better. So why can't we wait???

I appreciate your HONEST answers and feelings on this matter.

I think sooo many women have wanted a baby for years that when it finally seems possible, the wait seems like forever and some have age going against them. 

 That being said, I got pregnant with my son 7 months out of surgery and it scared me to death.  We were using precautions and he was a "one time accident" in which I ovulated 4 days before my period was due.  Now with this pregnancy I had been told I don't ovulate and would need drugs, so we had another "one time thing" and surprise again. Our friend teases my husband for being 2 for 2.  I just feel that God was ready for me to have another one. I am now 4 1/2 years out, and I think this time will be much easier b/c I can eat and drink more.

Jackie

Maybe it's an subconcious self sabotoge in some cases, in otheres they just cant wait to get pregnant now that they finally can. Some probably think its going to take a long time, so why not start trying now, some maybe dont believe it will really happen. Some are honest accidents, and some, i'm sure, are planned in complete disregard to doctors orders. There can not be just one answer to this, as everyone has a story, and everyone has their reasons. Some women cant eat anymore to fill that inner void, so a baby will take a certain place maybe? Who knows. I know that my doctor told me to wait 2 years, and I found out I was pregnany 13 months post op. Mine was not planned, nor is a mistake either. It's so easy to judge people, but regardless we still need to support each other. Thats what I feel this forum is truly about :)

I can only speak for myself. I got pregnant 7 months out while on the depo provera shot. No "one time accident" here or any act of irresponsibility. Although I know that it is not always the case, I now have a happy, healthy one month old son. 

You got an oppsie here. I am only 20 years old (19 when I found out) and still in college, no married, no set full-time job...so its safe to say I was not planning this. My case the condom broke.

Simone
Oh and in case any of that came off snippy it wasnt intended to. I wonder the same thing sometimes when I see people constantly posting and asking what would happen if and I know it means they are going to try. If only they could walk in my shoes and deal with the complications I have had due to not being able to eat enough.

I think a lot of women really believe they can't get pregnant.  Especially after struggling with infertility for years.  

  I did wait almost two years before TTC.   I also understand what it's like to have an oopsie baby.  I never dreamed I would get pregnant by having unprotected sex a day after my period stopped.  I NEVER ovulate before day 17 or 18.   Never say never, right?   I have a 4 week old that proves, yes, just once I ovulated on about day 8 or 9 of my cycle.

I love my oopsie baby.  He just came about 9 months earlier than we had planned.  We were going to start TTC again in Feb.

Amy

I think that there are many factors. Some truly are oopsies - condoms break, ovulate earlier (or later) then you think etc. I think that like some of the other ladies mentioned waiting that 12-18 months after years of TTC pre-op or being told you won't ever conceive is just too much for some people. I think many also were told pre-op (like myself) that we had PCOS and would never conceive, would never conceive without medical intervention etc that they relied on that solely. Most Dr's don't describe in enough detail to patients that birth control pills aren't properly absorbed in RNY patients, they don't tell us that ketosis can affect our fetus' brain and nervous system, or the effects that getting pregnant early out could have on our ultimate success.

That being said I did wait the 2 years my surgeon reccomended to start TTC, here I am 3 years out and 28 weeks pregnant with baby number 1 and all is going well,I I am however being considered high risk because of my WLS and other abdominal surgeries - I am totally OK with this because it means I get  monthly ultrasounds to check baby's growth. My OB while they have a basic understanding of WLS is not totally up to speed, I have to be my own advocate.

Hope that helps somewhat!

In my case I got pregnant 7 months out of surgery. It was a total oops baby, and although I am very excited I also worry a lot and wi**** would have been a little further down the road.

I was taking birth control and we were also using protection- with the malabsorption problems. I am currently unemployed and my BF is looking for a different job. This was not the ideal time, but I must believe that things happen for a reason.

I can't speak for anyone else- but in their defense fertility rates sky rocket as women lose weight, so it does become much easier to have little mistakes. And in my case I'm at the right age to concieve, I believe these are the two factors that worked against us.

So with that said I think that some are accidents, some women have tried so long to get pregnant and this provides that oppurtunity, and some people just blatantly ignore the potential risks. But if anyone *****ads this is thinking about tryong early- please wait, it's best for you and the baby. I am struggling with getting all the food in I need. It's not easy and the worry really sucks!

Well I appreciate your candor. I can give you some open and honest  information on my situation. Please take a minute to read through.

I have been married twice no protection at all during previous and current marriage. I NEVER had a scare, not even once. I had been tested and found to have PCOS when I was 19. I was very healthy and not very overweight in the earlier years of marriage. I have had homrone testing and was literally told I had a better chance of winning the lottery even with hormone assistance. I actually did not have a period for 21/2 years (technically menopause according to one GYN). We had reserved ourselves to not being able to have a baby for the most part.

Next

ONce I was recovered enough in 10/09 I saw a GYN and got the consult for a hormone IUD. (It has less side effects than oral/ injection birth control and is absorbed locally instead of systemically) As instructed I came back to the office within 5 days of the start of my next period. They test for infection prior to insertion and I found out I had a pretty bad one. I was on oral and vaginal antibiotics. I had to wait until my next period now. A few days before my next period I ended up having a raging painful yeast infection and was told I could not come in this time either. SO the last plan was to wait for my next period.

Then

My next period never came which was not weird to me considering my extremely irregular cycle.

Protection

We used alternative methods alot for intimacy as well as frank abstinance for long periods of time.

We were going with the IUD because of my very high risk for clotting (birth control can increase that)

We did NOT use condoms, hind sight we needed to be more vigilant



Frank Honesty

Despite all of the information above I seriously did not believe I could get pregnant without assistance because even when I was healthy I could not get pregnant

THis is not the time to be pregnant, I know that, we know that, my Doctors know that.

That being said, Abortion is not an option for us. I have made all the immeadiate changes I need I have seen/ made appoinments for who I need to see. I will do all I can to carry this baby and if its not meant to be, as soon as I am allowed to I will get an IUD as planned.

This was a complete surprise, I did not plan it, I am petrified,

SO there you have my non judgemental open honest opinion.

Thanks for reading.

Oh gosh, I would SO be the naughty one in this situation! And I'll be straight up honest with you, I got pregnant 3 months out from RNY and I meant to do it!

Yes, I know it wasn't the best choice, and no, my surgeon did not approve it, but I did tell all my Dr.'s my decision and my plans to get pregnant despite this. Although they couldn't medically advise me to do so, I got the impression that it would not be the end of the world given my own medical background, so hubby and I talked about it and decided to give it a go. I was blessed to get my BFP almost 2 weeks later, instantly!

Now, I had some extenuating cir****tances that pushed me into making the decision that I did, and I also had some pretty serious complications throughout my entire pregnancy too that I wasn't expecting. It was most certainly a risk that I took and not the best of timing for sure. But I'm so happy and so fortunate and lucky to have my almost 19 month old handsome, happy, and healthy little boy to show for it! He most certainly is a miracle baby given all of the cir****tances and the situations he was put through during my pregnancy, and I'm so lucky that it worked out the way that it did!

All of that being said, I'd do it all over again if I had the choice! Keeping in mind, that I had my own personal cir****tances to consider and we just felt it was the right decision for us, I certainly wouldn't advise others to make that same choice! If it's something that you are going to choose to do, you really, REALLY need to think it over and weigh out your options!

Hope that helps! LoL

Darcy