Made it to 38w1d. Long, and vent.

So...for those of you asking...here is an update. I made it to 38w1d. My c-section is planned for next Tuesday, the 10th at 9am, 39w1d. As much as I wanted the vbac, I know this is best for medical reasons and I have come to terms with it. I have great, great anxiety about another c-section because of all the complications with Emma. It was such a rough, rough road last time.

I have been pretty sick too. About 6-7 weeks ago they told me I had bronchitis and an ear infection and gave me antibiotics for the ear infection. But here it is 7 weeks later and I am still coughing up a lung. I had one doctor tell me it was sinus drainage and to take sudafed. Another one gave me an inhaler for my bronchials. Another told me to take plain mucinex for the phlem. I talked to my perientologist and we kind of agree that at this point I am having anxiety attacks. (For a couple of reasons...about the c-section and about an issue with my inlaws) I had them once 15 years ago and the symptoms are the same. I cough hard and my air way feels the size of a pea...then I can't breath and end up dry heaving, then I vomit spit, but no phlem. I am super frustrated with it. This morning the episode lasted over 30 minutes, luckily hubby was here to tend to Emma. I was so frustrated that I was crying at the same time. Hubby thinks I need antibiotics. I think I need anxiety meds. 3 docs won't give me antibiotics for a virus, if that is what it is. My perientologist doesn't want me to take anxiety meds before baby is born. Oh, and last week they tested me for preeclampsia, luckily those tests were okay.

Then...not to complain too much because I treasure this pg...but I am to the point where I am just plain miserable. 38w, but baby is measuring at least a month ahead...probably 9-10 pounds my guess. I am just plain miserable. I literally sit on a stool to wash dishes, my back hurts so bad. I don't sleep between peeing and coughing all night. I try to keep telling myself to suck it up. The baby is doing good at his nst's and I have an end date of 1 more week...I can do this. Trying to cherish every movement and feeling because I know I am getting my tubes tied.

Then the hospital changed its policy about visitors because of the h1n1 virus. I understand, really I do...but it changes what I envisioned for our family bonding. Anyone under 14 isn't allowed in the hospital. So, that means no Emma meeting Micah until we go home. And most likely I will be there 3 nights, so that means I don't get to see my Emma for 3 days. Not to mention that because of the situation with the inlaws Emma's care is kind of up in the air. I want Victor at the hospital with me all the time, but he will be caring for Emma a lot. Good for her, she needs some stability, but since she can't visit us at the hospital that will mean less time for hubby to be there with us and bonding. My mom will help some, but not super reliable as far as timing. And I wanted our first time together as a family just the 4 of us, but someone will be watching Emma when we get home, so...that is probably out of the question. Maybe selfish of me, but I wanted just us to bond a bit before other visitors.

So, my peri is pretty awesome. She saw how anxious I was about everything and made my c-section with the best surgeon...a guy that can handle my extra pani skin and fat (which is filled with edema so bad right now) and she requested a second surgeon to be there for extra help. That made me feel better. I have a pre op appointment on Friday to talk to the surgeon about everything that happened last time so that we can have all the precautions taken to avoid infection this time. I told them to just give me the tummy tuck at the same time...lol but they wouldn't go for it. I am trying to think positive, that by it being planned and not an emergency after 26 hours of labor, my body will be less stressed and things will go much better.

So, lets take a poll. I went into labor with Emma at 38w2d when my water broke...she was 9 1/2 pounds. Who thinks I will make it to my c-section date at 39w1d? Part of me really wants to make it to stick to the specialists and birth plan without going into labor. Part of me thinks there is no way my body is gonna make it with baby being so big and my body so stressed. Every time I get up from doing anything I expect my water to break...lol

Anyway, I know this was long. I am really excited to meet my little Micah. I don't mean to be complaining...knowing there are so many trying to get pg. Thanks for reading if you got through this. Shari

aww sweetie! I hope that you do make it one more week just so the baby is in the best shape that he can be before making his big entrance into the world. I know I've heard that the boys' lungs mature slower so the longer they bake the better.

Hoping and praying that this c-section is a breeze!!!

I was going to call you today... I'm glad to hear everything with Micah is well. Remember you have to enjoy this also.

I think you will go on friday... but thats just me.

Shari, what happened with your first c-section with Emma? I don't think I was a member at that time and was just curious as to what happened. Sorry to bring up bad and painful memories. My first c-section ended in a hematoma and I was out of work for 4 months. I was in such pain during that time that I feel like I missed out on my son's first 4 months of life. I missed his "firsts"... it was a horrible experience and I wouldn't want that for anyone. My 2nd c-section was quite the opposite and everything went wonderfully with it and healed nicely. I wish I could say the same with the first one.

I can only imagine how miserable you are - sounds like Micah will be a football player of sorts. :)  I hope things go much smoothly for you this time around and everything goes as planned.  :)


Karine

i hope you can hold out that last week...the fancy people being there will put your mind at ease... sorry about the no people under 14 thing... i cant wait to hear your story

Hang in there.   When faced with a challenge, I always tell myself, " I can do ANYTHING for (however long)."  You can do anything for a week!  I promise. 

Soothing thoughts for you - physically and mentally.  Family politics suck, and nonreliable family complicates matters.  My mom is that way, too.  I'll be thinking about you this week.  Hoping your c-section goes smoothly...Natalie

i hear what you are saying- and I can't blame you for the stress / anxiety that this delivery is bring you.  I know my sister had a bad c-section experience...but like everyone has said, they are likely to be different.  Hopefully, you'll get to your scheduled day.  I know as uncomfortable as I am this pregnancy I can't imagine I would make it to my day- but I was checked yesterday..and nothing is really happening. (Mine c-section is thursday) I sure hope you can get better soon...and yes-you are not alone in the grateful for the blessing of the baby, but dreading the "c-section" experience.  I am hoping, since this is planned it will be easier. Hours and hours of labor, patocin, etc were hell too.  I have water retention and swelling in places that no1 should have...its horrible, and painful.  Dreading your process (the end of the pregnancy is part of the process in my eyes)  has nothing to do with not enjoying the pregnancy or being thankful.  Oh- and one of my closest friends was named Micah he was one of the sweetest  / nicest boys I remember- can't wait until next week to see your little man. 

Shari,
tryt to relax and enjoy the last few days of this pregnancy... I am sorry that the c-section is not what you wanted :(

sorry no one under 14 is allowed in but you will have a nice meeting at the house with lots of pictures too...  I know you will miss Emma for those days while you are in the hospital... but a few days in the whole lifetime you have with your kids will seem small in the end...

try to stay positive!  Thinking of you!!!

-Amanda

Listen, you have the right to have bad days.  It doesn't mean that you don't love your children and it certainly doesn't mean you would give it back for anything in the world.  It means you are human.  LOL  

It gets uncomfortable towards the end of a pregnancy.  There's no denying it.   

And I am SO right there with you on the hospital issue as far as visitors.   No one seems to get it.  

Oh Shari you sound misreable hun! I know your cherishing every minute of your last pregnancy... but I can understand how uncomfortable you are and nervous. You went through hell with your c-section with Emma it's hard not to worry.

I like your attitude that this is a different situation- different docs.... I bet that little man comes on Friday!

I wish you the best of luck! I can't wait to see pics of Micah!!