Month # 2... BFN! Not to be discouraged...right?

Mary Benford
on 12/29/09 4:07 am, edited 12/29/09 4:08 am - Emmaus, PA
So, I'm not complaining...   but wooh!   This is stressful!   It seems like all of my cousins, and friends are pregnant and "didn't even really mean to be!" and here's my husband and I...   trying...  and charting..  and taking temps...   and month #2 and not pregnant!!  It's so hard to not get discouraged when aunt flow comes on that 33rd cycle day!  Especially when I swear (it's more than likely in my head) That I'm having pregnancy symptoms!  More than likely it's because I want it to happen so badly...

I know some people have been trying for years..   and years..  and when it's meant to happen, it will happen...   but how did you all keep yourselves from getting upset?

It certainly didn't help this past Sunday at a family party when every member in my family was coming up to me saying "is there going to be an announcement???"  "Are we pregnant yet??"

Ugh!

Help me here ladies!   I need your advice!

     Success is a journey... not a destination!     

thetexgal
on 12/29/09 4:12 am - Fort Worth, TX

Try not to stress as that doesn't help the situation. You are just two months into this. I just got pregnant for the third time in a little over 1 1/2 years of trying. First, loss at 8 1/2 weeks, second ectopic, and now hoping for it to stick around.

I am not sure of your age. But, just make sure you following all the proper steps and see what happens. But, don't put too much stress on it as it puts a toll on your body. This time hubby and I weren't even trying and it happened. It was after a HSG to check my tubes from the ectopic. I had fertility treatments to get pregnant the other two times.

Hang in there!!!!

Traci

Mary Benford
on 12/29/09 4:41 am - Emmaus, PA
Thanks Traci!

     I know it sounds so selfish...  and I don't mean it to , because I know a TON of people in your situation who have been trying for what seems like forever...

    Like many gastric bypass patients, I was told my entire life that I wouldn't be able to have children because of my weight/irregular periods/PCOS/ genetics (my mom had a horrible time concieving)...  which has all stabolized since surgery.. I'm 26 now, and have been married for 6 months....   It has always been a fear of mine that I wouldn't be able to concieve. I'm just a little under 3 years out.. and maintaining.  I am taking prenatal vitamins..   along with folic acid, and calcium...  I'm eating healthy..   reading lots and lots of info on these boards (mostly lurking..  but you are a smart bunch of ladies!)  Liz. R just passed along her book "taking charge of your fertility" which I am slowly paging through and reading thoroughly...

 I'm a planner LOL   and I know certain things are completely out of our hands..   this being one of them.  I'm just trying not to get discouraged...  and also... not to think about it so much to the point of stressing myself (and my hubby) out.

Thank you for your kind words!  It's much appreciated!

     Success is a journey... not a destination!     

Sarah D.
on 12/29/09 4:59 am - Liverpool, NY
It took me and my DH 13months to get PG.

~*Sarah*~ Proud mommy to Anthony (4) and Twin girls born on 10/5/09 @ 34weeks.....Paytra Josephine(5.1oz) and Piper Elizabeth(3.6ozs).


 

Ann D.
on 12/29/09 5:41 am - Amelia, OH
You aren't going to like my answer....

It takes the average couple 8 months to conceive.  Now, granted, situations like mine throw it off...but really...as long as you guys are having enough sex...don't start sweating it until at least the 6 month mark (and then, just start asking the basic questions).  Don't even try supplements or home remedies or old wives' tales until then either.  Let the biology happen.  Hopefully, you will never see the 6th month mark.
*********************************************************************
Ann

Mom to Ean after 5 longs years of Infertility....2/29/12!


icon_angel.gif - 3/07                             icon_angel.gif - 12/07                             icon_angel.gif - 3/08 
icon_angel.gif - 5/09                             icon_angel.gif - 11/10                             icon_angel.gif - 2/11
Mary Benford
on 12/29/09 9:49 pm - Emmaus, PA
I appreciate your honesty :) Thanks for the advice!

     Success is a journey... not a destination!     

XiomisMom
on 12/29/09 5:51 am
Just a thought- my cycle is longer too. My midwife suggested taking clomid because of the longer cycle- not that it is out of the normal range, but can make timing harder. Some doctors won't prescribe until 6 months of trying have passed- My midwife new my history this time around and went right ahead with the prescription. It worked- I actually got my LH surge sooner than without the clomid and we were able to time everything more precisely. Just a thought since your cycles seem to be longer too-

Carrie
Liz R.
on 12/29/09 7:51 am - Easton, PA
I hear ya!!! I was in tears 2 months into trying because I was conviced it would happen right away, well once I told myself that I was doing what I could and it would happen when it was meant to - yep... month 3 - pregnant!! after the miscarraige right back there, it couldn't happen quickly enough, well 2nd month there it was - BFP!!!

Now looking back I see my first cycle or 2 as "practice" after that I really got the hang of what my body was telling me.

Of course it would help you if I got those OPKs in the mail like a good friend... I'll go put them in the envelope RIGHT NOW!

*hugs* hang in there sweetie! that 2 week wait is pure torture! I know we'll be seeing good news from you and that great hubby of yours shortly!

Liz
Mary Benford
on 12/29/09 9:51 pm - Emmaus, PA
You ARE such a good friend Liz... and it's great to know I'm not alone in this.... <3

     Success is a journey... not a destination!     

Soule
on 12/29/09 4:38 pm - Charlotte, NC
I see you said you had pcos issues before surgery.... Has your doc tried to put you on a low dose of metformin to help you conceive? Have you had an ultrasounds around ovulation time to see the quality of your eggs at all??? There are dozens of things that can help you... I too suffered from pcos before surgery and was told since I was 12 y.o that I would probably not get pregnant. And from my body being in that PCOS state for so many years, I needed to work with a RE who told me my body needed a little boost to start working the right way again after losing so much weight... And I was preggo in 1.5 cycles.... So don't be discouraged
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