Your opinion....Co-sleeping

Okay, I am pretty much made up my mind on this, but wanted to see what everyone else is doing.

I have alway been an against your baby sleeping in the bed with you...guess it comes from experience (I as a child didn't) and all my nephews were in their own beds from day one.  I will mention my husband doesn't neccessarily agree with my choice the baby sleeps in her bed from day one; however, supports me on it.  (I will mention, when we met, his four year old daughter still slept with him)...I am with the position that the baby is in her own room, in her own bed (crib).  I just got an article from one of those weekly pregnancy newsletters I get and it had some interesting thoughts around it.  Didn't really change my mind...so I thought I would throw this out to the team of ladies on here...what's your plan?  Those who have previous children, what did you do before, pros/cons of your choice?

Your thoughts?

Thanks, Stacey

Let me say up front that I don't have anything again co-sleeping at all if that is what the family chooses.

I, however, having had 4 kids already, have learned that (my kids at least) developed much better sleeping skills being in their own bed from day one.  I do keep a bassinet right next to the bed the first few weeks to make my life easier with nighttime feedings and to keep an eye on any early issues, but after that it was a crib in their own room (with monitor of course).  

Two of my kids have special needs and I believe that developing good sleeping habits early on has really helped them overall.  

Like I said...I think either way can work, but for me it just worked better this way.

Edited to add: I also do not jump up and get them at every little sound (well early on yes..but not later).  It has really helped them learn to self-sooth and now they know that if they do cry, that I do come running because I know it's serious.  I did some reading early on that said if babies don't learn to self sooth they will have a much more difficult time sleeping as time goes on and I've never had a trouble with nighttime.  I have 5 year old triplets and a 4 year old and they go to bed happy and usually sleep straight though the night, and if they don't they quietly read or play with a toy until they fall asleep.  And if there is something wrong (like they aren't feeling well) they know to ask and they can come out for comfort or whatever they need.

-Jennifer

When pregnant I used to think I would NEVER co-sleep.   I was adamant before Matthew was born that we would not be co-sleeping at any cost.  Well Matthew had severe reflux and in order for me to get ANY sleep I ended up with him sleeping on me.  Because with a severe refluxer you have to leave them sitting up for 30 minutes after a feed....at least with Matthew.  If you laid him down too soon he would projectile vomit everywhere!  So by the time I got up made a bottle, fed him the bottle, changed him and kept him upright for 30 minutes...guess what it was almost time for another bottle.  So, I ended up sleeping with him on my chest in my bed for the first 3-4 months.  Now at 11 months he is still in the bed with me and my dh....could I move him to his bed....sure.  But, I'm sure there would be plenty of tears and sleepless nights for me and him.  So I guess what I'm saying is don't rule it out....because had we not coslept I don't know if I would have survived with any sanity or hair left.

And for what it's worth we had a crib in our room and in his room, bassinet, one of those 200.00 amby motion beds made for refluxers (didn't work) and a pnp that we tried before we started cosleeping.

great question - I look forward to reading the responses! My plan is to put the crib in our bedroom - there is PLENTY of room, for at least the first few months. Our baby's room is going to be on the 2nd floor and we are on the first so that's what I am most comfortable with. The baby will be in the crib but less then 10 feet from me.

I am also panning on using the pack and play sleep in the room for the first few months because we are on the first floor and the nursery is on the second floor.

My sister is 15 and still crawls in the bed with my mother  My mother thinks I am the big bad first time mommy wolf because I am against children in the bed with you. I will have my LO's bassinet and a co-sleeper near my bed but no to the sleeping in the actual bed with me and DH. I dont know if this constitutes as co-sleeping in your book (as far as my babies bassinet or co-sleeper in our bedroom) but not in the bed.

Im not against co-sleeping, I have done both. When they were newborns they literally slept on me for the first week or so, then I moved them to a bassinette next to me. But once they were around three months or so, every time they would move I would instantly be awake, so I knew at that point it wass time to transition to the nursery. When I got divoriced my boys where 2 and 4, and I let them sleep with my in our new apartment. This helped them (and me too lol) with night time anxiety, and helped us bond in a way I truly believe. Eventually I transitioned them back to their own beds, but to this day occasionally they will climb in bed with me when my new husband is working nights, or they are sick etc. If they get restless and it starts interfering with my sleep I give them a warning, and if it keeps up they have to go back to their bed.  It works out for all of us. :)

My three sons all co-slept with us for the first 5-9 months of life and we had no trouble transitioning to their own room after that.  When they were really little we assembled the crib with the 4th wall not installed (I can't imagine all beds allow this but ours did) then our mattress was right side by side with no gaps in between (our bed is on a platform and taller than the average bed, so in our case this made a great advantage).  From there I could reach out to him, feed, snuggle, soothe, et****il he started rolling over.  Once that happened we put the 4th wall back up and I could still reach over and touch him as needed but as someone else mentioned I didn't jump at every sound.  My 3rd son started sleeping through the night way earlier than my first (5 months vs 9 months) so as soon as he started sitting up and sleeping through the night we moved him to his own room.  At that point he was used to the crib and didn't mind the change in scenery.  Maybe we were lucky.  Both my 1st & 3rd kids were amazing night-time sleepers.  My middle child seems to wake up ALOT, but when he comes to us and wants to sleep with us we have a 1 minute rule, he can cuddle with us for 1 minute then he has to try to sleep in his bed again.  It's very rare he comes back after that.

As I look back I'm glad I had those cuddle nights with my boys.  Those memories are precious and I am glad I did it. 

I started off thinking I was definitely gonna co-sleep.  Then, I was researching some books on Amazon and found a review where a person said that the author's support of co-sleeping never mentioned the RISKS associated with it.  She said her daughter died in their bed from asphyxiation.

Now, just the fact that it is a possibility--no matter how remote--that your kid can die while co-sleeping...well that's enough to dissuade me and my husband.

I'm thinking we're going to keep a bassinet in our room for the first 6 months and then trasition the little one to his/her bedroom.

I like the idea of keeping your baby close at night, but I am just terrified of SIDS and asphyxiation and I will NOT risk it.

but did you know that the rate of SIDS is higher for children who DO NOT co-sleep? And that most babies who die while co-sleeping do so because their parents where not co-sleeping properly. Their are risks either way.