I have been refered to a RE

I wasnt going to even come back to post because I know I was going to get a bunch of I told you so, but I thought I might be able to find someone that might understand why I HATE that it has come to this....

I wish I could see it as good news, maybe I am just negative because the RE is going to be expensive, and i really feel like it probably wont work (maybe I am just having a REALLY negative day)

I do need help staying that way, but i will be in TTC jail till mid March, so I cant even see if the Folic Acid is the only problem... Which the last doctor found out about.

It sounds like you had a good experience with the RE, thats great, maybe that will happen with me, I am not so positive....  I just feel like it wont happen in my gut.  I think your experience sounds wonderful, it also sounds like a lot of doctors appointments, but you got a great outcome, thats wonderful for you..  only time will tell if mine works out if i go.

Thanks for sharing your story with the RE

Yes it was a lot of visits and all of them were covered by insurance because they were not fertility treatments.  An RE does not have to be expensive to the patient.  Most insurance covers diagnosis and treatment of fertility issues.  I have the worst insurance in the world (Aetna) and even they covered it.

You've gotten some good support on this post.  Frankly, the only person being negative is you.  I think you're right that you're having a REALLY negative day.  This is good news, not bad.

Thanks for trying to help I just feel like no one can seem to understand, everyone thinks i should be over the moon about this.... When she told me yesterday i started bawling like a baby..

I cant find another way to explain myself, but I am not optimistic about this, I just cant be, if nothing else I wont LET myself be.

Oh and I never minded that it was a lot of doctor's appointments because I got to see my baby every time I went.  In fact, I was sad went it went down to every two weeks and now I hate waiting four weeks between OB visits.

Just curious were you working when you had all the apointments?

Yes.  I work full time.  My office is close to the doctor and I made my appointments at the first available time in the morning and went to work afterwards.  I just explained to my bosses that I had a medical issue going on and I needed some flexibility with my schedule.  They were very understanding.

Hi Amanda,

You know, Its hard for people to understand exactly how you feel because they aren't you. However, this is the best place to meet people who have more in common with yourself than others in connection with TTC. I want you to know that you have a right to feel however you want to, but do listen to the advice others have given. I too had multiple MC and had not been to a RE before I had to go to an RE and really it was a combination of both my husband and myself that we weren't conceiving. They tried a lot of other things but finally IUI which didn't work 3x's and IVF which did.

Trust me, my heart was always heavy with why can't I be like normal woman and do the deed and get a baby. Well, some of us have to show how much we want and will be able to love a child before we get that blessing. Will you love your child any less if you have to have a little help bringing him/her here? I doubt you will. I don't think any of us IVF'rs out here preferred this method, but I choose it over adoption until I have no other option and then I'll have to warm myself up to that idea too. If its in your heart to be a mother, you will be. Will your method have to be creative, that's a possibility. Hang in there and try to be positive despite your fears.

I don’t know why you would think that someone would understand where you are coming from. Many of us are thrilled to be able to finally find out why we can’t stay pregnant or why we can’t get pregnant at all…   An RE is a great place. They fill you with hope and tell you your options… maybe you need to see someone for the negativity… because that isn’t going to help you at all. It will make things even worse.   What if the problem isn’t you and its your hubby in the quality of his sperm… as far as the Folic Acid goes… have you done any research to see what the effects are?   And I wouldn’t call it “Jail" my husband and I spent 3 years of our lives trying for the miracle we currently have, we had a lose. Its not the easiest thing in the world. However, without the RE we would have not known what my problems were… it gave me hope.   And if you think we all came here to say “tell you so" so be it. We tried to offer support and you didn’t want to hear it then. Now we are excited for you and you want nothing to do with our support.

ps... it was alot of appts... however I scheduled it when I could use my vacation days and also my insurance covered the appts and medications up to IVF. They would not cover the IVF. Thank god we didnt have to go that far...but we had a plan to save if we did! 

no one has still told me why i cant stay pregnant.  I would give anything to know why even if I could never have a baby just to know what is causing this would be a nice end to the journey.

I am not sure if he will be able to tell me or not, I have been told over and over again, that some times they just dont know why you keep having miscarriages, so i have accepted that, and I am worried this will give me false hope.

Id like some hope becuase seriously I have had  very little up until this point...  I am trying to be hopeful for the husband, this is the only place I have ever felt like I could say exactly how i feel... Now I am wondering if that was a good thing....

I am thinkful for what you had to say, and for sharing your experience, but like I said I dont want to get my hopes up I did that with the second one and I did that agian with the third one... I feel completely burnt when it comes to hopes and a baby...

I like you have no problem getting pregnant.  I have only had one miscarriage but that is because I had a doctor who was proactive and was like we are going to find out NOW why you lost this baby.  I was elated that he went to those lengths for me.  We found that it will always be the problem of staying pregnant because I have a blood clot disorder.  Am I happy that I have a clotting disorder?  No.  Am I glad that I found out?  Yes.  Now we have a game plan to keep me pregnant.  I told my husband during the rough time after losing the baby that I just wanted a baby.  I would do what it takes.  I would take what God gives me and consider myself blessed.  I have to give myself daily injections.  I hate needles, but I do it because I am pregnant and I want to be pregnant and I want to see my baby in August.  Like the others have said, don't consider this a bad thing.  You will finally get your answers.  Maybe it isn't what you want to hear, but it will be finality and clarity regarding why you have had so many miscarriages.  This could be your blessing to get your baby. 
I just recently found out that I am pregnant.  My doctor so far wants to see me every two weeks.  He is 45 minutes away.  Yes that is a pain.  Yet I don't care because it will bring me piece of mind to know that my baby is okay.  Not to offend you or anyone else, but most people will do anything for their children when they get here becaise they want their kids happy.  Why aren't people willing to do anything to get their children here?